The following is a guest post from long-time reader, Samurai Marco. It's nice to grow up rich. But here are his confessions as a spoiled rich kid would had everything at his disposal.
There are lots of rich kids nowadays since the stock market, real estate market, cyrptos and more have done so well. Further, there are plenty of rich kids who've started making money online.
Earning a lot of money early on and growing up with a lot of family wealth is nice. But there are some downsides. Raising spoiled kids is one of the biggest fears of FIRE parents.
What It's Like Growing Up Rich
When Sam first mentioned that he was accepting guest posts from his readers, it made me wonder what, from my financial journey, I could share. After all, you're already all a bunch of financial samurai's yourselves, right? Is my journey interesting enough? At 43 years old, have I made enough mistakes?
I grew up a spoiled rich kid in Cupertino, California, about an hour south of San Francisco. My father was a one of those, and I hate to use this term, “Serial entrepreneurs.” He started a lot of technology companies, a couple went public, some were acquired and, of course, a few failed.
I remember my Dad, back in the early 80's, bringing home the first prototypes of the Macintosh and Compaq computers and even the first cell phones.
His summer parties were filled with the “who's who” of Silicon Valley. I remember, in particular, one Christmas party in 1997, Gil Amelio and Steve Jobs made the deal for Apple to buy NEXT that night at my Dad's house.
The Forbes reporter, who was there, leaked it the next day I've gone flying with my Dad and Larry Ellison. I've talked stocks in the swimming pool with Eric Schmidt. So yes, I was surrounded by a lot of money and power and got a lot of attention for being my father's child.
To say I grew up spoiled really is an understatement It's taken me a long time to realize how “out of touch” my reality was back then. We flew first class to Italy every summer, sometimes twice a year, to visit family. We lived in a big house with a swimming pool in a “safe” neighborhood. My parents bought us whatever we wanted.
Confessions Of A Spoiled Rich Kid
My first car was a brand new convertible BMW and I was just seventeen years old. We were members of the tennis club and I took as many lessons as I wanted, whenever I wanted. By the time I was 21, I had a pilot's license and my own single engine airplane stationed at Santa Ana airport.
My dad paid for everything, all my housing and education including a BA in Sociology from UC Irvine and an MBA from Santa Clara University. I never worked in college and, in fact, my dad was giving me a hefty monthly allowance, for as long as I can remember, even after college.
When I left for college in 1988, it was a reality blow. Growing up in a rich kid in Silicon Valley, I realized that not everyone was living as comfortably as I was.
People were talking about “debt” and having to “work” one or two jobs, while they were in school. I could not believe that people, in addition to studying for classes and preparing for exams, had to work too?! What kind of life was this!?
My parents were divorced by now. My dad was on his third major company that would add even more millions to his treasure chest. So I did what a rich spoiled college kid does when in college. . . .PARTY!!!
I made friends, joined a fraternity, flew around in my plane, drove around in my BMW, experimented with alcohol and drugs and really just had a blast. I got my BA in four years graduating with a 3.35. Not bad for a spoiled rich kid, huh?
Working On Life Instead Of On Work
My first two years out of college had nothing to do with working. In fact, I had never really planned to actually work. Instead, I lived in Lake Tahoe for a year in my parent's house, skiing and studying classical guitar. The second year I backpacked through Europe with a girlfriend.
I bet you're asking, “Your parents just let you do this?” and the answer is yes, I could pretty much do whatever I wanted. Maybe they didn't know any better or it was their way of showing me love. I really don't know. Anyway, at the time it was fine with me and yet, looking back, confusing as hell.
In 1994, after studying music in Tahoe and traveling, I moved into my dad's mansion in Los Gatos and started my MBA. I lived there, rent free, in the maid's quarters and was paid a fat allowance. I ended up living here for about five years, getting my MBA and eventually getting a job, through a friend of my Dad's, at a tech PR firm in Redwood City.
In 1995, I took control of my trust fund. I had no idea what to do with the modest amount of money, as my only experience had been spending it! Eventually, through the advice of another family member, I started investing in stocks like AOL, Dell and Microsoft.
By April of 2000, five years later, the original amount had multiplied by almost 15 times! The technology bull run had made me a millionaire on paper! About a month later, that same family member told me the markets were getting sketchy and too volatile and advised me to sell.
Sound familiar? I hesitated and eventually followed his advice and sold everything. I took some of the money and bought the condo I still own in San Francisco.
A year later the dot com crash happened and I was the only one my age I knew, other than my brother, with any money. I was thrilled, totally confused, and didn't know what to do with my life. But I fell into a bit of a depression. I was totally burned out.
As a result, I quit my PR job. Then I left my girlfriend and for the next couple years I was just hanging around SF going to therapy, reading self help books, practicing guitar, playing tennis, and spending time with my brother and his family.
I felt unworthy of the money and the extravagant lifestyle I had been living for the past several years.
How Life Is Going Now
Fast forward to today, and not that much has changed. I'm still bouncing around! I spent the rest of my thirties and early forties trying to figure out what I wanted to do and who I wanted to be.
I've been experimenting, working for a few years as a tennis instructor and musician for Club Med, almost four years as a live music venue owner in San Francisco, again in tech PR in in Los Angeles, and, most recently, as a restaurant owner in the Dominican Republic.
Would I have ended up like this if I had been raised differently with stricter parents? Probably not and, frankly, we'll never know, so who cares?! Today, I try to view work more as a form of play. Looking for things that are challenging and push me toward my higher self. Maybe it's been easier because there's always been money around. Maybe it's my personality. Probably a bit of both.
Even so, my forties have been a big slap in the face.
All of a sudden you're not really “young” anymore. You can still occasionally act like an idiot, even though people expect a certain level of maturity from you. This has been hard for me. My whole life, I've been able to do whatever I want. Turn on a dime and go in any direction. I'm still trying!
As of today, I'm living in Montreal with my lovely and loving girlfriend of three years, in the process of selling a Punta Cana condo I bought in early 2013, trying to sell a Punta Cana restaurant I bought in late 2013, looking for some kind of stable work, and choosing to have gratitude for how this crazy journey that keeps unfolding before me.
What keeps making me want to work, Sam asks? Why do I still have some ambition, even though I could probably get by, fairly comfortably, without ever having a job again?
I'm not sure what it is. Sometimes I think I have too much energy for my own good and just like staying busy. Maybe I'm trying to outdo my Dad?
I've always seen my personal life and business as two sides of the same coin, so whatever I'm doing, if there's an opportunity to make a buck and secure my future that much more, why not? It's also nice to know that I can leave some money and assets behind to the people and causes I love.
Lessons I've Learned About Money Growing Up As A Spoiled Rich Kid
If you grew up a little spoiled or clueless about money, here are some lessons and tips I can share with you. Remember, it's not your fault the way you grew up. You were just born and your parents raised you.
1) Get therapy quick!
Seriously, if you're a narcissist, as I was and still am a bit, fix that as soon as possible. As soon as I “let go” and forgave my past, especially issues with my parents not being there as much as I would have liked them to be, opportunities stared knocking again.
If you're stuck in a “poor me” attitude, whether you're poor or a billionaire, you're going to be unhappy and unlucky. I went through a lot of therapy, read a lot of psychology and self help books and began writing daily in a journal. This has saved my life, for sure.
2) Spoil your kids with love, not money.
I don't know if it was a generation thing or just my particular experience. For most of my life, I thought that money grew on trees and I could have as much as I wanted whenever I wanted. I had to read and learn so many things for myself.
Parents, please teach your kids the value of money and work and, please, place love and nurturing ahead of money. Lead by example by being loving and present with your kids. If you set aside a trust fund, make sure they don't get it until they are in their 30's or later. In fact, maybe skip the trust fund!
3) Take a break!
Burn out is normal and, if you don't take breaks, you will probably not succeed at anything. For some of us, a weekend is enough of a break. For me, sometimes I need a month or a year to let things sink in and start on a new path. Know yourself, your situation, and the amount of time you need before your next big burst of energy.
4) Continuously manage your relationships.
Geez, this one is so cliche and so important. Money comes from people, not from some robot cash dispenser. If you have a network of people you trust and trust you and your skills, you will be OK. If you go at it alone for too long, you're going to be in trouble down the road.
I'm a bit in this situation right now, as I've moved around so much, it's been hard to nurture relationships, both professional and personal. So, please big shot VC … get back to me!
5) Try not to look back.
You have to believe that there is exponentially more opportunity in the present moment than there ever has been in your past. Even those big moments you think you missed. . that's your mind playing tricks on you. Your past, like the present, really is an illusion.
Even this post, it's based on images from my past that I'm choosing to remember and write about. Take a snap shot of your financial situation right now and see if you can make some decisions without letting the past OR the future blind you. I struggle with this every day.
Sam wrote a great post making the case how wealthy parents shouldn't worry about spoiling their adult children. The reason why is because because by the time wealthy parents start their decumulation phase, their adult children will already be set in their ways. It makes sense to me!
6) Be OK with starting over.
Could I have had done better financially considering my background, early start and education? Hell yes! You can always have done better. That kind of thinking is a waste of time and energy. There's always a chance to start again. Remember, the present moment is always 100% pure potential and you can make a decision at any moment that can turn your world around.
Related: How To Accept Help From Your Parents Without Feeling Like A Deadbeat Loser
My Thoughts On Being A Spoiled Rich Kid
I want to thank Marcos for sharing his thoughts on growing up as a spoiled rich kid. This post was originally published in 2014, three years before my first kid was born.
As a father of two children today, I certainly do not want to spoil my kids. I want to teach them about the value of money, hard work, and developing a strong work ethic. It may be better to raise our children in discomfort than in an environment of luxury.
I see my neighbor's kids all living at home with them as 30-40 year old adults. It's really sad. The reason why they are still living at home is because their parents gave them everything growing up! We parents need to educate our children about the importance of work, saving, and investing at a young age. Then we've got to demonstrate what we preach.
After eight years of parenthood, I've become convinced that nurture plays a bigger role than originally thought in shaping financially independent, thoughtful, and well-adjusted adults.
While our kids are still under our guidance, we might as well equip them with the work ethic and tools they need to succeed. Here are some ways your children can start making money from a business. The key is to get them to start working early. The other key is parents actually starting a business or being a sole proprietor. The more parents can take action, the better it will be for your children.
Be Careful Giving Our Kids Everything
When you have everything as a kid, your motivation naturally wanes. It's worth trying to make your kids millionaire by 20, provided they work for their money.
During their time working, it's great to teach your kids about investing and compound returns. The last thing I want to do is just give my kids money!
I promise I will always work hard and practice what I preach. As a result, my children will see that despite our wealth, dad and mom still work hard every day.
We will travel to other countries to see how other people live. I will teach my children Mandarin and Japanese to provide new perspectives. And I'll make them do manual labor, like landscaping a rental property so they can appreciate the value of hard work.
At the end of the day, I just want my kids to find purpose, love, and happiness.
For more nuanced personal finance content, join 50,000+ others and sign up for the free Financial Samurai newsletter. Confessions of a spoiled rich kid is a FS original post.
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The best thing you can do as a rich kid is to get rich yourself. Save aggressively, invest wisely, work on side hustles, land a great job, and build as much passive income as possible.
ALEX I NEVER SAID I WAS RICH FAR FROM IT, I BOUGHT A UNIQUE FIXER UPPER SO THEY CALL THEM IT NEEDED A TON OF WORK . MY HUSBAND NEVER JOINED IN ON BEING PART OF HE FAMILY HE WAS BUSY BEING SELF DESTRUCTIVE. I DIDN’T KNOW HOW TO GET OUT BELIVE ME I TRIED I EVEN OFFERED TO LET HIM FIND SOME WOMAN HE COULD BE IN LOVE WITH AND GO FIND YOUR HAPPINESS THAT DIDN’T HAPPEN. IT WAS A PAINFUL LIFE. LATE IN LIFE I HAD TWO STORKES AND ALMOST DIED COUNTLESS TIMES DURING MY LIFE FROM A SICKLY BODY. THE DAY I CAME HOME FROM PHYSICAL REHAB FROM MY STROKES THERE WAS A NOTICE ON MY DOOR SNOW ON THE GROUND STILL IN A WHEEL CHAIR ONLY TO BE TOLD I WOULD PAY ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS A DAY FOR EVERYDAY FIVE PIECES OF WOOD AT THE TOP OF MY HOUSE WASN’T FIXED IT WAS FOUR SIDES BRICK FOR MOST OF IT. I DIDN’T HAVE TWO NICKELS TO RUB TOGETHER SO I SOLD WHAT HAD GROWN TO BE EXSPENIVE LAND FOR A FRACTION OF THE MONEY IT WAS WORTH OR I COULD HAVE LOST ALL. A RICH SPOILED KID WHO’S PARENTS HAD TONS OF MONEY IN THE BACK SICKED THE GOVERNMENT ON ME WHILE I WAS IN THE HOSPITAL FIGHTING FOR MY LIFE I HAD ANOTHER STOKE WHILE I WAS IN THE HOSPITAL SO YOU THINK YOU HAD ME ALL PEGGED OUT LOL NOT HARDLY. I JUST REFUSED TO GIVE UP. AND I FIND HAPPINESS IN EVERY DAY LIFE AS BEST I CAN. YOU SHOULD NEVER ASSUME ANYTHIING. I USED MY BRAIN TO MAKE IT THIS FAR IN LIFE. IT’S ALL GOOD. FIND YOUR DAILY JOY. I HAVE BEEN COMPLETELY BROKE MOST OF MY LIFE I JUST DON’T GIVE INTO IT.
My genuine earnest advice is, if this is a problem you have, get rid of all your money, pay off other people’s medical bills, donate it to charity, pay for people who are escaping abusive families whatever works. Sell all your houses bar the one you want to live in. Then actually work to earn your keep. The problem the author here and others have is that even if you like the job you find there’s no drive to do it outside of it being a hobby functionally. But if you have a reason to do it (putting food on the table) you may finally find reason and purpose in what you do.
Chairman Mao we need you back
To mass murder people and watch them starve? Guess you’re a gender studies graduate, huh?
Genociding rich people and giving their stuff to those who deserve it sounds pretty nice. I despise leftists and their gibberish ideologies, but they’re right about that.
Don’t bother posting this kind of article in the future. The guy is still out of touch with reality.
My reality is more real than his reality. Please only post realities that make sense to me.
I’m not looking to understand different perspectives.
Ummm … his reality is just as real to him as your reality is to you. If you are not looking to understand different perspectives, why are you reading this blog? If you only want to read about realities that make sense to you go write your own blog.
The only good thing about this article is knowing the author is getting therapy just to learn how to be less obnoxious and out of touch with reality.
It makes me upset that other people
have it better than me!
I grew up a poor kid. Im speaking to everyone here who arent rich when I say, dont take it so seriously when a rich inheritant says they had it hard in life. Maybe to them it was. To us it would be a breeze in the park. Dont take it to heart. And to the others who grew up on a silver platter, dont say that things are so easy because you dont know half of the truth of what a struggle truely is. We all come from different backgrounds. Life sucks sometimes. Lets have some humility here. So what you grew up rich. Good for you pat yourself on the back. But we cant blame them for being borned into it. Poor kids, Shit, we were born into a messed up life. Sucks but hey we know what it is to have nothing so make something out of it. We cant choose what were born into trust me I know. But we can always make whats best out of it. It took me a long time to make some kind of money the right way but even if the figures i make is considered laughable to the rich, to me ive made it. So to everyone, dont degrade the other side. Just silver platters, dont go around saying you know the hard life when you have a wad of cash and us poor folk, dont throw anger at people who dont understand the struggle. Just ignore it.
Dear spoil rich person,
I am in debt almost $70,000 because my very smart son wanted to go to USC coz he thought it was going to be the best university he could go, he was at the magnet high school next to usc, and the magnet people washed his brain. By now we should be at least paid on all his loans, but that is not possible, because of the circumstances of the times. The most disheartening thing is that he has not been able to get a job with his computer degree because some of your comrades where bought ahead and they were hired because their fathers and mothers knew the people in the industry, and some of the mother divorce those fathers and married these other guys. Is a culture of vultures that can only exist on they’re on realm not realizing they need everybody around them to co-exist in the real world. I can only tell you that one of these days some people will get tired and you and your family will have what you truly deserve.
And by the way, if only the rich people will donate their inheritance tax money, there would not be a single poor people in the greatest country of the world which is the uSa!
May I ask what was the decision to go to USC vs. UCLA, which is cheaper and higher ranked?
What part of “brainwashing” didn’t you understand?
Didn’t realize he was brainwashed. Apologies as English is my second language.
Perhaps share something about yourself? Did you grow up a rich kid as well? Do you have kids?
I’m just trying to do my best as a father to be aware of things for my children.
This is a very calm response to an unnecessarily aggressive comment- good on you, Sam.
When my youngest son told me he wanted to go to college at MIT, I told him, “Well, you’d better get a scholarship then because there’s NO WAY we can afford to send you to MIT!”.
I suppose we could have figured something out; I think the real reason I told him that was because I didn’t want him moving to the opposite side of the country to go to school and then perhaps ending up living that far away. I think I did mention something about CalTech, but at the time he had his heart set on MIT.
The point is sometimes parents have to tell their children “No”, and hold the line on that no.
Dear Rich Kid reading this,
From the bottom of my heart, you are trash! You guys can write about your experiences and how you became “self made” millionaires after inheriting trust funds, but it’s a weak attempt to simply build your egos. You privileged shits of the Bay Area will most likely never realize how blessed you are, and that is your curse to break for the rest of your lives. Good luck and hope you don’t end up in hell!
– Former Rich Kid
I used to have it all, and I lost everything. I hate my life and I hate anybody who has more than me.
I’m not sure when you posted this, most responses seem to be from 2014 or lesser, but here I am a drunk rich kid whos just turned 21 and google searched about rich kids experiences because I myself am so damn miserable. Here I am living in an exclusive neighborhood where we own not only our personal four million dollar home but multiple estates as small rental property income as well (100k)+ but still unhappy. at 18 my first car was a range rover sport. We live next to celebrities, the people that some would kill to get a picture with are my daily encounters. I don’t care. i live in a house where our $40,000 property taxes per year arent nearly as much as our yearly dues as golf members. My parents like the author of this article enable this type of behavior. I club whenever i want, have a limitless amex card, and pick up the hottest milfs because of it. IM 21. and im miserable. These things arent what make you happy. I know what will, i just lack it. Sincerely, drunk rich kid whos dad sold a company for 9 figures. It might be 2020 but still keeping it real. Most reading your post are poor and envious. I feel your situation.
The older you get and the more you contribute to society, the happier you’ll become. There is nothing more gratifying than creating something of your own. At only 21, your life is just beginning!
If you want perspective, fly to India and live there for a month. I’m sure you will appreciate more of what you have.
GL!
Don’t go to India. Go to the other side of the tracks for a year, rent a modest apartment, and work a real job, and learn to actually be good at it. You have no character unless you can do that(Hint: most rich kids won’t make it 2 weeks, they can’t actually handle a level playing field in life, or being FORCED to do something they consider “menial” for 7 hours in a shift on their feet).
Be a laborer on a job site or a waiter, and show up via public transit or a crappy beater. Don’t talk about yourself or your family unless you are talking real talk. Get to know your co-workers and earn their respect.
The actual achievement most rich kids can’t claim is to have made friends or earned respect from folks who will never see more than a paycheck to paycheck existence, or maybe a modest 401k match, or a pat on the back for being the best dishwasher or fork lift driver at their store.
This is the most sensible advice I’ve read in a long time! Sometimes I think FS is really out of touch. You don’t need to go to India. Has he been to downtown LA? Or downtown SF for that matter?
Why is going to downtown SF “better” than going to India to be more in touch?
What is your reality that makes yours better than mine and others? I don’t get it.
I see thousands of perspectives on Financial Samurai every year due to the thousands of comments left on the thousands of posts on this site.
My goal is to increase the perspectives of everyone.
I can probably help out. I’m a 29 year old educator, not as similar of a childhood, but also similar economic background and knowing a lot of people like that. I would recommend working with people in a safe, normal environment to give you perspective.
MY life wasn’t garbage but most of the people in it were. Had alot of fun, raised great kids,but it all kind of fell apart. I had two strokes so I’m a bit of a mess right but I think I’m always living off the little things that make me happy. Ioffered my rebellious family a way out of their money issues but not one will accept. I wouldn’t like to die with everyone messing up in life, how can I get family to participate? One daughter is back home with a dead beat boy friend and baby we support. Husband is nightmare of a human. I have a very doable program but they are scared and frozen comes across as pig headed always? I don’t want them to have to suffer like I did it makes life so hard.
I laugh at these people who are rich and claim there life is so hard id kill to have what u have and id use it for a better purpose. I would buy poor pple houses and get them jobs and more . the rich will never understand what its like to be poor or struggle hell im 26 no car live with roomates only have 12k saved and that has to go to trade school and a car trade school cost 12k and my job is 6miles away so i gotta catch the bus always to get to and from places how about helping pple why does no one think of that when there rich go to some walmart offer to buy 10 pple there groceries each day i mean shii wouldnt hurt your a millionaire i just wanna be able to travel own a car and own my house and have a fun life but sadly that will never happen i will die before it happens i really hope stock market crashes and millions of rich pple end up homeless and broke. See when rich fall they dont know what to do but the poor do
Lol, can I have a million dollars so I can start my life and pay my debts please.
Hey Rich Stanford Kid,
Im sorry to hear your situation. I hope your doin better now and if not I’ll say a little prayer for you. I myself can’t say I can relate I come from humbling roots But at the end of the day we are all human beings that have emotions. I agree with you that there’s a lot hate that comes from people who don’t have the same lifestyle as you. Anyway, your post touched me and I assume your a strong person so stay positive don’t give up…..FYI I googled why rich people boast about not ‘workin’ I work for a rich family and the husband started saying rich families like his don’t work so I was like confused when he said that. But, the more I started reading this for some reason gave me hope and assurance that we are all just humans in different situations.
From a humble Latinx
Andrew Carnegie made it clear to his wife and daughter that he would NOT leave them his fortune. The prenup stated that she’d get their two homes, an endowment, and nothing more. The bulk of his money was going to his libraries, universities, and museums. Today, his descendants all have well-paid jobs.
Now look at the John Paul Getty clan. His descendants are drug users, wastrels, playboys, and layabouts. Even the Kennedy’s didn’t do as well as they claim. The British nobility are also full of drug addicts and bums. When the money runs out (and it always runs out) all they have left are their lovely manners.
Look up 8ball & MJG – Confessions
This guy is in hs forties and sounds still so seriously out of touch with reality. Casually mentioning taking months or years vacation like normal human beings can relate to that.
Wow what a spoiled brat. Mommy and daddy will give him everything and never understand the value of hard work people like him should leave if you do not work and get everything handed to you leave America does not need spoiled brats like you we need hard working Americans. Not rich bratty kids that end up ruining the lives of good hard working Americans. I hate rich kids not out of jealousy but our of the lives of millions of Americans who have their lives ruined because of them. People like them are better of killing themselves no one will miss them.
That’s a very rude response. Sounds like you need to do some soul searching.
Not to mention with all the time off and vacations how did he get burnt out? Wish we all had trust funds and family friends in high places that knew what tech stocks would do before it happened.
I found this article by searching “I hate rich kids” on google. A person like me, who has not had much love from my parent, since they neglected me and left me with no money, since they had none, feels envious. I am working, going to school and all the motions of a normal human just so that I can afford a house, or a trip to Italy one day. I am also happy for you, and it’s nice that people do get to live lives like this, and manage to help others. Congratulations. But it’s upsetting at the same time. I know that I shouldn’t derive my happiness from money, but it’s hard not to. Thanks for sharing your story.
By destroying the lives of real hard working Americans doubt it i hope someone finds him dead in a ditch somewhere spoiled entitled rich kids leave our country we do not like you. Good move to Italy we have no love for spoiled brats here that have everything handed to them. All that crap claiming you gone to school and work is a lode of crap you just got all your money from mommy and daddy and never worked hard in your entire life like all rich people. I hate all you rich spoiled people not out of jealousy but the countless lives you ruined because you too selfish to help the poor who work their butt off so you fat cows can get rich.
You are 43 yrs lived 15956 days.
In the remaining days learn know feel live who is really Jesus and as he promised the Helper
Get married and have kids..
I think spoiling a child, whether it is on the grand scale he related, or even a modest one is extremely harmful to them. How can you properly relate to a world in which most people are working very hard to have a decent existence? How can you feel pride in yourself if you have zero to strive for? I grew up in a (barely) middle class new suburb in the ’60s/’70s. I became passionate about motorcycles @ age 7. Drooling over the primitive minibikes in the Sears Catalog, it took ’til the age of 10 to realize my parents would NEVER buy me such an extravagant gift, even if they could afford it. You had to work hard for stuff! At age 11, I picked strawberries and did yard work in summer. I babysat year ’round, @ $0.50 an hour. I saved for 4 years, and when I was 15 I bought a brand new, full size street legal 100cc dirt bike. The pride and satisfaction of accomplishing that goal did a large part in what modest success I’ve had in life. I’m forever grateful for the work ethic they instilled in me.
Heyy, Marco
I know this post has been up here for quite a while but I’m really hoping you get to see my comment.
I read your post through and through and honestly it touched me a whole lot. The things you experienced while growing up are the stuff I see on TV or in movies.
I’m an African, a Nigerian to be precise. An average family’s life here is hard to say the least. Growing up in such a family with 3 younger ones to cater for is no joke.
I always wanted to be a writer. Words were my escape. I loved how things came to life on paper with several ideas bursting in my head.
I had to drop that career line though because my parents felt it wouldn’t pay enough to support me.
But considering my country’s economy, it’s kinda true. I’m 18 years old girl and in my second year in college. I’m about to get a BSC in computer science.
I love the course too and I’m really good at programming and coding. But funds to support me through school are gradually running out and I don’t know what to do.
Part time jobs are really hard to get here and it’s been really difficult with my younger ones to cater for too.
Please it would be really helpful if you could reach out to help.
I’d be really grateful.
-Oluwatomi
Reminds me of my own life. Resonates so much with me. I am so tired of hearing about how people go from rags to riches, how people tell me I am lucky and life could have been so tough if I didn’t have rich parents. But only few people really talk about the difficulties of being a second generation wealthy kid. We never experience hardships and that makes us soft. We screw up, go crazy, create our own problems which can’t be solved n are mostly in our own heads, cos we don’t have actual problems like the so called less fortunate people have. And we feel guilty that we don’t deserve ant of that and that makes us act more spoilt cos we worry we might one day lose all we got, which we will cos we are soft n not so smart with money. We just inherit loads of it, but not the knowledge n experience to manage it.
Sam says…you also need to listen to 8ball & MJG – Confessions
I am in a similar position, I just try to see it as God (whether or not you believe in god, call it reality) gave you wealth for a reason, you are not meant to hoard it or squander it, you are meant to use it to help the less fortunate.
You need to become financially independent and then use your advantage to help mankind.
Ok,
Here is a different slant, I grew up in a big family in Ohio, I got into sales and have moved up quickly in the Auto industry, I have worked miracles as a CEO of large groups, I have always been principally guided, and have still not come close to wealth.
My Integrity has always been my guide, and I have taught my children this. I always look for the good and believe there is greatness in everyone of us, I have watched people who I believe aren’t as passionate or honest become rich, yet I still struggle, I have a deep faith in god Ibelive we all have a responsibility to leave this life making this a better place, etc…
Any help or advice would be welcome..
Hi Dave – Money is a certain type of energy and, like people who have similar energy, it flows to where it feels the most comfortable. Put yourself in money’s shoes and ask if money finds you attractive. Do you find money attractive? I see money a bit like a girl who likes bad boys. You gotta get her attention and keep it! Integrity and discipline, which sounds like you have that covered, are awesome and definitely play a role. I suggest letting go of this idea of others being less or more passionate and honest and, as a result, more or less deserving of money than someone else. That’s one of the oldest tricks in our capitalist society for keeping the victim-minded person angry and out of the money flow. Look into tapping into the darker side of money, in the form of creativity, playfulness and more self-confidence.
Agreed. The goal is to guide your kids. And allow them to change course and have as much flexibility as possible to try new things and stay DRUG-FREE. If they want to go off and do crazy things that’s fine too! :) Life is a journey and a learning experience for all of us!
Thank you for this article, and for one of the most intriguing comment threads I’ve seen lately. May I pose a question to the comments section?
The question is about a contradiction I noticed in the unfavorable comments, the ones that raged against the unfair privileges of a wealthy upbringing compared with the sufferings of those who have nothing. I’m not going to dispute that premise; its truth is obvious. However, it seemed that the rage-commenters were angry with Marco for two specific things:
1. Not working at paying jobs, whereas poor people need to work even if they hate it
2. Working at paying jobs, thus taking them away from poor people could really use them
My question: if Marco is to be hated for not working, and also to be hated for working, what is he supposed to do? Is there anything he can do that will satisfy the rage-posters?
And on a related subject, what about philanthropy? If Marco gives money to people and/or causes, is he being a gracious benefactor, or an arrogant meddling plutocrat? Both? Neither?
I think at bottom, Marco himself is asking the same question. To quote his reply to one poster above: what would you have him do?
There are rich people born one inch from the finish line, and poor people whose struggles and sufferings are doomed and hopeless because of their poverty, and that sucks. It seems clear therefore that the Marcos of the world are the ones with the most agency, so they’re the obvious candidates to do something about it. But what? Going by this comment section, no matter what Marco does, it’s going to be the wrong thing. But there also seems to be a lot of anger because he hasn’t done… something. It’s not clear what.
So that’s my question. What is Marco to do?
Thanks in advance for your answers.
Hi thanks for your insightful perspective on the comments. I’ve decided it’s clear what I am to do: CELEBRATE LIFE by PLAYING, creating, LOVING GOD, being joyful, here, NOW, always.
Rich, poor and in-between, we all have our own individual experiences and we all want to live a life that we can ENJOY and be PROUD of. I do this by praying and loving god, teaching tennis, spending quality time with family and friends, traveling, meeting people, reading, writing, meditating, piloting, journaling and writing and playing live music. I love my life and it’s all because I choose to do, think, feel and be around things I love. Life is 100% what YOU make it. Peace.
I recently stumbled across this article, and I must admit I can somewhat relate. I was raised in a wealthy family, with loving parents. Despite this, I lived a relatively normal life. I wasn’t overly spoiled, went to public school, volunteered frequently, and started earning my own money at 10 years old. I was taught the value of money and relationships.
As minimal and trivial as OP’s story may seem to people who have less, I don’t think feelings should be invalidated due to wealth most of the time (unless your problems are how you can’t get the Rolls Royce you wanted.) There are generous and nice rich people who are told they can’t feel depressed/lonely because they have money. That’s like me telling other posters on this site, ‘Stop complaining about how you struggle to get a job and provide for your family! There are poor people who literally have nothing!’ Everyone has feelings.
Wealth is relative. There will be rich and poor people. Some people will be born into money, others will have to work for it. You can scrutinize others for wasting opportunity, but that’s their life to live, not yours. Meanwhile, focus on living your own life to the maximum. Complaining about their lives won’t change your situation, nor will it change theirs.
I was lucky, being given the opportunities I had. I am very thankful as well. I’m independent now and living a modest, average lifestyle. I wish OP and everyone else the best of luck.
I can somehow relate to this, cause I come from wealthy family too (multi millionaire level though, not some crazy wealth like OP, but they really spoil us with love and opportunities)
I often lack a sense of purpose though. I love to work not because of noble reasons such as good work ethic, ensuring my future, making something out of myself in this world etc, but because it feels much better and keep me busy compared to playing around aimlessly, if that adds money and security I consider it an extra bonus
I often don’t do everything to my best ability because I know that my parents can help and bail me out anytime, I’m still working on those though
I sympathize with OP because rich people have problems too, I can understand if people hate the douchebag kind rich, but decent rich people are often lonely, being too hard on themselves, miserable cause lack of people to relate to, and doesn’t trust people much cause of circumstances
I’ve seen it enough to the point that I never jealous of those with better “toys” (house, cars, yacht, boat, women etc, you name it), and I often sympathize them to use money as escapism (many rich people do and buy ridiculous things because of hobbies, social status, boredom, or loneliness too. I seriously sympathize those who do it for boredom and loneliness)
Sure the rich are often the employer and gains the most profit, but if you aren’t the douchebag kind, ensuring that the business keeps running while our employee can make a decent living is a fucking headache too
Hi Marco, thank you for a great post.
I am a certified teacher who gives private lessons to spoiled rich kids.
I’m getting concerned with their lack of motivation, and worry for their future.
If you are still checking these messages, and don’t mind me picking your brain, please send me an email at silk2818@gmaildotcom.
Thank you.
That was an interesting read.
I think all of us, at the end of the day, rich or poor, feel this need to have a purpose to give meaning to everything. The rich may be distracted by the baubles of their wealth, the poor distracted by the daily struggle to get by– however, if lucky enough, there would be that moment of silence and clarity in our mind where we begin to ask what the hell all this is for and where is this headed, the big picture. Honestly, to be visited by that momentary epiphany is a blessing, privilege and burden rolled into one.
You’re lucky in the sense that you have the tools to help you get to where you think you should head, and with the level-headedness and self-awareness you obviously already possess, I’ve no doubt you will find what you are looking for. It is more frustrating the other way around, to not have the tools to achieve your goal, no matter how altruistic… very, very frustrating to have to search for people who may want to support it. I regret not giving importance to financial security, essentially for being naive about how it will allow follow once you figure out your “mission”.
I actually came across this blog and your blog post while randomly surfing after being shown an Instagram account called Rich Kids of Russia and, I believe there are other incarnates of that (pick a nationality). One can only hope those kids manage to walk the similar awareness journey you’re on, for their own sake.
Good luck and thanks for sharing your story.
Oh and i forgot to give an example of the two that I am looking at here they are – BMW X5
You know, just because you’re not rich doesn’t mean you can’t look rich. For example, if you want a shiny new BMW X5, why not just buy a used one a few years old? If it’s it great shape most people will think it’s new anyway! The link is a couple examples that I am already considering and so should you if you are on a budget but feel the need to impress.
You know, just because you’re not rich doesn’t mean you can’t look rich.
Those people are the worst.
For example, if you want a shiny new BMW X5, why not just buy a used one a few years old?
Because maintenance on those things is horrific-poorly made, and really expensive parts.
This was such a great article describing the difference between the social classes being 22 I am just graduating college and love using these sites to focus on building wealth for my future never getting married want to travel the world.Hey Marco I know this article is old but I am writing a paper I would love some insight on how school as for you I am writing about cost of education over the years and how it changes from different classes of people let me know if you see this thanks have a great day.