As responsible parents we set up a revocable living trust so that in case of our untimely demise, our son would be protected and taken care of. Going through public probate court is not only a hassle, but a violation of our financial privacy.

When I asked my centimillionaire buddy what type of estate planning he does, since his net worth is well over the estate tax exemption amount per person of $11.4M, he said a main strategy he uses is the Grantor Retained Annuity Trust or GRAT.

If the GRAT is set up and executed properly, a significant amount of wealth can move down to the next generation with virtually no estate or gift tax ramifications.

Let’s learn how a GRAT works with a couple of examples that show how millions of dollars can be saved in estate taxes.

In my Quora e-mail digest, I stumbled upon the most amazing and heartfelt estate plan I’ve ever read.

A user asked: If you were left millions in your parent’s will, but your brother or sister were left nothing, would you give them some money?

I think the large majority of us would say, “absolutely yes.” Even if we had lost touch with our siblings or felt they never treated us or our parents right, our grief and guilt alone would spur us to share something.

All these public family squabbles in probate court due to the failure of the deceased to create a private revocable living trust are so sad. It really pains me when money comes between family, especially after a death.

Here’s where one answerer, Jeff E. revives some of my faith in humanity. Let’s read what he has to say.

With the racism and sexual assault allegations that have befallen the Governor of Virginia, the Attorney General of Virginia, and the Lt. Governor of Virginia, I was reminded of all the racist altercations I experienced growing up in Virginia for public high school and public university in the mid-to-late 90s.

Given the revelations at the senior levels of Virginia government today, you know racism in Virginia wasn’t unusual decades ago. Racism wasn’t a constant ubiquity, but I did experience some type of racist encounter about every 10th time I went out of the house.

One of the more milder examples was while waiting in line to go to the bathroom at a gas station off I-95 heading south. A white guy behind me said, “Hey, don’t you understand English? What are you waiting for? The bathroom is open!“

I turned around and said, “There’s actually someone in there. They just didn’t lock the door. Do you understand the English that’s coming out of my mouth?”

He backed down with an “Oh, never mind.” But I was ready to rumble.

The amazing thing about all these racial experiences is that it’s all I knew after coming to America for high school.

I thought it was normal to be on the receiving end of racial slurs or racial innuendos every so often. I just endured and fought back as hard as I could each time.

Yes, I got suspended from school multiple times for fighting, but it was worth it to defend my honor. Kids stopped messing with me once they felt my fists of fury.

After I got a job in 1999 in New York City and again when I moved out to San Francisco in 2001, I realized that being a minority in America felt so much more comfortable in a diverse city.

My racial conflicts dropped from every 10th time I went outside to maybe every 25th time I went outside in Manhattan. In San Francisco, I can’t remember my last racial conflict because we are a minority majority city.

One of my biggest worries as a parent is whether I’ll mess up my son’s life by sending him to private school instead of public school. I’m fortunate enough to have a choice. But sometimes, more choices mean more headaches and possible wrong decisions.

I went to an international private middle school when my parents were stationed in Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia as US foreign service officers. The cultural experience was amazing.

But I was also surrounded by a lot of extremely wealthy kids who had drivers and mansions in the hills. There was a innate aura of privilege that I was apart of which made me lazy.

My friends had parents who either owned successful businesses or held high paying jobs. Many of my friends didn’t study very hard because they knew that through their parents’ connections, they would get choice jobs after graduation. That, or they’d simply get a job at their parents’ company and eventually take over the business.

After four years in Malaysia, I came to the US for high school and attended a public school. Public school is where I learned to become more independent and how to deal with many of life’s realities.

In the US, some of my high school friends lived in government housing. I had to fight back against bullies and find ways out of hairy situations more times than I can count.

In high school, I got suspended a couple times for fighting back. Some of the kids I hung out with smoked, drank, and shoplifted. I sometimes did the same.

The cast of characters was much more diverse in public school than in private school. But they were a closer reflection of society once I graduated.

I’d like to think that attending public school is what made me into a gritty person who never backs down from conflict. I want to believe coming from an underdog status helped me fight harder to achieve financial independence.

After college, I always used to carry a chip on my shoulder that motivated me to work harder in banking because I had attended a public university instead of an elite target private institution like many of my colleagues.

Without a financial safety net, for me, it was either drown or swim across the ocean to the promised land.