The Ideal Body Weight Pisses Me Off

Weight ScaleFeel like losing weight?  What a surprise, me too!  Like every other knucklehead, I went to workout on New Year’s day to lose some weight I gained during the holidays.  I got a sweaty two hour tennis match in and then hit again with my buddy for another 1.5 hours the very next day.  I’m not delusional to think that after two days I would lose any amount of weight, but I stubbornly got on the scale before and after anyway.

Hoping to see a loss of a at least a pound due to less water weight, the damn scale betrayed me.  In two days, I had gained 5 pounds from 164 lbs to 169 lbs!  How the hell does someone gain 3% more body weight in just 48 hours.  I didn’t gorge myself during this period, so I’m at a loss for words.  I could blame the flashing “battery” signal on the scale, but that’s just an excuse.  I suck.

At slightly over 5 feet 10 inches tall, 169 lbs is a lot to carry on the tennis court.  Allen Iverson of the 76ers was my height (listed as 6 feet), but could easily dunk and weighed only 155 pounds for example.  Ever since that trip to India 11 years ago, my weight hasn’t fluctuated more than 4-7 pounds (162-169lbs).  But, now I’m dangerously close to breaking this 11 year record with all the crap I’ve been eating.  I feel guilty because in high school, I was a trim 150-155 lbs.  I also feel guilty because I’m disrespecting the poverty I witnessed in India and all around me.

I don’t accept mediocrity in my work, so why the hell do I accept being overweight and mediocre in my health?  Makes no sense at all.

MAN ON A MISSION TO LOSE WEIGHT

Five Creative Holiday Workouts

MusclesAh, the holidays are great for spending time with family, wearing ugly sweaters, and shoving enough shrimp cocktail, turkey, ham, cheese, fruitcake, cookies, Australian wagyu beef and more into our pie holes to make Homer Simpson blush. It’s the holidays! We can eat as much as we want! ‘Tis the season for eating guilt-free. Or is it?

I wouldn’t dare suggest that you or I should maybe put that 6th cookie back on the plate but maybe, just maybe, these 5 creative holiday workouts can help us to sneak in a few extra ways to burn off some of the excess calories we will be ingesting over this holiday season.

TOP FIVE CREATIVE HOLIDAY WORKOUTS

#1 The Sneaky “Family Time” Workout

The only thing worse than refusing a second helping of Grandma’s cornbread pudding is refusing a second helping of Grandma’s cornbread pudding and then telling everyone that you are “off to workout”. The dirty looks that you will get from your not so dedicated family members that are still busy shoveling in seconds and thirds can be amusing but a difficulty that you should avoid if at all possible. Rather than ditching the family to go workout, instead suggest a game of football, soccer, or basketball with the whole family. Be sure to give any family member not up for some “good ‘ol fashioned family time outdoors” your best look of disappointment.

The Fittest People Have The Lowest Self-Esteem

I’m somewhat obsessed with physical fitness right now.  It’s surprising, because the new year’s health push usually dissipates by February!  Just yesterday I thought, “What’s the point of being thin if I don’t have four pack abs?”  And then I started thinking what kind of person thinks about these types of questions?  Pretty unproductive and pointless if you ask me.

I’ve come to the conclusion that those with the highest self-esteem are the least fit and most indebted people on Earth.  Meanwhile, those who constantly think about their looks, and who are always at the gym exercising and pumping iron have the lowest self-esteem.  They are constantly checking themselves in the mirror to admire their physiques, even though they already know they look fine.

Think about the extreme case of anorexia.  Despite being thinner than the average person, the person who is inflicted with this disease doesn’t have the self-esteem to recognize their own beauty and stop punishing themselves.  Now think about the morbidly obese person.  Is this also a disease as well?  The person doesn’t really care what you think of him or her.

YOU ARE WHO YOU WANT TO BE

Dear Personal Trainer, You Are Worth The Money!

Ouch.  I’m so sore it feels so good baby!  I gave it a go with Meredith the personal trainer for a free 45 minute trial session and she did things to me that no woman has ever done before.  She made breathe heavily and sweat profusely!

She showed me exercises I never would have thought of doing to solely focus on getting me into shape for tennis.

45 Minute Trial Routine

* Sumo squat rope wave.  Whuh?

* Three TRX exercises to improve the quads, core, and shoulders.

* Wind sprints on the treadmill 3 minutes jog, 30 seconds sprint, 30 seconds rest 8X up to 12 mph.  I would never do these voluntarily.  Why suffer?

* Pro-roller stretches to roll out the calves, quads, IT bands and hamstrings.  Talk about pain all over.

* Side stepping through a maze for quickness and agility.

* Core training with cable pulleys three different ways.

* Four different stretches for the back, torso, and legs.

In retrospect, all the stuff I’ve been doing at the gym has been all wrong.  I was doing bench presses, butterfly squeezes, lat pull-downs, biceps, and triceps.  That’s it really.  I never bothered to do anything cardio, or work on the muscles that would help improve my serve or backhand.  I just went the easy route.  There is also 100% NO CHANCE I would have ever done any wind sprints or anything to make me sweat.  Again, I hate working out so I just focused on doing the easiest exercises that required the least amount of effort!

USING THE BLOG AND PERSONAL TRAINER TO SAVE SOME MONEY

Hire A Personal Trainer Or Get Buff On Your Own?

Working out sucks.  I hate it with a passion because I find it so wasteful to expend energy on doing nothing.  I would rather use the energy to build a house in Somalia, landscape the backyard, or play sports than lift some stupid weights.  That said, working out is also convenient because there’s a gym right across from me that I attend before every team or client dinner outing.  I figure I better pump some iron and jog a little before blitzing my diet!

One of my goals in 2011 is to win a tennis tournament.  To do so, I have to improve my endurance given I faded in both tournaments since we had to play back to back matches each day.  The season really gears up in March, leaving me with a solid two months to get in shape.  I know there is no way in hell I will be able to go to the gym 3X or more a week so I’ve thought about enlisting a personal trainer for help.

THE BIG BUCKS MIGHT BE WORTH IT

A Weight Loss Tip To Die For

Turkish BacklavaAre you feeling a little stuffed?  With parties and business meals galore, it’s so easy to pack on some weight and transform your once slender figure into a mound of dough.  Is there any wonder why many people fail their weight loss goals?  You can be doing great all year and then BAM, you wonder what happened.

The good thing about our bodies is that we have a natural mechanism to stop eating when we get full.  Otherwise, we’d all be unrecognizable in about a month.  However, if we’re honest, we know we often can’t control ourselves and overeat anyways.  I can’t control myself when it comes to eating buttery cookies and gobble two at a time.  Yum, yum.

My weight used to fluctuate in a 10 pound upward band, which is a lot considering I’m just under 6 feet and every pound counts on the tennis court.  I could be a taut 160 pounds one month and a soft 170 pounds just a couple months later if I wasn’t careful.  At my prime, I used to be 10 pounds lighter given I ran track as well.  Oh, to be that fit again.  Nowadays, my weight only fluctuates by 3-4 pounds since a visit to New Delhi and Agra 10 years ago that changed my outlook on eating forever.

SEEING THE WORLD CHANGES YOU

The Carrot That Makes You Jump Through Hoops

One of my best friends is blessed with skinny genes.  At 5′ 3″ tall, she weighs all of 105 pounds.  When we go out to eat, she doesn’t just order a glass of iced tea and salad with dressing on the side.  She goes all out with mash potatoes, creamed spinach, BBQ oysters and then a nice juicy ribeye for a main course!  I gawk in amazement at her appetite while secretly groaning at trying to keep up towards the end.  After all, shouldn’t she eat 40% less than me if she weighs 40% less?  Guess not!

Despite my friend’s envious genetics, she isn’t exactly iron woman when it comes to sports and outdoor activities.  After three miles on a 10 mile bike ride, she’s pooped and waves at me to take a break.  Meanwhile, I’m going “lah, lah, lah” in my head, not even breaking a sweat as I soak in the glorious views of the Bay.  I let her catch up and we take a five minute pit-stop where she catches her breath as I go do some stretches and sit-ups.

THE GIMMICK