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Posts Tagged ‘valentines’

Why Single Men Love Growing Old

February 13th, 2012 86 comments

Donkeys In LoveWhen I was younger, I got my heart broken by an older woman. It took about two months to muster up the courage to ask her out and when I did, all she responded was, “Sorry, I don’t date sophomores.”

No matter what I said, or what nice things I did for Karen, she was out of my league since I was younger. Karen was a 17 year old junior, and I was an incredibly good looking and intelligent 16 year old. I’m not making this up. This is exactly what my mom told me every time I brought her home cupcakes.

The rejection was devastating until a bright light named Stephanie joined my high school as a freshman. Stephanie was Karen’s younger sister and she was hot!  In fact, Stephanie was even more beautiful than her older sister, and I just had to pursue.

For one semester, Stephanie and I had a frolicking good time. We hung out after school together almost every single day. She’d come watch my tennis matches and I’d take her to McDonald’s afterward for some hot apple pie and McLovin. Let’s just say that older sister Karen wasn’t very happy with either of us. ‘Til this day, I don’t know why!  Ladies, please explain!

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