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Financial Freedom => Family Finances => Topic started by: Sam on June 05, 2019, 03:28:13 PM

Title: Two Children Combination Preferences By Sex
Post by: Sam on June 05, 2019, 03:28:13 PM
 Random question: if you were to have two children and only two children, what would the combination of sex be in order of preference?

1) Boy / Girl
2) Girl / Girl
3) Boy / Boy

I was thinking it would be nice to have one of each, but then I was thinking it’s great to have the same sex for both children as they would have more in common and could play together for longer in their lifetimes.

 What are your thoughts on it if this question or asked to 1 million people? What would the percentage breakdown be?

Sam
Title: Re: Two Children Combination Preferences By Sex
Post by: Captain on June 05, 2019, 06:20:00 PM
Perhaps 70% or so would choose boy/girl to have one of each if they had the option to choose. From a parent perspective it's nice to have one of each although there are more synergies with boy/boy or girl/girl. It's funny how some families with 3+ kids end up with all boys or all girls. You just never know how things will turn out which makes it all the more an adventure.
Title: Re: Two Children Combination Preferences By Sex
Post by: chrismoneystir on June 07, 2019, 02:29:03 PM
We have two children (with no plans to have any more) and both of them are girls. They are eight and ten right now, and they spend a ton of time playing with each other.

Part of me was hoping to have one boy so I could connect on that level with one of them, but now that I have two girls, I wouldn't change a thing. My oldest daughter likes video games more than me and my youngest is into sports.

I have three full biological siblings that are girls and we are not close at all. From my end, the closer in age they are, I think the more likely they will be able to play with each other (regardless of age). But I do think the argument that having two kids with the same sex increases the chances they will have a closer bond.
Title: Re: Two Children Combination Preferences By Sex
Post by: Young And The Invested on June 08, 2019, 04:42:34 AM
We have a boy on the way right now.  When the second comes into the picture, I'm certain to want a girl.
Title: Re: Two Children Combination Preferences By Sex
Post by: Sam on June 08, 2019, 05:59:05 AM
We have a boy on the way right now.  When the second comes into the picture, I'm certain to want a girl.

Can you elaborate on what makes you so certain?
Title: Re: Two Children Combination Preferences By Sex
Post by: Sam on June 08, 2019, 05:59:51 AM
We have two children (with no plans to have any more) and both of them are girls. They are eight and ten right now, and they spend a ton of time playing with each other.

Part of me was hoping to have one boy so I could connect on that level with one of them, but now that I have two girls, I wouldn't change a thing. My oldest daughter likes video games more than me and my youngest is into sports.

I have three full biological siblings that are girls and we are not close at all. From my end, the closer in age they are, I think the more likely they will be able to play with each other (regardless of age). But I do think the argument that having two kids with the same sex increases the chances they will have a closer bond.

Thanks for sharing. What is the age diff between u and your sisters?

I’ve had a couple women tell me they wish they had older brothers.
Title: Re: Two Children Combination Preferences By Sex
Post by: chrismoneystir on June 08, 2019, 06:23:36 AM
My oldest sister is 4-years younger than me. Which actually doesn't sound that bad, but we weren't very close. I could be an exception though.
Title: Re: Two Children Combination Preferences By Sex
Post by: Sam on June 08, 2019, 12:38:33 PM
My oldest sister is 4-years younger than me. Which actually doesn't sound that bad, but we weren't very close. I could be an exception though.

I’m thinking 2-3 years is a better age gap to foster closeness given the overlap in school.
Title: Re: Two Children Combination Preferences By Sex
Post by: Young And The Invested on July 13, 2019, 05:18:47 PM
We have a boy on the way right now.  When the second comes into the picture, I'm certain to want a girl.

Can you elaborate on what makes you so certain?

Happy wife, happy life.  She wants a daughter badly.  In truth, I'm indifferent but want her to be happy.
Title: Re: Two Children Combination Preferences By Sex
Post by: Sam on July 16, 2019, 01:17:08 PM
 Check out the results of a 1000+ survey here. https://www.financialsamurai.com/trophy-husbands-trophy-wives-and-now-trophy-kids-oh-my/
Title: Re: Two Children Combination Preferences By Sex
Post by: Young And The Invested on July 26, 2019, 03:06:58 PM
Good read.  I always appreciate the framing information for insight into why we think a certain way.  In this case, having a family of this size seems implausible absent significant financial resources in the high-cost of living area you modeled.

I think in other parts of the country with lower costs and presumably (hopefully) better public schools, you could get by with far less.  However, that wasn't the scenario you laid out in your post so it wouldn't be fair to highlight a different scenario as that's apples to oranges.

3 kids would be nice but 2 will be more likely.  I don't know if my wife wants to try for a third when she's knocking on 40.  Not only for health reasons but that would also extend the amount of time we'd need to work just to foot the costs.
Title: Re: Two Children Combination Preferences By Sex
Post by: hoping2retire35 on August 02, 2019, 12:22:10 PM
boy/ girl to experience both.

Though that is not a good answer, kids have very different personalities. We had boy/girl twins on our first try(if you can call it that-no treatments involved). We have had another since (boy). I think to maximize, or the minimal combo/amount to utilize, the experience is 4; two boys and two girls. They get to each experience a brother and sister and you can see how your offspring of even the same sex can be vastly different.
Title: Re: Two Children Combination Preferences By Sex
Post by: Sam on August 05, 2019, 09:08:17 AM
boy/ girl to experience both.

Though that is not a good answer, kids have very different personalities. We had boy/girl twins on our first try(if you can call it that-no treatments involved). We have had another since (boy). I think to maximize, or the minimal combo/amount to utilize, the experience is 4; two boys and two girls. They get to each experience a brother and sister and you can see how your offspring of even the same sex can be vastly different.

Congrats! Sounds like the "one more year syndrome" for retirement! :)
Title: Re: Two Children Combination Preferences By Sex
Post by: WengerTodd on January 25, 2020, 09:56:05 PM
Whatever comes out health and happy!
Title: Re: Two Children Combination Preferences By Sex
Post by: SteveGood on March 11, 2020, 11:10:00 PM


My brother have one boy and girl. The boy is 8 years old and that girl is 6 month child. They are happily spend the time with his children. I am also looking like that baby boy and girl in the future.
Title: Re: Two Children Combination Preferences By Sex
Post by: Irish247 on June 18, 2020, 09:04:04 AM
I think the opinion changes from before and after. I have two and it went Boy/Girl.  I remember when we found out the first was going to be a Boy, my wife was sad in a way, because she really envisioned a girl the whole time. When the time came to find out about number two, and we found out it was going to be a girl, she was sad in away again. She had loved having a boy so much she wasn't sure she wanted anything different.  Now after time with both of them, she and I couldn't imagine it any other way.

I have two different freinds that each have three kids. The first had a son a month or so after ours. Then they tried again and ended up with Twin boys. They were always set on the idea of having 4, however once they got the double dose on the second round, I think their opinion changed. They decided to stick with 3 boys, even though the thought was they wanted a girl. I guess the risk for them was trying for a girl and ending up with another set of twins or more.  3 confirmed was better than risking ending up with 5 or more when trying for 4.  They have no regrets anymore about not having a girl. They love the 3 boys, and wouldn't want it any other way.  When asked if they have any regrets on not having a girl, they both reply with what is better than three boys?

The other friend went the other way. They had a girl first and loved her beyond belief. They wanted to try for another, and it was a girl as well. Again happier than anything.  They just had another daughter not long ago, so now they have 3 girls. I believe they are done. When asked if they have any regrets on not having a boy, they both reply with what is better than three girls? 

So, I think in the end it doesn't really matter. The comment earlier nailed it, happy and healthy and I agree.  I will note though, that I have friends with children that are less than healthy we will say, and they still love them more than anything. Sure somethings are harder, and they will likely face challenges in the future, but the parents love their kids no matter what. They are after all their kids.

Interestingly enough, I'm one of five and i'm the only boy and the youngest. I don't necessarly think my parents were on a mission to have a boy, but since I was the last one and they stopped with me. I assume they reached the perfection they were looking for. Either as a result of me, or the five of us, who knows.

The greatest gift in life, I think is bringing a child into the world. There is no experience like it. So for those who go down the road of having children, just know it will be amazing, no matter what flavor you end up with.