Why Do Women Go Out With Deadbeat Losers?

Why Do Women Go Out With Deadbeat Losers?

Men are dogs. If you give us an inch, we'll take a mile. But, if you put us on a leash, we'll gnaw it off and go even more crazy once we're free. There's a fine balance between loving your man and smothering your man. The question some people have is: why do women go out with deadbeat losers?

There are countless posts online where women complain about their deadbeat boyfriends for never paying for anything, never buying them gifts, always playing video games all day long while still living at home in their parent's basement, and never holding on to a job for more than a year to save their lives.

Yet, these women still latch on, hoping they'll one day change their man for the better.

It's just so weird that with a male world population of 3.5+ billion, a woman would settle for a deadbeat loser. Then agin, deadbeat losers are everywhere.

Reasons Why Women Go Out With Deadbeat Losers

Settling for a deadbeat loser is like settling for a job you hate. There are way too many people who hate their jobs and keep on doing them, just like there are way too many women who settle for men who treat them poorly.

What is it about non-ideal situations which makes us keep carrying on, doing nothing to change? If you hate your job, get laid with a nice severance check in hand!

My theory is that in the beginning, most women don't know the guy is a deadbeat loser. He probably is reasonably attractive and tells a good story about his current situation and his ambitions. Obviously, he will be on his best behavior during the wooing process.

It might take one week, or it might take many months. But until a consummation is made, guys can be very charming! By the time a woman hooks up with the guy, only afterward will she see his true colors.

Her “oh, shit” moment comes at a time after she's given everything to him. As we are generally all optimists, a woman believes she can salvage the relationship and change him for the better. Unfortunately, no matter how hard she tries, she can't teach a gorilla how to put down the toilet seat, pay for dinner, and write her sweet notes of nothing.

It's too late, and eventually, the relationship fades.  In retrospect, every woman who has gone out with a deadbeat loser realizes the case. “I don't know what I was thinking“, is a phrase that always comes up.

Why Women Settle For Deadbeat Losers

Let's review all the reasons why women go out with suboptimal guys. With billions of men out there in the world, why settle?

1) We don't believe we are worthy.

Above all else, I believe that the reason why we settle for someone suboptimal is because we believe we aren't deserving of more. This is utterly disappointing and ludicrous. You don't deserve to be mistreated or taken advantage of ever! You deserve to have someone love you back as much as you love them. 

Those who ask for promotions get promotions. You must adopt a growth mindset to build wealth and get what you want. If you don't believe you deserve to be with someone, you probably won't be.

2) We're afraid to be alone.

Life isn't worth living if there's nobody special to share it with. I'd rather be a median waged person with a loved one than be a lonely billionaire in the long run. It's irrational to think that you will die alone given the population of the world today. Every day, we have the opportunity to meet a hundred people if we want to. It just takes initiative.

3) We think we can teach a dog how to speak.

If there are five “must haves” such as humor, compassion, motivation, spontaneous, cultured and he has three out of five, the temptation is to settle. Perhaps over time, you believe he'll be able to develop the other two must haves and be that ideal guy. 

You'll be able to change him for the better, which is hardly ever the case. The problem with this thought process is that he might actually lose one of the three must haves, and then you're really going to feel bitter for wasting your precious youth on him!

4) We're afraid to get hurt.

If we never try meeting other people, we will never get rejected. It's truly disheartening when someone else doesn't show you the same interest as you've shown them. Guys get rejected left and right because for some reason, society has told us we always have to initiate.

Rejection doesn't get that much easier to deal with after a while. Instead, we settle for what we have or just being a lone. That's sad, because time isn't on our side. The older women get, the smaller the pool since women refuse to be with men younger than them, whereas it's everything goes for guys!

5) We're losers ourselves!

I never thought about this until readers kept on mentioning that deadbeat women tend to go out with deadbeat men. Society always sees men as losers, and women as misguided. I guess there is equality for all, after all! Read the 175+ comments so far on this post with fascinating perspective from both men and women.

“All The Good Men Are Always Taken”

One of the best excuses women tell me for not wanting to be with an attractive guy who has all she wants is that she's afraid she won't be able to hang on to him. She's afraid other women will be all over him, which will seriously stress her out. She's also afraid as she grows older, he'll stop wanting to be with her. Deadbeat losers don't change much.

But here's the thing ladies. Men's libido's decline the older we get. It's the friendship that we cherish more of, not the sexual activities, the older we get.

Not wanting to be with the hottest and nicest woman possible is hard for men to understand. We men think that it is better to have love and lost than to have never loved at all. Guys also love it when their woman gets all the attention from other guys.

I guess it's because guys ignorantly believe their women will never cheat on them. Of course, we all know women cheat on men as much as men cheat on women.

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Try To Find A Better Man

Because there are likely millions of people who wish they had better, you have really no fear of never finding someone you're compatible with. One way to improve your potential for finding someone is to develop a better personality.

Online dating sights have increased your probabilities 10 fold thanks to just several clicks of a button, you can search for that compatible someone. Compare the scope now vs. 20 years ago. It's night and day!

Settling is such a weak thing to do. It screams of insecurity. You have the right to be happy because someone out there will truly value who you really are!

Seriously, it doesn't matter how much money you have if you don't have someone to share it with. If you don't have a love partner, I highly recommend you spend more time working on finding a great partner.

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Why Do Women Go Out With Deadbeat Losers is a Financial Samurai original post. Finding the right person to share your life with is so important for living a happy life. Don't settle!

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524 thoughts on “Why Do Women Go Out With Deadbeat Losers?”

  1. Dead beat losers is what many women want in life?

    Especially the gang bangers, street thugs, schemers, drug dealers, and those with professions that are financially because they feel protected by them.

    The working man these days are not an option for many women, nor is he ever given the respect for being first responsible for himself, because he doesn’t exactly fit the bill for ghetto life.

    But, in contrast to that, a professional woman would feel the same as he isn’t fit for her life, and with these scenarios of lifestyle the essentials are not good enough, and they both will only look down on and away from him!

    However, I have no problem with what I do for a living, with who I am, and what I’ve achieved physically, mentally, and financially, the things essential for life.

    But, to my relief, I stay away as well, and Keep my eyes open with a great outlook for a woman whom has good wisdom to know real substance, and what is essential to create a solid and strong loving relationship…

  2. Today unfortunately just so many very uneducated entitled stuck up women nowadays that really think their S— doesn’t stink.

  3. Women back in the past were certainly a lot smarter and much nicer to meet as well which today most women are very entitled low life stuck up losers altogether.

  4. Speaker Of The Truth

    Just so many very entitled brainless women that are everywhere nowadays just like a disease that can’t be cured.

  5. No Doubt About That

    Most women back in the old days were certainly a lot more nicer and smarter than the kind of very dumb stuck up women we have now.

  6. Look it’s not about “settling”.
    Women don’t settle, what the loser guy lacks, they will get that from other supplies, like money etc.
    What it is really about is : “He does what I say”
    That is what all of these narcissistic women want.
    They get money from other supplies, they can get much more attention from other supplies, why they keep this loser guy is because he is already a loser, to his POV, he thinks if a girl loves me when Im a loser she must really love me, all of this happening while he is literally her puppy doing everything she asks.
    Yeah he might be playing video games etc, but more often than not he listens to her, he does what she says, just wait until this loser starts improving himself, taking control of his life, doing what is best for him, when that time comes, this woman will be the first to try to leave him because now things start getting clearer to him, now he will start finding out about all her affairs behind his back, and how he was such a dumbass to believe that she really loves him. There is no such thing as love, love is only an excuse guys/girls make to get something else that they want, the only real thing is commitment, when someone can commit without getting anything from you, that person will stay with you for your whole life, and eventually you will fall in love with them even if you hated them at first.

  7. I’ve been married now 30 years we both settled their wasn’t anyone else please I don’t care what people think but I do believe in God and we both know maybe their is someone else but neither of us gonna spend our life alone God says no. I know so many people alone bitter. My spouse don’t take care of himself etc etc etc so what we are two imperfect people trying to enjoy life. And speaking of life I have things in my heart about certain men their are two men in my heart I won’t mention it’s in my heart and I’ve told everyone you have zero right to interfere and you don’t tell me who to love. Also one man after 20 years I approached him and praised his very being because you never know and if I die tomorrow I want him to know if I divorce I want him to know and I don’t bother him ok. I also have a friend and I have very few men friends it’s not allowed but he offered me his paycheck to sleep together and God bless him too he shares his love to me for me he isn’t a bitter man. And just for the whatever the men I find most attractive are a mess. Amen and May God Bless us all with true love that is everything .

  8. Many men are bitter and looking for a man to complete them. Well sweetie look inside become a man that will complete you than admit to certain women you fancy you are interested quit expecting women to be men otherwise your going to be divorced and unhappy in 10 years cause you will live with a women man and get it and furthermore most women don’t see men with issues as losers and if you get off on seeing women as sloppy seconds or used up well you’ll get what you deserve in life old bitter alone spouting garbage on these sites

  9. Because to really understand someone it takes time and let’s face it women are not perceptive they are taught by society these things selective qualities mean it’s a good thing. No women ever goes down to the nitty gritty and ask themselves hey does this make sense on a psychological level they just jump to stereotyping. Men do things for reason and that’s all image. The guy that puts on the gym time and looks at himself while he’s flexing doesn’t care about who u are he’s trying to get what he wants which isn’t even remotely close to who u are on the inside. Pleasure distracts. I’m sorry to say this but social media and the sht u see on TV isn’t supposed to teach u a damn about happy endings or compatibility. it just sells tickets…. U wanna good man look for a man that loves others and cares enough to put others ahead of himself not some punk whose putting all his attention on trying to prove he’s worthy. That’s what scams are. Women are the prime target for pyramid scheme and marketing because they use their emotions to decide on what they want which is easily manipulated. True beauty isnt skin deep stop slapping on make up and wearing thongs and pushup bras… The truth hurts and the guy that loves u will tell u wat u need to hear… The guy that eggs u on and pushes ur buttons to get u to do what he wants doesn’t. He just cares about his needs. Bad men aren’t bad they just have their own agenda and they don’t give a sht about who u are for u. How can u expect someone to know u if u won’t show urself. Flaws arent a bad thing they are the whole picture stop trying to be perfect ur not giving ppl a chance to even see u for the real u. U want someone that loves I for ur true beauty try spending a year connecting with someone on a deeper level…. Our body’s are just shells and as long as we use that as a way judging others and ourselves we will always be disappointed. Chances are u have clue to who he is and he has no clue to who u are and that’s because the whole dating approach doesnt give shts… It was sht that’s easy and prioritizes instagratification. For a starter stop putting out… If he can’t love u without the sex clearly he doesn’t like u for u. I’m sorry but that’s the bottom line. If u have a real best friend I know what I mean
    .

    1. This was an incredible straight edge knife cutting straight to the issue and addresses the condition directly while pulling no punches. marvelous comment.

  10. Because.
    Some women have no self esteem.
    So they settle for a dollar bill, a
    Little fat le man.
    One thing I would never tolerate!

  11. Money Over Women

    As a man, here’s a viable solution to this whole dating thing: don’t date! Make your money and live your life, and go for one-night stands (always wear a condom). If a decent woman comes along, maybe date her. But don’t waste your time on women, since most can offer little more than what’s between their legs. IMHO and experience.

    1. Maybe the villainous dead beat loser maligned in the article has something really amazing between his legs and is skilled at using it. The article didn’t even go there. If he’s that good in bed, that could definitely be an answer to this article’s titular question.

  12. Most women nowadays are very complicated as it is, very stuck up, have mental problems, Curse at many of us single men for no reason when we will try to start a conversation with them, real narcissists, gold diggers, and that list just keeps on growing. I am a good looking man that keeps in great shape, and i have a very good personality as well. And i still have trouble meet a good woman today, which i will never understand at all.

    1. Only in America buddy. I’ve met women from Japan and Vietnam and Germany that really know how to treat a man. If she likes you she shows it not like the self centered dykes we have in the USA. Women are told since a young age that they are princesses and deserve it all. When they finally enter the real world they are no longer the Princess of the house and most women, these days feel that they can do just as good as a man, which unfortunately for them is not true. Men are more resilient and able to understand that they are not the King of the land. Unlike most women who hold on to illusions of her Royalty. Pathetic. It’s a codependent psychosis at best mitigated by the dream and perpetual searching for the grass that is greener that will eventually just die because you’ve trampled all over the lawn.

      1. Women over there are a lot more normal compared to America that has the worst low life loser women nowadays over here unfortunately, which most of them really are since they’re very rude, nasty, narcissistic feminists as well.

      2. Jahn, American women are pieces of garbage the way that i look at it, compared to most of the women back in the past that were the very complete opposite of today and real ladies as well. Most of these women today are either gay or bi to begin with, and never straight at all.

      3. You know what’s crazy too? Now, women are complaining about something that has been called “golden penis syndrome.” Since men only make up 40% of college graduates now, women are complaining that men are lazy, don’t put much effort into dating or their own appearance, etc. Also, in Manhattan women say it is even worse, because the ratio of college educated men to women is exacerbated since 9–12% of men in Manhattan are gay… Funny thing about this is… the feminists caused all of these to happen and it’s all backfiring on them now.

        1. Feminism is much worse than cancer that is caused by these pieces of garbage women, for which there is no cure for this very horrible disease either.

    2. Wendy Anderson

      Maybe your good looking man in great shape with a very good personality is loving himself more that it seems you could love anyone else… Jus Sayin’

    3. There’s a lot of people of both genders who are complicated, stuck up, and have mental problems (I’m a female and my mom regularly accuses me of finding men with mental problems sexier and more attractive than those who don’t). Admittedly, when I was married I was uptight and strange and progressively less and less happy. As a woman, I think the ladies who curse and get rude/unpleasant with men who approach them, she’s insecure and possibly thinking, I’m going to reject him before he rejects me. Maybe you need to reassess the places and change the places you go if you are only meeting hostile frustrating ladies there.

      1. Most women i would say though back in the past which it was never ever about looks and wealth when looking for a guy to have a very serious relationship with, and now they want the money making men with the very big bank accounts with the 6 pack abs since a great deal of women nowadays as it is are very high maintenance and narcissists too. Very pathetic dumb women nowadays that lack a lot of intelligence and have no manners and personality at all either when it comes to many of us single guys looking to very seriously trying to find love today. And the very sad thing for many of us guys is that there aren’t really any good places to go to meet a good woman today that can just accept us for who we really are even though we aren’t rich.

        1. “can just accept us for who we really are even though we aren’t rich.”

          You are just as much of a deadbeat loser as the rest of them.

          1. yankees992012

            Still bumping the thread, lol

            Jason is right. Unless your young and able to get a legal age girls. That’s where the best girls are. Good guys don’t want women who been around the block or better yet the “whole world” see the woman naked. Self respect remain high on the list of what guys looking for. Women today are very low quality and nothing good come from it. Jason has it on point of what women really is like in 21st century.. In fact it a lot worse now than let’s say 30 years ago?

          2. Martha, sounds like you really are a total loser yourself not to mention how very severely mentally retarded you really are.

            1. I didn’t even realize that I was fishing for deadbeats.
              Goodness what a big catch of deadbeats I have.
              Accountability and self awarenes are nonexistent in your lot.

      2. Katzilla, There are really no places for many of us single guys to go to meet a good woman today at all unfortunately.

  13. WallStretcher

    A chunk of this article is complete b.s. Women want a challenge. Point blank period. They also, deep down lust for pain and abuse to varying degrees (some want a little, others want a shitton). Why do you think so many like the get spanked, chocked, etc. in bed? The challenge is a form of abuse. Some women chase after guys who beat em (this is why some stick around or go back after “leaving” because this is what the wanted but will never admit to it). Others are genuinely stuck and tryna get out. They also chase after the dude who looks like he either gets a lot of “wet- wet” regardless if he is good in bed or not or the guy who looks like he is so good in bed he will turn her out. Thats it.
    At minimum a guy who is getting laid consistently by different women who is a bit of a challange is gonna get some sexual and some women
    At most a guy who is the sh1t in bed and will always keep her on her toes because he is that much of a challenge to her and roughs her up a little (not necessarily in a harmful way, but rustles her leaves to keep some form of friction or “drama” going in their “relationship”) is gonna have women slickly or even some brazenly tryna give him the panties. Plenty will say this that and the third but actions speak louder than words. Most will never reveal how they feel or what they do in the dark…EVER!

    1. What makes you think thatbJason is a deadbeat loser?

      However Martha, I’m a working man looking for what Jason is looking for in a woman, but, you just lost it on his and my standards of a woman deserving respect, having good qualities, with family values.

      I know Martha that our standards may be a bit too archaic for your taste, but I can remember when families were more stable, with people really caring and looking out for one another.

      Well now Martha, do you believe that (Shame) has become a Dirty Word?

  14. “Guys also love it when their woman gets all the attention from other guys”
    NO. NO. NO.
    i have no problem if a man shows interest for my girl (it s not that i like it neither) BUT I DO CARE if my girl gives that attention back… then i got some problems with my girl, the third person got nothing to do with me

    i wont stop a guy from showing his interest to my girl. that s normal.
    but i will stop dating her if she falls for another man/girl. thats obvious

    “My theory is that in the beginning, most women don’t know the guy is a deadbeat loser.”
    CMOOONNNNN, that could happen to 1 in 1.000.000
    but MOSTLY girls choose deadbeat man for many reasons:
    she is the same or worst than him
    she cant take a better man
    she fall for the looks
    she is afraid to be alone and has not secured a better man yet
    (some girls try and fix a man, but those are the minority if they are dating a deadbeat man
    most girls “Trying to fix” a man.. are girls that are datin a succesful man that cheats on them and is not afraid to be with many girls as possible. MANY GIRLS PREFER TO SHARE A TOP GUY THAN TO SETTLE FOR A NORMAL GUY)

    “Settling is such a weak thing to do. It screams of insecurity. You have the right to be happy because someone out there will truly value who you really are!”

    yeah, with super high standards and HIGH ego yeah.. lowering them sounds like weakness
    right?
    JUST STOP CHOOSING IMPOSSIBLES if u are a normal girl and u happened to catch the best man out there.. CARE FOR HIM cause he can choose any other girl if he wants (if u think that u are at the same level or stop giving him what he needs he will dump u)
    girls from the 2021 dont want to be with a guy at their same level and grow a couple from there.. they want the succesful man to love them..
    the probability of finding that man is scarce and MOST woman wont.

    1. NicoIas, I agree!

      But a person who starts from the bottom appreciates it when he reaches the top?

      However, a person that starts on top, usually feels entitled, and will never appreciate or be satisfied at achieving a relationship, the people around them, and within themselves, not anything he or she encounters…

  15. Too many women are too caught up in the knight in shining armor image of men. After all, how can a guy protect a woman and her kids unless he is perfect?? Truth is that 1 in 8 men according to RAINN are sexually abused in the the United States, and others suffer horrific trauma as kids. A counselor is not going to cure all these problems. A guy needs a romantic woman to be able to listen to him, understand him, and make an attempt to assist him in a way that will not detract from her own growth as a lady.

    1. Good and helpful insight here. Real communication, human to human, rather than sex- stereotyping and blaming.

    2. what hurts me the most is male victims aren’t taken seriously,and it’s sickening and heartbreaking to say the least.

      1. Conversely, females can point the finger and the accused is considered guilty before evidence is provided. I am a liberal woman and I declare this is illogical and unjust. The Salem witch trials were this sort of lunacy.

        1. yankees992012

          Oh please, America has become an ultra-conservative society. The word rape is so foreign to them that the courts around the country turned a blind eye. Have you heard the expression “2 steps forward 1 step back”? That’s what’s happening in our legal system here in America.

          1. Rape as a criminal charge against a female first count most likely carries 10 to 20 years yeah I’ll compare that to a child molest station charge which would usually fall under you indecent deviant sexual intercourse on a minor average 5 to 20 years so you tell me why if your adult raves of female adult he gets more time than raping a minor how does that make sense not in all cases but I myself have been leave convicted felon and incarcerated for 14 years and I’m done several Terms to acquire the number 14 however you see it all and I believe the reason that we you’re so lenient on child molesters compared to adult rapists is because that we got this notion that oh they got a mental disorder no they don’t have a on this order well they do mean that with anybody who is attracted to a child has got a mental disorder and in my opinion it’s their preference kind of like homosexuality in my opinion it’s also a mental disorder however it’s their preference and that is why ciao molesters reoffend compared to the rapist so that’s all I got to say before you start speaking maybe you should know A little bit of the inside scoop instead of listening to CNN and I was that Mitu movement has done is open the door for false accusations

            1. Brittany Ritenour

              yes but not all “Felons of Minor Dievant Sex” Are Actually Child Sex Offenders! Sometimes they could have just turned 18 and been with someone 4 years young and they’d still be looked at as a child molester! I know someone who got put in prison for this and He is NO Child Molester! But Now He can’t be around other kids, or kid areas, and all this stupid stuff. He is attracted to adult mostly adult men, not kids! But people will forever look at him as a child molester! Mean while real child molesters sometimes end up getting the least worst sentences which is very odd anyways. Referring to another sex offender I knew. The least sex offender got a even worse charge then the “Bad Sex offender did”. Bizarre, just because it was “Homosexual”. So some how butt sex with someone close to your age is some how worse then a 20 year old having sex with little girls. Kind of bizarre. Anyways the system doesn;t always charge accurately in my opinion. As he is charged as the worst criminal ever, and he would never murder or steal or do anything dangerous to anyone. Other then being flighty at time and some other stuff that non criminals get involved in, he really isn’t in my opinion a true criminal but here he is charged like a murder? Yes People often treat sex offenders worse then murders, and not all but most sex offenders are often the most harmless humans in every other way, so they make them work in the back of kitchens and janitor, exactly where they can continue to molest others, if you really want to stop sexual abuse from a sex offender just put them in the middle of public give them something to do to focus and feel proud of, as not like most sex offenders would touch someone in the middle of 20 other costumers, like come on.

        2. Our justice system has lost it site,focus, empathy,everything. Only thing that’s going to revive that and this country is shit can everything and follow the Constitution! Like now!!! Drop everything for 3 days and post,read,and follow it. Then you will see what I do then get a Gideon Bible and go to the index look up injustice,pride,prejudice,etc, it even gives you the solution. And later the court yard or court rm has to be in the church. Only way will be judged properly and see what 2-8 percent of us so called losers, deadbeats,who gave ven

    3. MEN ARE DOGS LMAO
      TO WRITE AND START THIS TO HELP GIRLS ABOUT GUYS I THINK IT WAS WRITTEN BY 5 LESBIANS WHO ARE WHITE SUPREMACIST AND ALSO MEN HATERS. LOL THIS IS THE MOST CHILDISH RUDE AND BITCHY STORY TO BRAINWASH THE NAIVE BY MEN HATERS AND BE ASHAMED YOU EVEN THINK MEN ARE DOGS. MY 5 YEAR OLD NEWPHEW COMES UP WITH GREATER MEANINGFUL STORIES DAILY. YOU MUST HAVE SOME SERIOUS ISSUES.

      1. MGTOW For The Win

        Speaking of Lesbians, they’re everywhere these days. And real men haters obviously. Not to mention that they have tattoos all over their bodies, and overweight altogether which makes them real nasty as well.

  16. Lets not forget the party girl who after sleeping with dozens of guys and reaching 30 all of a sudden wants a nice guy. It’s like getting a used car with 200k miles on it.

    1. And That Is Fact

      Those slutty women will just grow very old all alone with a bunch of cats when their time comes, especially when there many of us real nice single guys that would really know how to treat a good woman with a lot of love, respect, and commitment. Women today are just so very awful, and not nice to meet at all.

    2. Why would she be required to disclose this her romantic partner? Then there is also the flip side of this, her experience would probably make her more skilled in physical intimacy than someone who had say, three or four romantic partners. Why are you assuming that none of the men she was with previously were “nice guys?”. Maybe it’s just me, but I really don’t understand where you are coming from. Don’t shame people for having a libido and acting on it.

      1. This can’t go unaddressed. The way God designed it, was Adam and Eve: one man and one woman, for life.

        A man and a woman, when they marry, are supposed to not have had sex with anyone. They are both supposed to be virgin. And only give their virginity to each other, on their WEDDING NIGHT.

        Anything short of that incurs damages, which deprive them of the design created by God. They learn about each other sexually and grow from there.

        That’s how it works best. That’s how God designed it. It’s a fallen world unfortunately.

  17. I will never understand women. I am 35 years old and still single, never been married, don’t have any kids. I am good looking, well educated with three college degrees, and have a good paying job, however no woman seems to want me. I tried everything to find a woman internet dating, bars, church, the gym and I talked with a lot of women and some even agreed to meet up but after the first date they would say well your just not my type, I’m just not interested, I just don’t feel a connection with you even though they seemed interested when I first meet them. I guess Im too ordinary. Most women today like bad boys and losers. An example is when I worked at Pizza Hut about eight years ago. We had this pretty girl in her early twenties who dated our dishwasher who calls in sick half the time and is on the brink of getting fired. I could not figure out what she seen in this guy who could not even hold a job and does not even try to better himself?

    1. yankees992012

      To be a loser in order to get women is to learn how to talk like a loser. Act dumb most of the time. Don’t mention the college degrees and such. Women aren’t interested into that. Play bad boy type, act tough. Overall tailer the personality that the woman wants.

      1. You can not just become a Bad Boy.

        You either have it or not?

        I’m a working man, self reliant, good natured, Bad Ass with a Bad Mouth!

        But, that doesn’t even touch at being a Bad Boy…

    2. That is why most of these women today are very brain dead to begin with, and they treat most of us good men like garbage as it is since they have no manners and personality at all when they talk to us. They’re without a doubt very severely mentally disturbed, and need help very badly. Most women were so much nicer many years ago, and now they’re a total waste of humanity.

      1. I mean I am not saying the guy is a loser because he is a dishwasher. I was a dishwasher when I was in my late teens and early twenties while attending college getting my degree, but I worked hard and very rarely called in sick unless I was puking or had a fever. I would always work overtime if it was available too. However this guy was in his late twenties or early thirties and just didn’t want to work and wanted everybody else to do his job for him.

      2. Incorrect. You say women are braindead but if you feel that way then why do you even care who they date?

        Also treat most of us good men like garbage?

        There aren’t “good men” that call women brain dead. Sorry you just called out why you’re not a good man. Sure you may fake “nice guy” to get something you want from them but when it doesn’t turn your way you’ll lash out so you’re not a genuinely good person.

        Women were nicer years ago? No I think you remember what it was like to be a child and demanding attention that always got you noticed. Once you became and adult you have be what that specific woman desires and if you aren’t then she’s just not interested. Emotional labor of strangers is exhausting and women really don’t want to tip toe around men that clearly shouldn’t be approaching. Are you her looks match? If not then leave her alone and move on with the day.

        1. American Women Are The Worst

          Most women are real basket cases today altogether, especially American women. No manners, no personality, stuck up, Curse at many of us single guys for no reason at all when we will try to start a conversation with the one that we would really like to meet, What is up with that?

          1. This comment is exactly why women don’t like you. Personally, as a women, I would run far away from most of the men commenting on this. These “deadbeats” probably respect and love the girls they date, which is more than they’d ever get from any of the haters in the comments. Holy f*ck, I pray none of you find a women, ever. Just leave them alone for erernity, please.

            1. Blah, did you even read what the other man said? He said that women are Cursing at us for no reason at all which i even had it happened to me as well. Learn how to read.

    3. hey at least you didn;t get ghosted, they told you straight out you were not their type, In my case aftr 20 years of marriage husband passed, it was hard after his death but listen to this, after 3 years i decide to mayb go out with a FF omg big mistake i was not aware of all this playing around messing with people’s emotions for a month then i got ghosted which was a term that I recently learned. I was very embarrassed even ashamed, mayb i was too nice, guy didnt even said hey you are not my type, we learn from mistakes but i can tell you one thing i think im ok looking well mayb better than OK lol i cook, i am very proactive not a complainer, and still men run the other way. hey you are right about one thing women are drawn to bad boys i don;t knw why its a damn curse.
      i do feel alone at times i dont want to get married i don’t want to live with anyone i just want to have companionship NO one wants it i guess LOL
      it’s so hard too hard, it was easy when i was young imagine i got married at age 22… things were different back then men had more honor, now everyone just doesnt understand friendship and companionship YIKES

      1. Brittany Ritenour

        Good comment of course someone has to come along and be rude, but don’t listen to them. The person below that is bullying.

    4. You have three degrees and say “your” instead of “you’re”. Obviously the degrees were not in English!

      1. Ok, there was one slight grammar or spelling error! At least I am smart enough not to do illegal drugs, am able to hold a job and not be a lazy freeloader on welfare, and don’t have multiple children out of wedlock.

        1. Women — especially happy women who are comfortable with their bodies and enjoyable to be around — don’t like hyper-conscientious finger-wagging types. My advice is to stop constantly casting judgment about how other people choose to live, and to instead start offering something that women actually value.

          Women who are enjoyable to be around, socially skilled, and attractive understand the importance of emotional, social, and sexual value, and expect a man to provide the same value in return. If you don’t, they likely won’t want to date you. And don’t think you can pretend to be someone of emotional, social, and sexual value until you “get the girl”, at which point you can go back to being hypercritical, moody, uptight, melodramatic, prissy, constantly negative, and so on. Even if you trick such a woman into dating you, you’ll not be able to keep up the act forever, and when she sees who you really are, she will leave you. Probably for a guy that you think is “a loser”, but who makes her feel good, is fun to be around, and has masculine energy.

          If you want people to like you, then be LIKEABLE. Be FUN to be around. Make her feel good about herself and about life. Keep your negativity and drama to yourself. Be masculine in your behavior, don’t sniff like an old maid librarian who is offended that someone talked out loud, or put a book back in the wrong place.

          1. yankees992012

            That’s one way trip to prison, Maybe he-girl would like you in prison. With renew awaking happening in America. What your describing no longer exists.

            1. Huh? One way to prison? Umm no actually that comment above yours was spot on. Women enjoy being around fun and interesting men. A man that’s always doing that self deprecating humor is exhausting. It’s like they want you to make them feel better by constantly putting themselves down. You’re sitting there feeling awkward. The other type is the one that is constantly bringing up his sex life so that he lets you know he’s getting laid constantly. Then there’s the guy that tries to show you pictures of his exs. That’s usually fail number #3. The goal here is to say “see I had a few good looking ex gfs” but really the majority of the women they’re sleeping with don’t top those charts so I’m already creeped out because those women weren’t even good enough to mention and the better looking ones are being used as props way after the relationship had been over.

              Then there are the “neg” users. Everything feels like an argument when you don’t want to jump to their tune. They use alot of “WE this and WE that” as if we’re one person with one brain and clearly I’m not supposed to have my own wants or desires. I usually say ” Well it’s not WE” IT YOU OR ( ME/I) So I then have to go back and ask the question the way it should have been asked ” So YOU wanted ME to meet YOU some where? Is that what you’re asking ME?

              The other one is LET’S ( LET US) go here or go there. Again these are command prompts that are just annoying. I don’t even know that guy and he’s talking to me as if we’re one unit. If you want me to go and do something with YOU then ask ME directly.

              Then of course when I say Oh no I don’t want to do that then I’m met with hostility.

              So no there are just some behaviors that make certain men unappealing.

              Ohh then there are the 50-50 types. Seems all pro equality but it’s anything but. There’s nothing more unequal than the dating and mating between men and women. Sure if it was man with man or woman with woman I’d say there were closer to the 50-50 ideal but since sex between the “sexes” tends to put women at a physical disadvantage.

              So I’ll get the guy that’s pushy and wants to ensure a sexual victory for himself as something to acquire FROM women not enjoy WITH women. So what happens is he looks for the the cheapest way to get his goal met always often using “WE” for selfish self serving purposes. HIs suggestions are always ” lets hang out” as if I’m jut going to someplace and aimlessly stand around without a proper plan just because he want face to face attention but doesn’t want to do the work of actually of actually being responsible for well anything.

              So example:

              Guy said hey how about WE meet up at this restaurant. What that says is ” How about I arrive earlier to the restaurant, order my own food and eat it and finish just before you arrive so you can order your own food.

              What this says to me is that I should call the restaurant an hour earlier and order take out. Show up in sweats and when my food is ready to take I pay ,grab the bag and go home to enjoy a nice meal alone with some Netflix. You can call me on the phone and we can have a chat instead.

            2. Brittany Ritenour

              Actually I liked a guy who wanted to be a girl much more then average men, because he had qualities and could see things normal men couldnt and he was in jail. I loved him. So really, its your attitude that women don’t like. A “Masculine” Men is not the way to a girls heart.

          2. Brittany Ritenour

            Yes, what men don’t realize is , men sometimes also go after women who are “No Good because they Are Attracted to No Good Women, just like Women are Attracted to No Good Men!” There are guys out their that seek certian types of women who do not respect the kind of guy he is. Like i know some men who actually search for men who I know to be “B/tchy” And “Fighting Personality” That will never get a long with anyone, but These men like them because they think they are “Strong and Independent”, meanwhile they are nasty to other women and us women know they are not good dating prospects but some men choose these kind of women over and over again and they miss the good ones who actually like them because they didnt see the signs.

            1. Poormilllionaire

              The Danco worked pretty good, no choice but the two broke rommies enjoying all richness then F*off

    5. I was reading your comment and I think it’s pretty obvious why if you read how this article was posted. These men that are losers are con artists. They tell a good lie , blame others for their current predicament and you find out after investing time that you wasted it. So what happens is that women tend to keep trying because of that time invested thinking if they quit they’ll be missing out on the updated version that doesn’t exist not as long as he’s with her anyway. The fact that you’re talking about a pretty girl that while in her 20s dated the dishwasher over 8 years ago while you yourself worked for Pizza Hut is also telling. Were you as attractive as this woman in the male form? I gather not because you admit to getting dates with women but for some reason they don’t see you as their type. That basically means that looks/ interests don’t align enough for her to feel things will go anywhere. What I mean you don’t have enough in common + looks wise you may not meet their standard. That doesn’t mean you will not meet the standard of other women but the woman that you’re trying with just don’t feel it. Even that dishwasher, do you really think he was saying he doesn’t like work or did he play victim and say he was getting picked on or harassed at work which was why he never wanted to go into work? It’s all about phrasing with many men that are considered “losers” that say just the right combination of lies or use misdirection to keep her focus off of why he’ll a terrible match. These types keep pushing for their ends of things but don’t come with the other side for the woman so they keep her waiting for things to pay off. Think of this like a job. A man applies for a job, doesn’t have the skill set but lies on the application boosting himself up as the best employee. His mistakes keep coming up costing the employer money to the point where the employer is waiting for the benefits to reach or exceed the cost. Most companies would fire a person after so much time but women tend to stay in and try and make it work. Once the employee burns the business down or gets caught stealing from the register does the employer ( woman) say ok enough is enough. The difference here is business is about the numbers. With women it’s emotion which isn’t always based on logic.

      1. In 2012 times were hard the country was still in the recession and most places were not hiring except for places like Pizza Hut, Burger King, McDonald’s, Walmart, and fuel stations so I took whatever I could find, even though I already had my first college degree.
        As for looks I was quite goodlooking and still am, and I was in good shape. My looks would have been good enough for the pretty girl at Pizza Hut.
        Finally the dish washer was never picked on at least not at first, but after he was calling in sick half the time, always wanting someone to work for him, always wanting to go home early when he did rarely work, and never once working overtime once after we asked him dozens of times, everybody that worked there including myself lost respect for him. I could see a high school kid pulling this crap, but someone in their late 20s? Come on it’s time to grow up!

    6. Women don’t want bad boys, I am one in real life, I don’t just walk around in a fag leather coat with cheap knockoff sunglasses. I think it is more of the Fantasy that exists only in her head. Some insecure women find it interesting that some average dude with no particular set of strengths or qualities can just go out and be himself. This helps some women even take it to the next step herself! The level of comfort a woman has determines who she can be with. If you are a HighLander per say and she is a countryside chick she’s gonna naturally feel inferior to you but set her up with a peasant boy who disobeys you and she’ll even sell her ass for him on account that the big dog she can’t have somehow Lost in her warped sense of existence. You as a Greater Man need to search for a Greater Woman, you understand? Now stop looking for what you think you want and tell the women you do want how it is in the Highlands of life. Stop wimping over basic bitches and elevate yourself, the right woman Will recognize this. Then show her your dick,lol. Seriously exposing myself has Always netted some fishnet action,seen? Women want Dick, they’ve just been told it’s bad…so thy want to be good. IE, don’t worry baby I won’t tell. Just me and You baybeh etc. Bitches ain’t shit treat them as such that’s why you’re the Man. Later.

  18. Ever stop and consider how many women either aren’t diagnosed with autism or misdiagnosed as borderline personality disorder? Both my mother and I went through absolute hell with men only to find out later in life we had Asbergers which explains why we were so overly trusting of snakes in the grass. Women’s “liberation” was a mistake. We were sold lies. The women who thought they were fighting for their freedom were actually fighting for their “right” to wear men’s chains.

    1. Brittany Ritenour

      Yes True but Borderline and Autism are not the same. They are entirely different disorders and I think maybe im quiet borderline.

  19. Many of us “good Christian men” wanting a “good Christian woman” in church, particularly during college, were quickly disheartened when none of them would accept our requests for dates.

    Maybe we didn’t appear to be as “sophisticated” and say “all the right lines” the godless players used to get into the Christian girls’ pants. We may have been a little shy or introverted, and didn’t always know what to say to them.

    We never focused on sex and would do nothing to jeopardize a Christian woman’s purity. We wanted to date and marry them, not use them and quickly bolt, like the godless fornicators did.

    Read this story of a “good Christian girl” who threw-away her Christian innocence to this player she met. She could care less about the nice church boys who loved her. She only had eyes for the godless fornicator, whom she quickly gave him her sweet Christian virginity. She gave her Christian innocent to HIM — a player — and let him be her first, not the Christian man she may later marry. Wonder how those “church guys” appear in her eyes to her now, now that the godless player used her and soon bolted?

    [ link not added, from LoveShack.org forum ]

    “…some of them were “nice girls”. One girl who I deflowered was really sweet and innocent and the only girl around my age I know who went to church every sunday. Not brilliant, but she wasn’t dumb either. She threw her virginity away on me instead of all her male church-going Christian friends who were all in love with her, I never called her back once I got what I wanted. ….”

    1. This is a perfect case in point of what I was talking about. Women who are fun, enjoyable, and attractive aren’t interested in all this snotty, moralistic whinging. Such men are the partners of absolute LAST resort, women will take virtually ANYONE before they will go for the uptight, prissy, uptight finger-wagging man.

      And FYI, it is possible to formulate a sentence without using the word “Christian”. Just saying. :P

      1. It isn’t “snotty, moralistic whinging…” It’s fact as some/many “good Christian women” will give their virginities – their “Christian innocences” – to the nonchristian men they see.
        They will let them – not the “godly Christian men” they may later marry – be the first to penetrate the depths of their Christian innocences and let those godless men be the first to experience all the sensations that comes when deflowering a woman.
        Yet these same “Christian women” have the nerve to whine about a lack of “good Christian men” they can date. When those “good Christian men” tried to pursue them, they ignored them and only went for the “bad boys…”

  20. The Very Truth

    Just look at all the very fat disgusting low life loser women out there that really think they’re all that nowadays, what a real joke. This is why so many of us good single men can’t meet a decent normal woman anymore today.

    1. The_Hard_Truth

      My take on this Is simply women go for losers/bad boys because they are seen has having more confidence, they are more exicting, more dangerous to be around, ‘sexually appealing’ to women. Something a ‘good guy’/ ‘nice guy’ is not. A women in her sexual prime (round from 19 to 25) will of course be looking to hook up with what she considers the most sexually attracted men (will tend to be bad boys)

      Some of the comments on here from women can back this up. A bad boy is not going to commit to one lady simply because he has a string of women. He will go from one women to another with with no desire to commit. Why do you think women like chasing these and quite frank desperate for these types of men? Women like a man who has options with a lot of other ladies! To a women, having options means that you are most desired which places you at the top of the sexual market.

      What women can’t understand is that you cannot change/fix someone by trying to lock them down. It has to be that person who needs to change themselves. Women make the mistake of thinking this. This is why when they get to their late 20s, with their biological clock ticking, its then now they want to settle with a good guy. Simply because they been rammed by alot of these same men causing them to have high double digits body counts resulting with none of them committing. They eventually had enough. Again their clock is ticking and the sexual value decreases so to them it reaches the time when they need to settle down, get married and have children. A women’s SMV decreases alot quicker then men. Mens usually peaks around his 30s going into his 40s.

      What I also find assuming is when women post blogs, comments stating “Where are all the good men?” Guys please take this with a pinch of salt.. What she is actually saying is “Where are all the guys I am sexually attracted/ aroused gone?” If the former was actually true then most women at 30 and beyond will be taken and married. Its only when she probably reaches her mid 30s, when none of these bad boys no longer need her as they are sleeping around with women 10 years her age she will then start to seek a men who is respectful, got something going for him. Again look at all these blogs/youtube videos that women post regarding ‘Why I cant find a man’ or ‘Why I am destined not to find love as single mother for the rest of my life’

      Even guys with high value and have their shit together (are actually decent, respectful guys) do not want messed up women/single mothers. Again they have options and have their stuff together so will tend to look for good respectable women. If a man dresses well, conduct himself right, as ambition and drive (masculine traits) he will have his options with women. He does not want messed up used up women who been rammed by losers during her prime years.

      My last take on this. The women who do not want you during their sexual prime who are addicted to bad boys are usually the ones who have 3 children by 4 baby daddy’s, single and living of the government. They question why they cannot find a ‘good’ man… This is why they are the least desired women to date. To me, they are the equivalent of why women are put of by ‘Nice’ guys. It quite funny how some are stunned when they get a taste of their own medicine and are rejected by these same men (who now have their shit together) who they rejected during her best years.

      1. The Real Honest True Answer

        In other words, most women out there nowadays are just real low life losers altogether themselves.

      2. Actually what you state is the same statement that’s regurgitated in all forms of MGTOW spaces. Males that complain that women in their 20s rejected them but most of these men in their 20s didn’t have their lives together so they didn’t have anything to offer these women. The other issue is what these men that were so called “rejected” looked like in their 20s. Many times they don’t have the look, the personality, the resources nor the sex skills to attract women that quite frankly are far above their looks level. They know this but still want to approach women that will never find them appealing. Fast forward to later years when they actually get RESOURCES this doesn’t change their bitterness but they end up going out there to target the new young population of 20- somethings while being in their 30s and 40s. Now do they marry these women since they’re the new and fresh population of hopefuls? No. They treat these 20-somethings like trash thinking about their former selves and how they wouldn’t have gotten a woman like this in their past. So the unnecessary abuse begins as they seek to get revenge. These 20-somethings don’t understand the cruelty and abuse so they drop dating the creepy old guys and instead go back to dating men their own age that they can at the very least relate to and have actual conversations. They end up appreciating generational understandings as the older types typically talked down to them, brought great harm to their mental, sexual or even emotional well being and find men their own age a breath of air. In other cases they’ll use these revenge seeking older guys as financial toys seeing as they’re typically used as sexual ones. They just do an exchange as those resources can and will be used to further educational goals for career advancement. Once they’re on their way they go back to dating their own peer group to start building a family unit or they stay on the career track so they don’t need resources from any man much less one that will be extremely abusive.

    2. You don’t sound like a gentleman with your choice of words, I believe that is why you are not finding a nice lady. There is not a man I know that would describe a person with such negative disgust.

      1. Women today are so much different from the old days when love was very easy to find back then. Today women are very independent since they really can make it on their own which i will admit. Most women just want a man with money unfortunately, and just can’t accept many of us men for who we really are anymore.

        1. Billions of women form the low and middle class..i cannot believe how weak and stupid modern day men are.

        2. “Most women just want a man with money unfortunately”
          – Not true. They want men WITHOUT money. They want to be virtuous by sticking it to the man and donating their ss to the poor little but arrogant guy instead. Basically feminism.
          This article is about why women want loosers. Loosers are the ones who will never own a decent house, who will never provide a good life for 3 children.
          Some people mentioned women choosing for sexual attraction only. Maybe its ego they are attracted to, as they also have a big ego, as they were raised as daddy’s little princess. Arrogant people despise non-arrogant people, be it men or women.

          1. So, if you can’t even spell “loser” correctly, what kind of a guy does that make you?

            Protip: Looser is the antonym of tighter, not the antonym of winner.

            *rolls eyes*

  21. LOL @ the people in this thread and their skewed perception of reality.

    Look at the real world and tell me one girl who would f a loser who works at McDonald’s versus a wealthy surgeon with a retirement plan at age 70. Give me a break.

    This is why one-night-stands are the only thing going for us successful men. Who needs relationships, all that matters is the satisfaction of having physical sex and the ooochy-moochy romantic bullshit can be dealt with the deadbeats. We can f at least one night a week while devoting the rest of our energy to building our future.

    Who said winners can’t be assholes?

    1. You said F a looser not have a relationship with one. I am sure a fast food worker would normally young and strong and able to please a women. It’s just a F.

    2. A guy who ‘works full time’ whether McDonald’s or Walmart is NOT a Loser. The article is about the unemployed

      1. At least the men working at McDonald’s or Walmart work! I once known a young woman who worked two jobs while her boyfriend or guy she was engaged to sat at home and just drank beer all day long. He refused to work. He was the biggest freeloader there was. One time she hid $700 in a can or jar and was just saving it for a rainy day. Her boyfriend found it and spent it all in one night at the bar buying everyone drinks and this was not his money. This was money that she worked for and earned. This woman needed to tell the guy to go out and get a job or it’s over between them!

      2. No, you’re a loser if you’re a grown up working at these places unless you are a district manager or regional administrator. Male or Female you my friend are the weakest link

    3. That’s exactly why we date losers!! Your comment, right there! I’m an attractive 28 year-old attorney who excels in my field of practice. I’m intelligent, a great conversationalist, rational, and empathic. Granted, I’m also a bit narcissistic. So why don’t I date men in my league? Because men in my league don’t have an interest in dating or having a relationship.

      If he’s successful, intelligent, and doing well for himself – he either married his high school sweetheart, or currently has no interest in being in an “end-game” kind of relationship. Who can blame him? He has a biological imperative that makes him want to spread his seed. We, on the other hand, have a biological imperative to find one committed person and to become an incubator for 9 months. (Baby fever is real!).

      The point is, it’s not the 1960s anymore. There’s no longer a societal norm for getting married and starting families after high school or college. There’s no pressure to commit to someone anymore. So why would you, when you can manage yourself and see all kinds of women? The worst part of this all, is that this essentially means I’m better off looking for an older man in his forties who possibly IS looking to settle down. How unfortunate, lol!

  22. I am writing this comment with tears of joy. My marriage fell apart after 6 months because my mother In-law asked my husband to divorce me and marriage the woman she betroth to him as his wife. All this drama started happening in our marriage and my husband left me and our one month baby just so he could do as his mom wants him to

    1. Bobby Darrin Pritchett

      Well on another note, apparently he had reservations before the marriage but decided against his mother’s or his better judgement to go through his true intentions. Other than that, it’s unfortunate for a man to leave a marriage with a kid after going through the motion, that means he definately had reservations initially but “perhaps” look at what you may have coerced or inforced him to do so based on his initial feelings for you. You would do the same for a male child of yours be it a woman who’s pressuring him to marry her. Not saying you did, but it’s a strong possibliity. A lot of men are mothers boys and can’t shake or recognize or realize it. But for a man to do what yours did, means for you to look at any, however minute you may see it as a means to his action. Six months into the marriage and you have a child may come across as you trying to trap or in a marriage box him in. The next go around, I suggest you not try to compete with a mother, force or box in a man. If he’s that week to allow a woman to do so, then the same weakness will allow him to exit the marriage, child or not. I have “some” experience in what I say but I would never leave my child through marriage or relationship to be with another. Because what goes around comes around.

    2. Tears of Joy, I hope so because you should be second to none. Divorce is not easy and now he will share his earnings with you forever and new wife will not forget that. Less to go around, good for you now find things in life that make you really happy.

  23. A lot of these women will just grow very very old all alone with a bunch of cats when their time comes anyway. Have a lot of fun with your cats ladies, you certainly deserve it.

    1. Nothing is written in stone. You might end up in a ditch for any reason and need a therapy cat to get better.

    2. Going on Tinder is always illuminating for the number of unattached old men, with their sagging, wrinkled faces and pot bellies, desperately lying about their age and trying to appeal to increasingly fewer numbers of presentable women. Either that, or they marry some plain girl and try to cheat as often as possible (although that becomes pretty hit or miss as even the skanks avoid them after a certain age).

      I always wonder what happens when these 50 somethings hit 60 or even 70 and contemplate their future in the nursing home. They will probably turn into that cantankerous old goat that all the staff put off dealing with til last, the notorious one that they all laugh about for being so selfish and annoying.

      Personally, I think that a future with cats is a lot better than a carer ignoring that your bottom has been needing wiped for 3 days, because no-one is paid enough money to do that. Not for you at least…

      1. yankees992012

        As matter of fact, the dating world is totally opposite of what you’re saying. Young girls don’t want to be with their age group and find older men more attractive. I dont know what country your in, In US there’s no such thing as good morals.

      2. Bobby Darrin Pritchett

        Well, if what you say is true for men then it’s that many more women as their are men in the world who would fall in the same category. By nature and it’s undisputable, women require more attention and companionship in general. But like men looking for the attractive or going for the charming woman speaks the same for women with their superficial desires for men also. Which means it takes two to tangle and it takes a whore for a man to be a dog. And if that dog will age and end up with your perception of being wrinkled and pot bellied means that nature doesn’t discriminate on the woman’s being also. Women screw around just as much as men, and we cannot do so without a woman unless that man or woman prefers the opposite sex. Me, I only prefer and seek the opposite sex therefore one is no better than the other seeking satisfaction, looks and preferences whenever they can. As soon as women realize they cannot be equal without codeming or constituting men as the culprit and they the victim, then women should accept their role under the creator as who they were deemed to be, not under man’s or woman’s laws but under God and stop picking choosing the verses in their religon or bible that suites or appeases their needs or desires.

      3. Reality Check

        Nowadays there are so many low life loser Gold Digging women everywhere to begin with, and they really need to get a real job and stop living off older men with money.

    3. Often cats are better companions than grumpy old men who have sexual issues. We can support ourselves and with diet, exercise but if botox we still look pretty hot.

      1. Jeannie, all the exercise that you do still wouldn’t help either since you’re most likely very overweight to begin with.

  24. I’m definitely not ‘deadbeat’ – but from a relationship point of view, I fall into the ‘loser’ category – I’m 36 and have have never been on even one date. I don’t bother approaching women because there’s always a guy who’s more attractive than me after the women I’m interested in, so why bother? I’m well educated (4 university degrees), have a great, well-paying job in a cool profession, own my own home and 3 other properties – all debt free, take care of myself and have a lot of hobbies. None of this makes any difference though – I never approach women because there’s no way any would be interested.

    1. Paul, if you CHOOSE to be single and don’t want to date, that is great. But if you actually do, then why not try? Why bother? Well we KNOW the result of not bothering. But the only way to find out is to try. When you went after degrees and jobs you must have been prepared for possible rejections. And you modified your course and continued on. This is no different, I feel. If you already know that the worst that can happen is a “No” and you realize you are going to be just fine either way, then why not? Some might argue the worst thing would be getting into a relationship with the wrong person. They have a point. Communication is key. And remember, if you find you don’t like the person or they are not suitable, you can emd it. And I’m sure you would do it kindly. Best to you.

      1. yankees992012

        @ hsama, Oh please, Before i was married. Dating was bad then and even worse now. I hear alot of horror stories that women are going after men who dont respect women at all. It great that Paul chooses not to get involve with the drama of dating world. Women needs to wise up and learn before being used up. just my 2 cents

    2. Paul, you sound like you have it together. You don’t like to approach woman because you are afraid they will hit the “reject” button. So I’ll give you the button and take a chance by saying hi and I’d like to get to know more about you.

      1. Wanda Revak

        Paul, I would like to meet with you. I will not carry this automatic reject button you sadly think all women carry.
        Wanda

        1. Wanda wants to meet with you, Paul. Gee, I wonder if your mention of status had anything to do with her decision? You should claim to hate the people you seem to hate.

    3. Don’t be so hard on yourself. You sound amazing. You just need a woman who is not superficial. Maybe your just interested in the wrong kind of woman.

    4. Get out there Paul. Swing dancing is the best place. They’ll teach you, and a different woman falls into your arms every three minutes. Trust me, after a few weeks, one of them is going to resonate with you.

    5. Sadly your situation is not uncommon. Success in life does not equate to success in love. In fact successful guys might seem boring whereas deadbeat losers are exciting…they are always in trouble, hitting up their women for money. Women thrive on chaos and drama and that is what these losers provide. These women are warned by their family and friends but they don’t listen.

      1. Rosa, with the kind of very horrible women that are everywhere these days really tells the whole story.

    6. I’m a deadbeat loser (no video games but a lot of books) and I had very attractive and successful women do crazy thing to get my attention, some dropped their”successful boyfriend” hoping I would care more about them.Truth is to succed in today’s world you have to be a miserable cock sucker and bean counter. You can fool average people with luxurious items but not intelligent women who are already well established, they want somebody who make them feel alive which is pretty much the opposite of being successful nowaday. Something beautiful is something free and the money slavery is everywhere. Calling yourself a financial samurai or driving a sport car/boat and ingesting crap while jerking on irons in a gym doesn’t make you an athlete or a warrior, it just makes you a miserable loser who try to compensate. My father was verry successful financialy (real estate promoter) and the richer he became the more miserable his life was, he had plenty of expensive toys but he was surrounded by cock suckers who were waiting for crumble to fall off his plate.

      1. Clap Clap Quaddam.
        I see if often. Success and Money brings in fake friends who only want to post pics and name drop that they are part of your circle while talking behind your back. Trust is a huge issue for me.

    7. Paul I am a guy about the same age as you in the same boat and I myself have multiple degrees, own a nice car, own 3 properities, debt free, high credit score, one of which is in the largest city in America. I even look younger than I appear but I am not chiseled with washboard abs and i don’t have blonde hair, but I stay in shape and love the outdoors.

      I work in a STEM field that continues to grow that supports the operations of this country.

      Not trying to be picky, but I have a RIGHT to girls that are their 20s since I like to have a family and have healthy kids. I don’t want a supermodel but I don’t want a fat or hairy girl either. Or some girl with hair weird hair colors.

      The ONLY thing I desire from a girl is she is feminine, fit, sweet, kinky, and loves to travel and do outdoor things. Whether she cooks, honestly I am better at cooking than most girls but it would help.

      I don’t approach girls since none of them really look towards my direction or notice me and I am not sure how to interrupt someone on their phone or headphones.

      In the USA it is impossible to find the girls I like. Not sure why.

      1. You said “Not trying to be picky, but I have a RIGHT to girls that are their 20s since I like to have a family and have healthy kids. ”

        Why do you think you or anyone has a “Right ” to another human being? Do you think it’s possible your outlook is off-putting (terrifying) to women?

    8. Paul if it makes you feel any better your not alone. I am 35 years old and still single too. I have never been married and don’t have any kids. I am fairly good looking, well educated, and have a good paying job but no woman seems to want me. The women where I live seem to like bad boys who are in and out of jail and losers who can’t even had a job to save their lives.

  25. Whatever happened to the women in the past that most of them at the time were real ladies and the very complete opposite of today altogether? Today they really are just so very awful.

    1. I’ve only encountered tight fisted men with no respect for women. I’ve never had a man as much as buy me a meal or give a sincere compliment without an agenda. Women who sleep around are the ones men treat like treasure.

      1. Laura, all men want sex. You think a guy wants to be your buddy? No, we want a relationship, which includes sex. Maybe you should ask yourself why you’re so against sex.

  26. They go out with deadbeat losers because those are the only guys who ask them out. Smart men wrote women off a long time ago. Women add absolutely nothing positive to a man’s life. We are so much better off without them.

  27. Benjamin Jimenez

    I have said this once and I will say it again. If you are a woman who is looking for a long term, committed relationship partner with a man that leads to marriage, the first step in that process is to tell the man you are dating that while sex is important to you in a relationship, you do not engage in heavy physical intimacy with a man until there is not only commitment in the relationship, but a high level of trust, communication, and emotional intimacy. Period. No exceptions. Anyone who pressures you beyond that is history. Some idiot wrote a 250+ page book geared towards women about how to rid the players from their life, but nothing will rid a player than simply saying you don’t have sex outside of a committed relationship with trust, communication and emotional connection. Any player is going to dump you immediately if you draw this line because he knows that there are other girls who are more gullible. I can also tell you this with 100% certainty: if a man really likes you, and sees you as relationship material, he will wait for sex. He may not wait until marriage, but he will wait until at least the relationship has some sort of foundation. Besides, the key to having great sex in a long term relationship is communication. You have to talk about sex in great detail, and many people like myself are not comfortable doing this with someone I do not know well. As a man who is only interested in LTR’s, I will not have sex with a girl outside of a committed relationship. I really believe that couples having sex to soon in the dating process is responsible for a great deal of the divorces in this society. It is not a moral thing. It’s just that you are putting the cart before the horse. I don’t want to make sex sound like a big thing, but it is the most intimate act you can engage in with a person. It can do everything from giving you an orgasm, to giving you a STD to creating an baby. You don’t want to be doing this with a man who doesn’t know you and vice versa. I feel too many women in modern society erroneously feel that unless they give it up early, a man won’t commit. And I don’t want to hear about any of this “I must test drive the car before buying it” crap. “Buying a car” is what you do when you marry someone. I am not suggesting wait until after marriage to have sex.

    1. yankees992012

      I have to disagree with you here. If the woman had prior history of having sex then the woman would have alot to prove. Truest is very important in any relationship. If the woman really wanted commitment then it would be best for the woman to remain virgin to show the man that she actually respects herself. In US, we live in a very conservative society. I have to disagree with you in line of about any player would dump the woman. Respectful good guys would dump women who dont respect herself and serious about the commitment in relationship. Besides who want a prospective wife runs around the block before settling down?

        1. yankees992012

          Actually I am an american, and already married. I am merely speaking from experience. Even today it the same old, nothing changes.

        2. You’re naive.

          He’s right. If she isn’t a virgin, and is asking for absolute celebacy in the relationship short of marriage, it sets off numerous red flags to any self respecting man who might have understandable paranoia about the claims of chastity and devotion this person is making. It comes across as trying to have your cake and eat it.

          Honestly, any sensible man with a working brain would clock her at either gold digger, liar, or potential ex-wife. All 3 scenarios he loses time and money.

          1. yankees992012

            Sadly, your 8 years behind the news. With that mentality you have is the reason why non-virgins can never be trusted. Believe it or not, There are more women out there putting off sex until much later. I know for the fact that my current wife was a virgin when she had blood stains all over my bed, first time wasn’t really pretty. If i had to choose women like you or my wife, I would choose her at any time of the day.

    2. Why AREN”T you telling them to wait until marriage? Waiting to have sexual intercourse until AFTER marriage is the best way! It worked for the majority of people for centuries!!! And it shows the asshole is committed to you. Men dump you after you give them sex, you stupid women.

      1. In the old days people would get married after knowing each other for a 3 months. They weren’t dating for 2 – 3 years like they are today.

        There was no birth control and 1/3 of women died in childbirth. So basically after 3 kids you could get another wife.

        1. Where do you people come up with these bogus stats? They estimate a woman’s chance of death from birth in the 1500s was between 1 and 2% per child, not 33%.

          Infant mortality rates weren’t even that high

      2. Wow, waiting until your married. I only slept with my husband so I did not know what a “normal Sexual relationship was” said husband was not into “normal” things… marriage ended had I slept with him before hand I could have saved myself from divorce and heart ache. I am sure I am but the only person who experienced this. I no longer believe in keeping your virginity for your husband.

        1. yankees992012

          It appears that you picked the wrong guy to get married or lack of communication between you and your (former) husband. I would say it always good keeping virginity until after marriage. There are too many risks involved before marriage.

    3. I need a green light to move forward… Commitment and fidelity is that. But so many play the lie it is hard to tell any more as we have migrated into a population of sociopaths, narcissist amd just broken people. Good luck all. The Road Less Travelled just got bumpier since 1990.

  28. Hi everyone I’m Judy from Dallas County Tx., My husband who has left me for 7 months because of his new found mistress is back, We have been married for 14 years with 3 beautiful kids. I love my husband so much but I could not stop him. I need our marriage to work, I have read countless books on how to please your husband but none worked.
    I suffered alone with our kids until someone tweet on twitter about how she got his cheating boyfriend back and now they are married. I contacted her on twitter and she told me that I should give

    1. Matthew Moselle

      Bwahahahahahahahahaa. Yeah right, no intimacy? What?…. While she blows and screws someone else to get her but off, all the while pretending to be a virtuous martyr in front of you. GTFO of here with that nonsense. You people are mentally ill and full of $hit.

  29. MY 25 year old granddaughter loves SCUMBAG LOSERS. He was having her work and buy him food ,hotel, everything ( he was a street person, he has nothing) it was about sex and his your beautiful baby (she apparently has low self esteem) he could not even take care of his prior babies (deadbeat dad) his mother takes care of them. He has been hiding from the law I suspect it was about the child support. This guy is now in jail, he has her still sending him money in jail for cigarettes and stuff they are talking about 2 children when they both can’t take care of their children now. she spends her money and time with him not her 3 precious kids lays up on her mom and barely gives anything to her….mom takes her back and forth to work , feeds her, she cleans her and his clothes at moms but until mom puts her foot down it’s going to be like this. I know she just wants love but why creepy people. Her love should be focused on her babies. She must have a sickness she is bi -polar .She doesn’t appreciate anyone advice or help she has become a user herself…I wish I could take and raise those precious babies I’m too old for kids now in my condition. I am so very sad….thanks for letting me vent

    1. It is a real shame that most women today are just very horrible altogether, unlike years ago when most women were the very opposite of today.

      1. Yep, it’s the Princess Syndrome. I tried telling everyone in the late 90s, if you keep treating girls like A princess one day she will be in the real world and realize she ain’t shit, so now all the upper class men and lower class ones come out of the woodwork and it’s better to work with someone she can fix than someone who would need to fix her shit. That is the one trait that I admire is that most bitches Know they ain’t shit but you have people around you telling you you’re a Princess and you’re so special and blah blah fucking blah. It’s time for you dude on here to realize that most women ain’t shit, it sucks I know but I’d rather get sucked that be the sucker, seen?

    2. I so get you.
      My beautiful intelligent daughter has hooked up with Loser #1. Barely works..no car..no place to live so he moved in with her. He smokes weed 24/7….low intelligence and its sickening. I saw her thru meth addiction and abusive guys…now shes clean 3 yrs…went back got her college degree..is a nurse administrator and bought a new car. He mooches off her now for over a year. Shes afraid to be alone and settles for this ass piece of crap. He has 3 kids…who he doesnt support so hes in jail constantly.
      What the hell?
      She prefers ghetto type people but wasnt brought up that way…she hung with ghetto rats in high school and cant seem to shake it at 27…meanwhile her brother is premed going into grad school…
      They had an alcoholic abusive father who I left and put in prison…
      I guess she hates herself but why?
      Im sick I cant shake sense into her.
      All i do is pray and cry…omg

  30. Sandy Torres

    Money has NOTHING to do with LOVE. What this article should be about are the astonishing amount of women who dump amazing, loving, caring men because the parents and girlfriends are always crying about about how their daughter or girlfriend earns more than their boyfriend or husband. It’s 2019. Who the hell cares?!! Yes, I wouldn’t tolerate a BF who sits on the sofa, doesn’t have a job and drinks beer all day, but this stuff has gotten out of hand. The sooner we eradicate these gender roles and sexual stereotypes the better. They are totally destructive.

    1. There is nothing wrong with a woman earning more AT FIRST, when u are dating, but he has to have something going for himself! I don’t want someone who has had 10 jobs in 10 years. If he is getting ready to graduate from college, that’s one thing. If he lives with his parents or off of his parents, is into his 20’s and STILL can’t find a career and talks about childish hobbies all the time and displays no career ambition, that is the type that marries plain looking or less attractive women .

      1. yankees992012

        Unless, the guy took temps jobs, laid-off. In America, no jobs are secured and you can be let go at any given time. The pre-2008 arguments no longer valid for post recession era. That’s why the economy is booming in US because anyone is replaceable even you. Women and Men at least here in America knows this. This wont factor in dating relationship.

        1. I found much joy reading the comments more than the actual article. I am a confident, beautiful, intelligent woman with a successful career. Scary right? Let me tell you this powerful men will not wait for sex neither will they waste their precious time listening to a woman. Time is too valuable to them. “Ace” men don’t do well with rejection, emotions or suggestions. On the other hand loser men, we all know why they are. They are the brave ones that you can see from a mile away that have nothing to loose. They will try to woo a woman with “who they are, how much they have or what have they accomplished”. The list can go on and on. I yet to meet a kind, gentle, funny, intelligent and successful man. Please notice, I didn’t mention anything about physical appearance. So men out there, please stop blaming women for your lack in the relationship you all crave. I’m not planning to age with cats as someone have mentioned, hahaha. I am a happy single woman, I like to spoil myself, I love myself and I love my life.

          1. Stop over functioning for him. He feels your energy as begging for love. You will be attractive to him . When he knows you are happy with or without him. Be yourself . .

      2. Speaking The Truth

        It is very upsetting reading many of these stories about women going for loser guys all the time, and most of these guys are most likely very ugly as well on top of it all. And a good looking guy like me has a job and keeps in shape too, and i still have it very difficult meeting a good woman to date and have a serious relationship with. I don’t get it.

  31. http://www.the-niceguy.com/contributors/GoodMen.html
    Where Did All The Good Men Go?
    Satire by AldenHamil
    I am a woman of Generation Y, and I’ve just turned 29 years old. I’ve been looking for Mr. Right since I was 26 and there’s one little problem I keep running into: There are no Mr. Rights lining up to marry me! I know I’m not alone here, because I’ve seen plenty of articles on the Internet about women just like me having the same problem. I really don’t know what’s wrong with me, and why men aren’t more interested in me.
    I’ll admit… I’ve made some mistakes. Like most women of my generation, I grew up being taught that I could do anything I wanted, and that there’d never be consequences for my actions. I was always taught that I deserved the world, and that my entire life would fall into perfect harmony any time I wanted it to, including marriage, promptly by the age of 30. You see, being taught these notions as a little girl, I decided to do what most of my girlfriends did: once I got out of high school, I spent the next ten years “finding myself” by spending all of my free time chain-smoking cigarettes and getting drunk in bars and clubs. There were many men I got involved with during this period of my life. None of them were the wholeseome kind of men you could build a life with, but I didn’t care. I wanted action. I wanted excitement and drama. I knew those men never cared about me and only wanted sex, but I gave it to them anyway. Some of them hit me, and a few smashed in my car windows, but whatever.
    There were a few really great men who came into and out of my life during this period, usually from outside the bar scene. They were men who really cared about me, who were concerned for my well being, and who did the little special things to let me know they cared, but I ignored them. I did, I’ll admit it. Every man who came into my life who displayed these positive traits – the kind of traits that could have led to stability and happiness – I rejected. I found them boring. Honestly, I was having too much fun with my lifestyle to ever take notice of the men who actually treated me like a human being. I was addicted to promiscuous sex with bad boys who never loved me. Most of my girlfriends were the same way. Why settle for a good man before you have to, right?!
    Now I’m 29 years old. I only drink on the weekends, and I’ve curbed my smoking somewhat, but it’s taken a real toll on my body. My looks are fading, and my biological clock is ticking. I am a single mother of one child born out of wedlock to an abusive, no-good father who never loved me or even had a relationship with me. Not that I wanted a relationship – he was just some guy I met in a bar and I liked how he talked to me like I was dirt. What can I say, it made me hot. He’s currently in prison for armed robbery, so he’s not coming back for another eleven years.
    I guess it helps to know that I’m not alone in this. Nearly all of my girlfriends made the same decisions I made, and we’re all having trouble landing quality, marriage-minded men now that we’re getting older. Where did all of those good men go? Didn’t they realize that all we needed was a decade of promiscuous, no-strings-attached sex with non-committed, low quality men, after which we’d be ready to “settle” for a decent, stable man and a house with a white picket fence?
    I mean what gives? I’m done chasing bad boys and now I feel like I deserve to have a kind and hard-working man to come and marry me and be a good provider and father to my son. I don’t care what he looks like as long as he’s over 6 feet tall, makes good money, doesn’t have kids, hasn’t ever been married, has a nice car, has his own house, is planning for the future, is confident, funny, independent (but not too independent), fashionable, suave, educated, cultured, and wants to treat me like the amazing, special person that I am. Is that really too much to ask? Why can I not find a man like this? Where did all the good men go?
    Signed,

    The Women of Generation Y

    1. yankees992012

      Where Did All The Good Men Go?- That ship has sailed for you. Citing your age and experience. That is alot of baggage for good men. If you had to do it over, do it right the first time. In US, we live in a very conservative society and this is what frowns upon. I am married to a girl who never done it with anyone else, grew up with her and have kids. With modern dating, it very hard to block off the past citing the social network out there. Have you consider it better in a long run to remain single. Take care of your kids you have now. Good luck

    2. well i think many many years ago a female psychologist said that women do not really know what they really want.
      Ring a bell?

    3. You must first improve yourself and yourself esteem there’s no guarantee that you’ll meet a man who earns six figure salary date a guy because you like them not because of their money or you’ll be single for the rest of your life if you too picky.There are lots of average joe nice guys who would like to go out with you you have to make them notice you

    4. I’m a 29 y/o guy, that has the vast majority of what you said you were looking for: My own house, good job, no kids, never been married, in good physical shape, over 6’, I’m a genuine kind and respectful person (as far as I’ve been told).. etc. but what would a guy like me want with a girl like you at this point?? I guess we’re both selfish in our own ways, and as a result, we both end up screwed.. I Probably would have married a girl like you before the child, and before the age of 25, but now? For what? At 29 I can get all the sex I want without having to commit, and I still find myself primarily attracted to women at peak fertility and at their physical peak.. aka women between the ages of 21- 25 (or so). It’s just nature- women are at their prime sexual market value in their early 20’s. Of course, all the wifey material girls within that age range want to party and hang out with losers, and it won’t be until they hit about 28 that they realize they fucked up! good guys don’t like older women that have been around the block with strange men throughout their 20’s and have kids by other dudes. We want a young, still somewhat innocent and impressionable princess who hasn’t been knocked- up, and kicked around by All the other scumbags. We want a clean foundation to build with. I’m sorry, but where were ya’ll when we really wanted you?? Oh, and now it’s painfully obvious that your biological clocks are ticking and all of a sudden you’re all ready for wedding rings. Wouldn’t that be convenient??
      Sorry, but unless you get really lucky, you’ve missed that bus..

      Moral of the story ladies: when you’re in your early 20’s think about your future, look for a good man a few years older that has his shit together, and lock it down because THAT IS YOUR TIME.

      1. Don’t buy into these toxic baby male posters!What is going on here? “ Clean foundation”? Of course you should have sowed your wild oats when you were in your twenties!
        I think all these posters are indeed the losers who live in their Mothers basements now! Listen,you your ship hasn’t sailed,because there is no ship for either sex! “At their prime”, all this BS. These losers want a woman,sorry,girl,preferably pre pubescent or still inutero who they are not afraid of by their knowing just how bad in bed they are.
        Look,the reason you have not met any normal men in the past three years is because,obviously, they are damn hard to find! Listen to this smagma! You have every opportunity for the rest of your life to find a partner. If you want a father,look to your father!Continue to make your own dreams come true. There actually are good men ,not the posters here,obviously,who are also not boring. The men who lock it down early are boring,uncultured,have no social skills and expect nothing from life,would you want to seal the deal with that? Unless you can also get a man you can train from birth with no dirty baggage, like the “ thought “ processers here,do you and forget it.As times goes by,they are learning slowly. But who even needs them,what’s the point? Make your own money,have wonderful friends stop smoking and use them for what they’re good for,which is…..?

      2. Moral of the story for YOU and MEN: We want a prince who hasn’t been around the block. As far as your princess shit, if that were true I would have been married 6 times by now. They reject princesses for tight short shorts and crop top stomachs hanging out, and yes, they marry those women. and the men are not poor. Your fertility nonsense: All of the ones I knew were scared to get any girl pregnant and then married some fatter woman so they could live off of her salary after they got her pregnant. Fact.

    5. Benito Madarang

      Regarding this article:

      http://www.the-niceguy.com/contributors/GoodMen.html

      I have two MAJOR, I mean a MAJOR issues with this author. And it revolves around these 2 quotes:

      “I mean what gives? I’m done chasing bad boys and now I feel like I deserve to have a kind and hard-working man to come and marry me and be a good provider and father to my son.”

      This new guy in your life is not the father of your son!!!!!!!!!!!!! He can be nothing more than a good friend and mentor to your son. He has only ONE biological dad. And that is the dad who you copulated with to produce him. He is not to discipline, spank him or do any parenting whatsoever. I could take 100 psychologists who specialize in the childhood psychology of kids who have been thru divorce, and the single greatest mistake a single parent can make is to attempt to make the step parent into a father or mother. It is simply wrong. The kid has every right to tell that step parent, if he or she oversteps their boundaries: “To hell with you, you’re not my real dad or mom, get out of here.” And you know what? The child is right. You screwed up by having the kid in the first place. By actually having unprotected sex with a bad boy who was going to be a lousy dad. Even if you believe he is lousy, you are NEVER allowed to say bad things about your ex in front of your child. NEVER. It is one of the most harmful things you can to a child who is living with a step parent. I repeat, your new “good guy” is nothing more than a friend and mentor to your child. Yes, he has a right to stand up for himself, but he has no place in parenting. I swear to you, if you ask 100 out of 100 psychologists about this, they will agree with me. You need therapy yourself!

      Next quote:

      “I don’t care what he looks like as long as he’s over 6 feet tall, makes good money, doesn’t have kids, hasn’t ever been married, has a nice car, has his own house, is planning for the future, is confident, funny, independent (but not too independent), fashionable, suave, educated, cultured, and wants to treat me like the amazing, special person that I am.”

      Why the hell does it matter what his height is? This is the very core reason why you got in trouble in the first place. First of all, there are plenty of women, who even at 21, have no issues dating a 5 ft. 5 man. But the reason why women in American culture have a dislike of dating short men is because they are overly concerned about what their girlfriends and parents think about the man they are dating. They also want to match what they see in Cosmo Magazine, Sex In The City, and in Hollywood (although many men in Hollywood date women who are taller). Emotionally immature gals want social safety. You do not want your gal pals and parents picking on you for dating a short guy. That’s all it is. You’re too damn concerned about what other people think of you. Former Men’s Health dating advise columnist Nicole Beland once said that before her current husband, the best man she ever dated was a guy that matched her eye to eye in heels. He was the sexiest man she had ever known. He was confident, had a good job, a killer body, handsome, witty, smart, loyal, ethical….he had everything…….except she didn’t have the guts at her young age to tell her girlfriends and parents to shut up about her man’s height. It just went on and on and on and on. It got so bad that at her young age, she had to dump the guy. She said if she hadn’t met her fiancee, it would’ve been the greatest mistake in her life. She still feels awful about it, because it had NOTHING to do about how she REALLY felt. It had to do with what her girlfriends and parents felt. This quote in this article shows that this woman has not grown up. She shows a remarkable lack of maturity. It doesn’t make a dang of difference what most guys’ height is unless you are 5 ft. 10 or something. Most short men still tower over girls in heels. We have reached the point of evolution where a man’s height means nothing. I have a high degree belt in karate. Frankly, I can put your 6 ft. 2 boyfriend on his knees. And if I had a hand gun, he’d really be on his knees. It’s all about social safety, and maintaining the long relationships you have with your immature gal pals and disruptive parents who have no right to comment on who you are dating unless they are beating you. Until you get out of this “height issue,” who will be no more different than you were in your supposed former former self. Shame on you! A man can do nothing to change his height. Plastic surgeons, dieticians, and fitness instructors can do most things to change women and their beauty, but I don’t advise it because most women are beautiful as they are. They only do surgery to correct a male’s height when he is a boy, and the procedure is more risky than getting a penis enlargement. But what ticks me off is that it’s all about appeasing other people than yourself. I’d bet my life savings that if women let go of all opinions of the men they dated, short men would have no issues getting dates.

    6. Sloppy leftovers

      Good men don’t settle for sloppy leftovers.
      Look carefully at your list . . . no mention of sex . . . . only a shopping list (gimme, gimme, gimme . . . because I am worth it)

      Quality men want to feel desired by their women . . . you are looking for a free meal.
      You have had enough sex for a lifetime . . . he KNOWS that marrying you is going to result in a sexless marriage.
      Once you have snarred him, you wil get bored with him & start cheating on him.
      Buy yourself a cat . . .& stop deluding yourself.

      When you had MARKET VALUE you kicked “Mr Right” in the nuts . . . . he never forgot that. Your market value is no ZERO

      Educate your dughter to behave and act like a lady, so that she does’nt fall into the same trap, that you have sprung

      1. American women are taught they’re the prize, they are unable to sexually desire men, they are too dumb to figure out they have any sexual desires.

        I always see American women with ugly men, ugly men allow golddigging, they attract female leaches.

        Men have to stop paying for dates and gifts, watch all the stupid women leave, plus women need to make their own money and be complete adults.

        There women that are actual SEXUAL BEINGS , they will desire you sexually
        and be self made, have their own money.

        People have to stop stereotyping women as being “used” , women are sexual too.

    7. Omg i was laughing so much at the end, the description of the man you are looking for is ALL ALL ALL who i am , i was dumped by a 28 yr old girl , and decided to date a BIG ASS LOSER, Weed dealer, convicted , living on his parent basement, no car or drivers liscene, no career, can you believe? imi heart broken but it is what is it.

  32. Y’all are overthinking it. Losers get women simply because they make the free time to romance the women with words and fake acts of kindness all day. They are also not wired correctly mentally and do not take “No” for an answer and believe that they are owed female attention. It’s literally a numbers game and someone will have them eventually. I am a woman who ignores such men and it’s alot of work. I hate going out because of it. Not all women are just coasting on tingles all day. I would venturw to guess that a lot of women just go along with the losers as oppised to having to constantly change their routes to various destinations, cut off conversations where they try to manipulate you, reject their advances and requests for your number etc all day every day. Women who would tokerate the attention of a “good guy” are probably largely avoiding leaving their homes or tired.

  33. I’m currently seeing a dead beat loser, after never having been with one, but he’s so good in bed I currently don’t care. Not a boyfriend or husband material but honestly his dick makes up for all of it.

    1. Wow I was just dickmatized for 8 months by my deadbeat loser until I caught him on snap chat texting a 14 yr old and he is 28. Be safe

    2. MidnightMoonWater

      I was that deadbeat loser for her. My father had just died and I was alone for the first time in my life. Then she came a long a month later, and asked to be a part of my life. I like to think everything was great and we were both happy. That wasn’t the case. Anyways, fast forward 2 years, and I’m sick of being the beadbeat boyfriend. I sign up for the military knowing its a career and I can provide for her and our future family. It is also my dream job so I knew I’d be happy. She decides that we should take a break. I don’t agree so instead we break up. It will be the hardest time of my life so far, but I make it through both the break up and basic training. Through out this time we keep in touch, and a month later we both decide that we should spend a week together. It doesn’t work out. She tells me she isn’t attracted to me anymore, and instead we should just be friends. I talk to her friends, and they tell me I can find someone better. I talk to her parents and get them to have a group discussion with us. They tell her they want whats best for her not for me. That I’m better than all the other guys she’s been with before and after me. Certainly better than the guys shes seeing now. They say that she will regret not going with me when years down the line she sees how my life is going and starts comparing it with hers. She ignores or deflects everything they say. It begins to click in my head. Due to her upbringing with her parents (different mom than the one here) she can only be with guys she can control and abuse. She’s not interested in me anymore because I’ve grown a back bone and I’m now successful. Despite all of this I still love her. I want to give her a better life. To put her through school, to buy her things, and let the rolls be reversed if she wants.I want to be the provider for her, and she doesn’t want that. She wants to stay where she is to be with guys just as broken as she is. It breaks my heart, but I have no choice but to move on now, and focus on my life.

      1. Actually,you sound like you are the one interested in controlling her! Who arranges a group meeting with her family to get her to change her mind? Instead of looking at yourself,you blame her as being controlling. So you won’t learn,and you’ll expect the next girl to fall in line. Did it ever occur to you that maybe she doesn’t want a father figure but an equal in a partner? “ Put her through school and buy her things?” I know you mention the “ rolls” being reversed,but maybe she wants someone who can spell.
        Sorry,it does sound like you cared for her,but next time show her that you can take no for an answer and don’t try so hard. Her idea of what a loser is may not be what you or her family thinks it is.

  34. Anonymous stweet

    I think it’s the lies personal gain I Have experience see its few women’s out there use the guy for his money but don’t really love him just to better herself and then she can have other males that she claimed just friends but she dated him also. You have some males out lie about their relationship that they not in one personal gain just to get what they want only greedy people does that. I haven’t seen recently happened multiple times is bad for the business women’s. They’re used a business just to flirt with every guy not to say a woman’s and man’s not like . You have some females prostitute in and out their house by fornicatin with a lot of guys that they calm friends but they’re dating secretly anyways people suffer because the bad choices that they make you can’t blame God for your mistakes that’s wrong especially if we have a free will think about it now every men and women supposed to have their own husband and wife and whoever told you that dating multiple people is a good thing that’s a lie

  35. HellsFuckinWRY?

    Cant even try to talk to some girls at work because some douche says some sarcastic stuff and women just flock to that scum. Yealh he llooks like Ron Jeremy’s Fat son (not an attack on fat people, strictly that creep) Then he comes and tries to ask me questions in a nice way so he can attack with sarcasm and this turns all these women on for laughter, Im from asia, and Im sick of how no women even attack this bastard, they just side with whatever that scum says, and he is lucky that women makes excuses and come near him and this gives him more fuel to attack where as i cant even win against this scum bastard cuz they all against me. He says hi to them, they say back, but with me most women just ignore walk away, and girls are intimidated cuz Men give off the bang vibe and he doesnt give off the impression he wants to bang? ha!
    Now they are throwing creep labels because they are thinking i dont have a girlfriend, but its really insulting for us when women just flock to these insufferable fools and they get all the women, women spread their legs for these scum and ; ( cant even try to date or have a romantic apporach at all! they all just side with one guys bs, i really dont know how to handle this, the only answer to this lies in women and they know it, but they treat us further like dirt!

    Have a new car, a boring ass job, and the girls at work dont even look at me, (dressed nice, hygiene on check at all times)

    They keep and now work sucks because word is probably im a loser, and i feel these girls always give in to these types of idiots and it feels always they all vs just me.

    i thought women will come and throw some fire back at the attacker, but nah not at all.

    This other girl ignores me on 2nd day, for some reason, i dont even know why, and yes i like her.. feel so hopeless, the truth i learned sucks..

    1. Most women nowadays are brain dead to begin with, especially the much younger ones that go for men with a very big bank account. They really are total losers to begin with, since they really are so clueless and worthless altogether.

    2. The Known Truth

      Most of these very pathetic women will just grow very old all alone with their cats when the time comes.

      1. Cheryl Hazzard

        It may not be so bad to be the woman who is alone, if what the woman attracts is deadbeats, abusers, and other types of loser men with enormous issues that she has no chance of being able to fix it. If a woman learns to respect herself and build up her own life, she may not be doing too bad long term. The tough thing is bouncing back after the having the baby with Mr. Wrong, having lived with Mr. Wrong, and having possibly married Mr. Wrong. Eventually the kid or kids grow up. They start becoming more independent, and the woman has more freedom to do what she wants. Sometimes it takes a bit to learn what a good quality and the bad quality guys look like. I wish I had a lot more practice dating before I got serious about a guy.

    3. You say you have a “boring ass job” and that women flock to the “ sarcastic” men. Ok,see,that’s probably called “ funny”, and everybody needs that. Try to find some enjoyment in your life,some humor and life,and others will pick up on that and like it,don’t despair!

    4. Lmao it’s cuz white women are racist as f. Don’t act like you’re immune from that kind of shit.

  36. only rejected men are triggered .might as well be muslim..all desiring another man’s daughter lol. the only thing that leads to is cousin marriage (by force/arrangement and an average IQ of 84) they make good workers though…labor type jobs….service jobs…obedient men….the women also cook and clean…..they cant aspire to great things…but they can subsist off of free women and men’s societies….only for a time.(til welfare runs out) I don’t think a woman with an IQ higher than a male should be with him…..unless she “loves” him (love not pity) not the toxoplasma induced “love” ….

    1. James Freeman

      That’s american Media concept of Muslims. Many Muslim countries such as in Middle east dont act like this. It has to do with brainwashing when women was a little girls back then. No wonder why America will never be friends with Societies that are very opposite from ours. Most of the complaints about women here in this post is about American women. The rest of the world doesn’t act like this. By the way it been 4 years, it’s time to close this post.

  37. They go out with losers because that’s what their biology forces them to do.

    Alpha fux, beta bux

    1. not biology as much as an infection (toxoplasma) women do go after these bad men but then they also do abort his seed. its evolution.it was to teach the lesson to his mother that she also should have aborted him rather than bring him into the world to bother her…its a statement for future generations. its why Jesus said blessed is she who never gave birth (is a “woe” you you AND your children”) she is ultimate teacher. he can be prevented from existing. so he wont have to ask stupid questions and she can be free to have only good men as a selection and not abort to make the statement to his mother…

  38. Well when you look at how many very pathetic women that are everywhere nowadays which they will usually go with these kind of very pathetic men as well, especially if these men are very rich.

  39. Batmansbestfriend

    It’s easy. Women date losers with money and social status. The amount of money and dosial status is relative to what the woman has (or doesn’t have). Women just want a guy who will make her friend’s jealous and if he can do that, not leave her in the poor house, and is hot then she’s set. What about personality? Women will put up with the most garbage men as long as they’re hot and rich. They’ll get beat nearly to death and keep coming back just to get more money and maintain their social status. It’s that simple. Men love women and women love money/social status. Men love who the women is and women love what the man can give her.’ Nothing more complicated than that. Women try to claim it’s biology because of child rearing, but what about women who don’t even want kids doing exactly the same thing? Huh? How is it for the kids then? Plus, in all the ways we’ve evolved over thousands and thousands of years women are still the same cave women they were 200,000 years ago except they can speak English and do math? I don’t think so. It’s just an excuse so they can justify being shallow. Then they claim all men want are boobs. Hell, if that were true, at least we like something about the woman. Women just want the man for his money and don’t care how much of a piece of crap he is as long as he can make her friends jealous. Seriously, the only way to attract a women is to have a large bank account. Nothing more.

    1. yankees992012

      lol, You really have a very shallow view of the world. It is 2019, Women no longer act like that. With all the horror stories we hear on the news. Women has wised up.

      1. ( Alpha flux being women who create beta flux,being men,who can do nothing.) If you want to play that game.

    2. You completely missed the point here. “Losers” as this article is referencing are men who have neither money nor status. These dusty broke dudes who work part time or full time at minimum wage, are usually heavily in debt, no kids, no property, and then you’re baffled to meet his wife/gf who seems like a kind, reasonable (if mentally downtrodden) person.

      1. No, any idiot can have a job and status, losers are most of the me,not all,but a lot of the men posting here.

    3. Dude.. you have no clue at all. I own 5 successful companies and can’t find an acceptable girlfriend. I end up dating a lot of loser girls and gold diggers who actually leave me to date broke guys lol (before you get happy, I’ve never been scammed or spent more than $500 on a relationship). I have literally everything I want in the world, minus an acceptable woman. If being rich was a guarantee, I wouldn’t be reading this article trying to understand why some women are so dumb.

      1. I think we have raised more questions than answers. Maybe we all love being miserable? If you find the answer, let us know!

        1. You never spent more than $500 on a relationship? You must be a cheap guy, no women would want to be with someone that cheap. Dating is expensive and buying each other gifts is part of having a relationship and if you count your money all the time even if you say you have lots of it, who the would want to be with a cheap guy that is just a turnoff. *face palm*

          1. yankees992012

            This is why no men wants to date women like you. The term of “Gold digger” is the types who goes after money. Money never brings happiness and love. This is 2019, nobody I know of would have still buy “gifts” to one another. It looks like you are out of touch of reality. just my 2 cents

      2. I am speechless, $500 on a relationship that is why women leave you for a loser. No offense, but my dates dinners are a lot more than your “relationship contributions”. At the end of the day who is the the biggest loser?

  40. howard bonds

    Women go out with deadbeat losers, simply because they are deadbeat losers themselves! Lets put an end to this nonsense right now!! Everyone wants to take the easy way out especially women. When the smoke clears and the Junkies, thugs, losers, “dungeon masters”, perpetual children, motor cycle gang members fade away…women look at their cut and then make a dash for “the good man” after its waaay too late…Why because they are just as much of a bum as them men they are running from!! Matter of fact thats what the loser men do too…Make a dash for that last chance!! Thats the answer! Easy!

    1. James Freeman

      I 100 percent agree, Nobody i know wants a used up women. They are what we call “baggage”. It is time to educate young girls that these guys are dangerous. Let return to the 90’s education. Back then these type of guys were shunned. So much for so called “Conservative values” today which totally destroyed women. Thank God that i am married and look at them as disgusted.

      1. Thank god INDEED that you are off the market,you’d have a very hard time being looked at by a woman,you are now used up and have heavy heavy baggage! Poor you.

  41. It is very unfortunate that the majority of the women today are very useless, clueless, very stuck up altogether now. And they have the worst personality and no manners at all when it comes to men which i can certainly see that they had a very unhappy childhood when they were growing up. Enough said right there.

  42. “As a man, you’ve got to get your financial act together if you want to be marriage worthy to be able to take care of a family.”

    Funny, I dumped an otherwise perfect girlfriend for the very same comment after 3 years of living together. I think she did not know what hit her, she did not understand. I have that notion that a relationship starts with a human connection and we can always build something together from scratch. There is also that if you demand something you have to offer something equivalent in return. That is lost on many. With the attitudes so often stated being perpetually single actually is a very attractive option. However, it did not work out for me :D I fell victim, not sure how, and I am very happy with my family. I also went from homeless to millionaire with some old fashioned hard work in the process, so there is that. The woman I love had to take me broke though.

    1. James Freeman

      you can be surprised to realized this blog has been ongoing for over 7 years since it started. So it not all B.S. On the other note, Dating has turned worse now in 2018 compared to let’s say in the 90’s. non-virgins are non-starters when it comes to serious relationships. In 2018, what does any women brings to the table. What is anything special about them, just my 2 cents.

    2. I completely agree. Although i am financially stable, money really has nothing to do with a fulfilling relationship. By setting standards on money, your foundation will always be money.

      I just think that people have lost their gumption in life. They think that love is conditional (money), hence why divorce is so commonplace nowadays.

      I would never give a woman the time of day if money was a factor. People, by nature don’t need a lot to be happy. Clothes on their back, food, a roof over their heads, and a work ethic are the necessities of life.

      1. I used to agree…when I was 22. Then I went out with a string of broke “nice” guys who I learned over time really had no ambition or masculine mission, and were happy to just let me be the breadwinner while they did less and less. No thanks. If I had made the mistake of quickly marrying one of them, I’d likely be paying alimony right now!

    3. Good on you! I’m sorry that your partner didn’t see that. Its not about the money,I agree, human connection and trust and building something up together,that’s how I see it as being the best way,instead of all these one size fits all across the board template checks, best of luck to you.

  43. Miguel Lewis

    No offense but you women aren’t all a gift. So to sit here on your pedestal and say all this is kind of intriguing. Women are consistent at being inconsistent lol if that makes any sense. You girls forget the guy is more than just a free ticket to mooch off of. Be yourself and be independent than maybe you wouldn’t have to rely on men so much. Like it’s so crazy how you “women” are so needy. Of course I have everything but I just had to put my input in it. I mean obviously most of these non sense blogs are by women or gays because they are the only ones that would just there and type all this b.s. like get a life. I only read the first paragraph but shit. I feel so sad for you.

  44. Why do men date sex workers like strippers? because you have nowhere else to turn. Only the bottom of the barrel will tolerate such personal degrading and self loathing. Its not healthy and strippers wonder why they date deadbeats? because anyone with self respect isn’t going for this cop out career where you justify shaming your family and children. Get a real skill and you might get some respect.

    1. Anonymous Sweet

      I feel strip clubs is the biggest s rip-off ever spending your money on worthless things they’re getting getting richer of you you’re getting broke stripping another form of prostitution

    1. james freeman

      it more like “nice guy” equals to “rapists” then again Rape is a dead letter in US. Thank god I am married man. If you look at the “dating scenes” today. It shameful women has to stoop so low to fall for the oldest tricks on the books.

  45. Wow this is a long comments section. A lot of you people think too much. It comes down to this with women dating losers. It’s about the looks and sex. I’ve known countless women that will say they want all these qualities in a man, but never mention looks. A great percentage of women will dismiss all those qualities they are looking for if the guy is good-looking and great in the sack. Just like men do that with hot women. They don’t care about if she has a job or whatnot if she has great physical qualities and is great in bed.

  46. Hi everyone, I dont know how did I came across this post, but felt need to input some info here. I do agree with some of the guys in the post. Depending on location/Religion, One thing has in common is Virginity. Since some of you claimed young women go after bad guys or losers. But there is one thing that dead beat losers win in this area, is using the girl’s virginity. Most nice guys I know wont go after seconds or even thirds. This is the reason why nice guys turned most of these type of women away. A question to ask- Who in the right mind would want a wife who been around the block a few times? That question never gets old and has been asked so many times. The answer would be Self-respect. It better to learn early not later. By going after dead-beat losers meaning giving up a chance to find a really nice guy later on. I have seen many relationship fail because of the woman’s view got skewed by previous guy then carry on to the next guy. There’s no such thing as starting over fresh with new relationship. There’s always at least one thing lingers from previous relationship to the next. With that, is what causes Nice or successful guys to turn these women away. I dont think Family have anything to do on rather a guy would be a loser or Successful. Modern Dating is by far the most vicious I ever seen. By the way, I am very happy to be with my wife who never been with other guys. Just my 2 cents here.

    1. “Most nice guys I know wont go after seconds or even thirds. ”

      Good luck finding an attractive woman that is a virgin in the US. I don’t care what she tells you. And you may even want to add a 0 after the first digit that’s in your head for the average attractive woman’s notch count unless you marry them when they are really, really young (like 20). Church girls are actually some of the worse here, and they generally do a better job of hiding it.

      “By the way, I am very happy to be with my wife who never been with other guys.”

      I hope you are right. Young buddy of mine at work just got divorced last week found out his wife had lied about her virginity and a few years into the marriage (possibly earlier) was cheating on him with other men from the church and elsewhere and that’s just what she admitted at the end.

      therationalmale.com explains female behavior very well btw

      1. I understand from where your coming from. My wife and I got married young. Based on your comment is the another reason why many single men out there dont bother to date.

        1. I agree with Rob, it’s almost 2020! Why would you still go after someone who’s a virgin? You need experience to be good in bed. And how old school of you to say that, so it’s ok for you to not be a virgin but your wife has to be one? Talk about a double standard here. Do you keep reminding yourself that you love your wife bc she has never been with anyone else? If only she has experienced other guys and then ended up choosing you bc you are the winner and a good lover but sadly she has no one to compare it with so she has no idea… imagine that.

          1. yankees992012

            This type of thinking is the reason why dating is a mess today than any time before. You may be surprised that there are women who do put off having sex until 20’s and early 30’s. Based on my past experience, non-virgins are non-starter when it comes to relationships and truest. Not one non-virgins ever been honest or faithful. It no wonder why in US we have the highest divorce rate. By “Comparing” with other guys would lead to lower self-esteem, carelessness, pain and suffering. There are alot of downsides being with non-virgins and you probably already know the downsides. There are no double standards here, this is personal choice i made. Good luck getting Std’s and all the other nastiness associated with non-virgins.

            1. I’m guessing you and I just look at things differently, but if the person you are seeing is a virgin (of either gender) or even someone of limited sexual experience, there’s a high likelihood they aren’t very good in bed and don’t know what they are doing.

  47. Deadbeat losers…I have one in my life and I don’t want to be around him. I am professional lady that actually at this point doesn’t mind being alone. I have kids and I am divorced. My whatever you would call him is in rehab, no job, no car, no home, etc. I prefer not to be associated with him. I know I can do a lot better. I see my adult kids (both in college) have bf’ and they are very sweet. Will it last? who knows but im kind of jealous? Men and women are alike although at different times in their lives. Some day I will meet the man of my dreams

  48. I think the definition of “deadbeat loser” has been skewed a bit. If you’ve held down a steady job, for more than 20 years, have no dept, some savings, but not a bunch own a vehicle, and pay rent somewhere, even though it may be at your parents place, because a home is unaffordable to buy, with what you earn. Does this make you a loser? What if you never went to college or university, pull in less than 450000 a year, don’t play video games, not a drug addict, or alcoholic , don’t have any plans or goals for the future, even though you can pay your own way, without wallowing in dept? Does that make you a loser?

  49. Have you ever gotten the feeling that lots of women are really just trying to spite people who seem to have “figured” it out? They see a guy who is clean and together, and sometimes I could sense the resentment and they only way I could stick it to them is to withhold my powerful sexuality and punish him for their uppity-ness of not being as confused, unsure and superficial as they are?

    1. That’s it, I think.
      It’s feminism. Stick it to the man.
      They don’t want to respect their man. They want a boy toy.

      There was an article where a feminist professor said she would have sex with homeless men to ease their pain of being such underdogs. In other cases in Sweden in migrant camps some aid worker women have sex with the migrants or let them rape them, as charity. They donate their pussy to the perceived underdog.
      Those women who prefer looser boyfriends are just milder versions of the above 2 examples. What is common: some kind of cultural leftist feminist thinking, anti-meritocracy. Anti-meritocracy has passionate hate for successful people. So many women are attracted to leftism.

  50. Hello, deadbeat here. Never had a girl interested in me so where are all the deadbeat loving girls??? lol.

  51. Most women in the old days were the very best of all and just look at how bad they really are today which tells the whole story right there alone.

      1. yankees992012

        I hope your drinking on that night. This is a very old post and your replying to a 2 years old comment?

    1. Matthew Moselle

      Bwahahahahahahahahaa. Yeah right, no intimacy? What?…. While she blows and screws someone else to get her nut off, all the while pretending to be a virtuous martyr in front of you. GTFO of here with that nonsense. You people are mentally ill and full of $hit.

  52. Lily Collins

    it might take long to be in a broken relationship but it’s never going to to be forever.i have been living with heartbreak for couple of years now, which wasn’t funny.it caused a lot of loss to me and my mind not been settled. i and my husband got into argument and we had a fight, he was cheating i tried to stop him but all to no avail. after a while, we had to go our different ways but i was hurt because i love him with all my heart and i can’t afford to loose to another lady, fortunately i came across this testimony of a woman online who also battled with a similar issue until she was helped by Dr.Mack. i also had to contacted Dr.Mack for help regarding my Marriage issue. he did what he have to do for me and in less than 4 days my husband was back. he automatically changed to a good man, was faithful and showed me love in a way i never expected, i oblige anyone with similar problem to contact Dr.Mack via email;dr_mack@yahoo. com****

  53. Hey, this comment is a bit late in coming; I only saw this article today (July 15th). I am in my early 60s, and have children who will be ‘eligible to get married” in a few more years. My wife & married later than the average American couple so our kids are still in their teens. I don’t mean to be preachy, but I don’t understand why so few of the people who make comments haven’t included God in their discussion? If you follow the principles for living as a Christian, you may or may not get rich (not the only goal in life) but you will be a happier, more contented person, and more likely to find the partner you can live with and enjoy. You won’t escape the possibility of your partner falling sick or still doing dumb things, but God will have you back.
    “IF” there is a God, and “IF” He is the one who made us, doesn’t it makes sense to seek out the principles that “He” has laid out for healthy, sustainable marriages. My marriage isn’t perfect, and neither my wife nor I are perfect people, but we remain content.
    Even if you are not ready to believe in God, seek out some older couples who have been around the block a few times (eg. have marital experience) and get their advice. You don’t have to do this alone…

    1. Doug,

      I hate to burst your bubble but the worst men I’ve dated were ALL Christians. I’m a woman working on my own business and getting ready to relocate. It’s easier for me to move because all of the unmotivated, whiny, immature men in the area I’m leaving only care about sex and getting a woman to be their slave.

      Just last week I saw a local newspaper with an ad in it from a church that has classes just for women to learn how to be an “obedient wife to her husband”, and “how to put her family first before her needs” which is insulting and part of the abusive indoctrination that is religion. Any woman with any drive, work ethic, and independent spirit can’t put up with such nonsense. It’s wrong and when you have married couples who have to have a dual income, forcing one to throw away her education and all of the work she put into it just to keep a house clean is cruel and disgusting.

      The town I’m leaving has 67 – 69% of the people living there on some form of government assistance, have bastards from different Christian boyfriends, demand others pay their way, claiming they’re “good Christians” all while bashing me. Somehow I’m a bad person because I’m not in their same predicament and every single person my age and younger sees no point in paying a 10% tax and wasting their life having a hypocrite who has never lived outside of the church and in the real world give them “life advice”. The women get the worst of it. They are indoctrinated and made to believe they’re only as good as what they can do on their backs and
      knees for a man. This explains a lot of what Sam is talking about when it comes to women dating losers. Ive given up on thsese women because they are so brainwashed. I have to take care of myself and my family and the churches should be ashamed of their disgusting doctrines.

      The abuse was prevalent in schools as well. My own siblings and myself were told in our lousy public school that girls only have babies and cook. That’s it and how many girls had bastards and were kicked out as the result of such brainwashing? Nearly 25% of my female classmates had their lives destroyed by religion. You’re just a domestic slave and a brood mare. Your life is nothing but changing diapers and cleaning up after an adult male who makes all of your decisions for you, because as they explain it, women are just too dumb. One sibling was betrated and thrown out of a pre-engineering course, another was pushed out of science, and I was denied Advanced Placement courses despite exceeding all requirements. I was also denied access to an autoshop class too – because it’s only “man’s work”. I actually had a teacher call me a dike because “only dike sluts do that work”.

      Religion is a cancer and it only helps those who want to be in charge. The younger generations are too busy subsidizing those who made those terrible decisions to keep having bastards when they couldn’t care for themselves because children are now a form of income. If you have a kid then you get a house or mobile home with cheap rent, you get food stamps, free health care only if you’re pregnant, and more. Everyone like me is taxed to pay for their needs so that they can just focus on what they want to waste money on. Don’t want to buy your kids toys for the holiday? Apply for a program where suckers will buy your kid an XBox for you, because if they don’t buy toys for your kids they’re the monsters. Meanwhile they have a Cadillac parked in that trailer park while I drive a car that’s welve years old and fully paid for.

      I know I’ll get attacked for stating the truth, but I’m used to such hatred and nothing really suprises me from that group of hypocritical pew jumpers anymore. Trying to base such important decisions in life on a bunch of nonsense from desert savages makes about as much sense as calling a psychic hotline. Younger people don’t have time for it and if you don’t make enough and aren’t rich, churches, temples, synagogues and more can discriminate against you, proving they really just want your money period.

  54. The Sad Truth Of All.

    And yet, these women will sleep around with all different kinds of men every chance they get. How very pathetic.

  55. Because that’s what’s around them is the short answer, you don’t find a diamond in a dumpster, stop hanging out in “trendy” bars or only going to things if there’s a chance it will end in a hookup. Men looking for a free ride are thinking the exact same way about how to get what they want (that being as much as possible for nothing) which is why going out specifically to meet men you meet losers. These men instead of thinking “where can I go to meet a nice woman” they’re thinking “where can I go that’s full of women so desperate they have to go looking for it” whether the women are desperate or not is irrelevant, the same woman men fall over themselves to talk to outside the singles scene is treated like day old bread the minute she hits a singles bar or opens a dating accout, perception is everything. The good men are too busy having a life to go to things where nasty people are putting knives in each others backs, if youre serious about finding a good man you should be too busy to be a part of that too, the creeps will only turn you off men in the end.

  56. My issue is my trust for women isnt there anymore …it takes two to tango but since we are focused on women here. I will say this. I have seen way too many married women and men have affairs at work, and tell good guys like me that by staying single ” I might be passing up something Great” Lol..I’m thinking what? I can’t wait to get married to a sweet women like you so you can run around on me behind my back..wonderful. Its hilarious. Also women don’t seem to have a personality of their own..it’s like if they like you they find out what kind of women your interested in, and then they just become that women. They think that they wield some special power over men and think they should be pursued and loved and taken care of and all that…basically entitled, and put nothing into the relationship. I always feel like it’s one sided. If there are good women and I’m sure their are..I haven’t met one.. Even on match.com there’s married women and men pretending to be single and crapping on someone’s heart..in the world of Tinder and the hook up culture, I’ve lost the will to even try anymore, Men are shit, Women aren’t bringing anything to the table but baggage and jacked up morals with no concept of decency. Makes me just wanna run right up to them and say hello haha. Good luck to both sides we all need it. Just my take.

  57. Most of the women nowadays really lack intelligence all the time unfortunately since they really can’t think period. Enough said right there.

  58. Women love scumbags. Don’t waste your time being a good man or a productive man. Get tattoos. Pick fights. Learn how to lie like a champ. These are the keys to success with women.

  59. This Is Why Many Of Us Good Men Are Still Single Today

    Many women nowadays are just down right horrible themselves since i noticed that many women today have no good personality at all and are very disrespectful with us good men when you try to start a simple normal conversation with them since they will CURSE at us for no reason at all which this doesn’t make any sense at all. Many women unfortunately are such pathetic low life losers nowadays and really have some kind of a mental problem the way that they act with us today which many of them are choosing the wrong type of men anyway which certainly doesn’t say anything good about them now at all. It is very obvious why many of us men are still single today because of the CHANGE in the women now unfortunately since the good old days when MOST of the women back then were the complete opposite of what they’re today. And the women back then REALLY DID put these women today to real shame altogether as well.

    1. Woe to them who say good is evil and evil good!

      They will all go down to the pit of destruction!

      I’m not perfect, and admit when I am wrong, but I know and discern the intentions of women and men that are good or evil…

  60. I used to date “losers” because I thought they would appreciate me more. I figured they’d think they had a catch and, thus, would treat me well. And by treat me well, I really mean neither reject, abuse, nor abandon me. For all my education, I had no idea what drove humans to make decisions (love, fears, beliefs) or what the major fears (failure, rejection, abandonment) consisted of. Had I known these things, I would have chosen to be alone rather than waste my time with losers. Had I been life smart, I would have gotten counseling and opened my heart to a real man who was a winner.

    Had I known myself better-that is-know my true feelings and base my knowledge of them off of what I thought about, did, and dreamed of–rather than the lies I told myself–I would have lived my young adulthood radically differently.

    I was better looking; in better shape; more muscled and heavier on the scale; more educated; better traveled; more responsible; and had a better personality. And I came from less. Go figure!

    Whenever we went out, people stared and, at times, even laughed. “What is SHE doing with a guy like THAT?,” they must’ve been wondering. In fact, someone even ASKED me why I was with a guy like that and why wasn’t I with a man. That’s sad.

    The truly weird part, however, was that the losers I dated didn’t actually think that highly of me. They ended up treating me like garbage and made fun of me quite frequently. This turned into emotional and, finally, physical abuse. They didn’t have enough world experience or education to appreciate me in full. In fact, they didn’t even really know the real me…because I didn’t know the real me.

    My self-concept was a train wreck given the highly abusive and chaotic childhood I had had. It turned me into a beautiful person and over-achiever, and I really regret not seeing myself in that light. If only I had had someone sit me down and discuss with me my self-concept…but no one cared enough.

    1. I used to do this too. I dated ugly men and old men BC I wanted to be appreciated more but I learned too late that just BC ugly n old guys say things like ‘if I had a woman like u I wud treat u like a queen’ doesn’t mean they actually mean it. Once u get them they start thinking well if I can get her then I can do even better BC it must be something about me that makes me so special. Then they start to flirt around, next they realize that u r just screwed for picking them and get worried that you might see what a real loser they are so they start treating u bad so u believe u can’t do better than them. Think I’m lying? Try what I did w my loser ex. He was very mean and ugly w me and controlling and unsupportive. Always rejected me and gaslighted me on a regular basis. One day I had enough and asked him ‘why am I even with u?’ Then I pointed out his obvious physical flaws (bald, grey head, wrinkles, bad teeth, belly) and told him if I wanted to get treated like shit I might as well date someone my age who’s in shape. Yes it was mean but he was abusive.
      I told him that I loved him and put up w so much outside world drama of people thinking I’m a gold digger and at least he could love me right BC I was starting to think it wasn’t worth it. His face dropped and all of a sudden the bad boy facade melted and he started playing the victim. He shaped up for 3weeks then went back to being a jackass (that’s just who he was). I left him and have been happy ever since. I think to myself what was I thinking?! I loved him but part of me felt guilty to leave since he was way older than me and had said he didn’t want his family to say I told you so if we didn’t work out. I gave him 6 years of undying loyalty BC I cared about him more than myself and I had little to show for it. Don’t settle for a guy who is not in your league. Also old guys will purposely be mean n stingy to young gfs BC they want to prove to themselves you’re not using them for their money and they will overdo it and u will find that u end up taking care of them! Those old guys have been around longer than u and know all the right things to say to charm you. Proceed with caution if u are dating any man that is more than 8-10 years older than you.

      1. Oh, so older guys or a certain age group and age gap means they will use you and mistreat you, or they have bad intentions, and is why they are with a loser like you in the first place? Might as well say a certain race of men too are more mean people or are only savages out to get your poor little soul. GROW UP.

  61. Single But Not By Choice

    Unfortunately there are so many very Mentally Disturbed Psycho Women nowadays everywhere us Good Men go since when we will try to start a Normal Conversation with a woman that we would really like too meet which she will start Cursing at us for No Reason at all. Had it happened to me already and a friend that i know had the same thing happened to him as well about two months after me. It is very Obvious with these Pathetic Low Life Loser Women that do have very Severe Mental Issues why many of us men are still Single today which we have No Reason to Blame ourselves either since these women need Help very badly.

    1. So true about psycho women, I have this experience everywhere, you try to be nice and polite but get hammered and treated as crap. Whereas scumbags and deadbeats get their full attention even get laid instantly. Go figure.

      1. They have self esteem issues, and really the world needs to look at everything around us, from politics, religion, entertainment, education, and every facet of society with every moral decay where now we have no recourse to anything morally good or sound?

        But, I refuse to let my qualities and values destroy my GOD Given Beliefs on how Freedom suppose to be by placing my soul with good attributes, to put Jesus Christ first, at which I have no problem, because we can not do it any other way by ourselves can we be saved here and eternity, as their is no greater Love than what GOD has done for us but through Him, Christ Jesus, Amen

  62. Yeah this shit is ridiculous. It makes the female sound so humble, settling down with a median paying job and a loved one. Yet, she refers to them as losers if they aren’t these hard working men.

  63. In the world of love, I am a loser. I’m not ugly by any measure and some have even thought of me as handsome but I don’t feel it. Why? This man requires some acknowledgement, any signal, something, anything that hints at a possibility. So I’ve stopped trying because I don’t get any signs even though I throw a smile, a nod, an eyebrow raising, hints that show interest but I get nothing. Perhaps I should be more direct. With women I am acquainted with I do engage in banter, etc. But it seems like they took their measure of me and the result is “meh, I can have him if I want so it’s not a challenge”.

    I’ve come to accept it and am coming to peace with it. I grew up thinking the same as most normal men. If you build it they will come. I built a good life (great career, a growing side business that is profitable, enjoy good health) and want for nothing except a normal girlfriend.

    Yeah, I feel sorry for myself sometimes and it’s pathetic. But as time grinds on, I’m comparing myself to other men my age and am happy how I stack up: acquired wealth, prosperity, decent physique (minimal gut, fit, look great in a suit), etc. I am at ease talking to anybody about anything. I can go to a party (rare event) and easily socialize. I can come and go as I please. I don’t have anybody carping at me or getting hyper critical. I’ll take sex if I can get it but don’t get emotional about it.

    I’ve come to be this way because at 55, it’s brutal out there. There are very few if any truly available women. Women come in a few basic configurations:

    Angry/resentful: these are the divorced who feel they have given their all to their ex-husbands and children who are now grown and out of the house. They feel wronged. They’ve been fed all of the “empowerment” dogma and have gulped it down until it’s coming out of their noses. I have no chance at all with these women because I might have a trait or two that remind them of their ex-husbands or fathers who they might hate very much. These traits could be anything from a wrinkled shirt to my baldness. I am hopeful that their resentments may subside but then they’ll be close to 70.

    Busy: these are the women around my age that have given up and have thrown themselves into caring for their grandchildren. They’re also resentful but not angry. They think all men are the same. At least they’re not angry and don’t project their anger at me.

    Career: these women made decisions long ago that they don’t need or want men. They also gulped the feminist ideology early in life but now find themselves looking for validation and comfort from other women in the same boat. You can’t ride a bike well unless you’ve practiced and these women have spent their live competing with men instead of collaborating with men.

    Former pretty or former hot girls: these women still for the most part have relatively nice faces but below the neckline they’ve not aged well at all. That nice rack doesn’t look so nice. She;s got orange peel all over her and her midsection is bulging. She’s had her pick of men and controlled the situation all her life (she’s picked losers) and hasn’t had to really put any effort into it. She’s enjoyed being an exhibitionist. Who wouldn’t with a face and body like that? But now she’s lost and is now resentful of men because they pass her up, except for the losers as defined by lack of job, hygiene, manners, and basic socialized behavior toward people. She doesn’t know how to attract a decent guy because she never had to think about it. Her expiration date is long past and she offers nothing to compensate like a nice home cooked meal, affection, compassion, or support. The world still revolves around her but it’s not. She’s still bartering entertainment for possible sex as evidenced by her love of “dating”.

    Insecure: I have a business partner who happens to be a woman. She’s like family. We don’t have sex or a romantic relationship. I have to come up with a new word for “partner” even though legally, she owns a part of the LLC. For some reason, partner conjures up sex regardless of the adjective.

    Possessive: these women don’t do possession like somebody cherishing something and taking care of it. These women want to control everything about you. Even if they aren’t interested, they don’t want their girlfriends to get a shot at you.

    Conflicted: you would think at middle age and after all the feminist wars, sex is something to be enjoyed. But not for a lot of these middle aged women. They have not gotten past the madonna/whore thing. They’re still stuck on shame. At work they believe and spew equality in all its banal forms but regarding dating, it’s back to the 50’s. They don’t dare take a risk by expressing interest in a man. They would rather make the decision than suffer rejection.

    Normally adjusted: she has a boyfriend.

    1. Dino, this is in regards to your post. I agree with how hard it must be to find any kind of partner due to past relationships and unforeseen circumstances.

      I am a 48 yrs. old attractive women that has seen her days of heartache. I was in a relationship for 18 yrs. with and alcoholic. I wasn’t really in love with him but I got pregnant at 18 and we had a beautiful daughter. I always dreamed of being that girl that wanted to grow old with the man I had children with, have grandbabies and be happy. I was far from that. He wasn’t a bad man, but alcohol controlled his life. I had a beautiful son 9 yrs. after my daughter. He was born with a disability, he turned my life around. I found patience and love that can’t be explained and I wouldn’t change him for the world. He is 19 yrs. old now and will probably be with me for the rest of his life. I never really worked outside the home when I had my children, I didn’t have them for someone else to raise so I opted to make sure they had a mom that was always there for them.

      When my son started school full time I decided it was time to go back to work, I wanted my independence. I am a very independent and stubborn person, I will admit it. I am not unreasonable and I am very good listener to sensible. I don’t do stupid well. I bought my own house with a little help from my sister, my son and I were now on our own. I stayed away from relationships for 18 months. They say you should not get involved with anyone for at least one month for every year you’ve been married. I was common law, he wouldn’t marry me, he only ever asked when he had been drinking.

      I then met, a man younger than me at the establishment where we both worked. He was one of those guys that said all the right things and made me feel really good about myself. Especially after being in a so called marriage of never going anywhere or doing anything for myself. He wanted to spend time with me and always had the right thing to say. He however didn’t have a license, his story was that he lost it being impaired and chased, and caught by the cops. (I know, red flag there) He also lived in a furnished basement suite with really nothing except his cloths. He only lived half a block away from me. He started coming over almost every night. He would mow my lawn, and we would talk for hrs. I was in a really good place financially. I always had money in my pocket, I had a low mortgage, my car was paid off. He was making really good money as well. We dated for about 6 months then he said he could move in and help me out. I didn’t need helping, but I agreed. Things were great for a while, then things started to change. Maybe it was me that was changing. We have been together 10 yrs., 8 of these married. Within these years I have always worked. I have taken care of my son. I am more of a homebody and don’t have any really close friends. I don’t like the bar scene.

      Things started to change about 4 yrs. ago. Its hard to explain just when it changed. I think that it has just been gradually over the last 4 years when I realized that he doesn’t include me in any conversations he has with his friends. He confessed to me that he didn’t lose is license, he never had one. He didn’t want me to think he was a loser so he made up the cop story. He is very vacant when I talk to him. He has confessed that within the 10 yrs. of being together he has done coke on quite a few occasions. He is consumed with pot and associates with bad company. He knew I didn’t agree with any of that when we met. He checks out other women, not just the occasional glance, the stare for 30 second look. He watches porn. These are just some of the things he has done. It gets so much deeper than that. He loves camping and hunting and I really don’t. I would do it for him, I would enjoy it, but not every weekend and my holidays. He doesn’t want to do anything I enjoy. I want to travel and see places. Walk on the beach holding hands and lay on the beach somewhere drinking fruity drinks. I am a hopeless romantic, I like supper by candlelight or just cuddling on the couch watching movies. I am sure that our age difference plays a role since he doesn’t seem to be growing up. We are now in dept. up to our asses, with a camping trailer he had to have, yes I agreed, I didn’t want to sleep in a tent out with the bears and just wanted him to be happy. He has all the boy toys, Quad, Snowmobile, Motor Bike, and Trailer to hail them all. He has all the hunting gear. I have a huge car payment ( won’t even go into that story) and a Mortgage that is twice as much as when I first bought my home. Along with a $13,000 hot tub that has just rotted after the first year when the pipe burst, it froze and he never fixed it.

      Now this is the second time and as the saying goes, Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me. I am now in the process of a separation. I cannot handle the things he does now to drive me crazy and knows it. I have lost my trust in him. He’s like a teenage boy rebelling against his mother. Its draining! I now get anxiety attacks and my memory is not what it used to be, caused by stress. Now I know that being a strong willed person and stubborn that it probably hasn’t been a cakewalk for him either. I am not going to say that this is all his fault, cause its not. I played a role to, agreeing to all the things that has put us in this situation, now its time to call it a day and say it’s just not working.

      I guess my point is….not all women are crazy. Well…yes we are, but we get hurt and demolished inside. We have all had our share of crap in our lives. Some can move on and be decent about it and others aren’t that strong and hang onto things longer. We as women hold on to things for a long time. We are definitely made to think differently than men. I wish that I could just let things roll off my back. I’ve been working on it, but we are genetically not made that way. But with that said, if the right guy came along and treated, and I will just speak for myself here, the way I need to be treated, I could work on seeing past all the crap that has happened in my life. Yes, there will always be little things that will remind me of things that happened in my past. I do believe that with that right person those things fade in time. Its all about understanding each other as well. I have always been one to say that everything we go through in life is a lesson. I know from this lesson that my standards for myself are higher. I know that I will not try to make a man a better man or think that I can save him. I would like to have a man in my life that I can trust, have fun with, laugh with, talk for hrs., share dreams with, and have each others back no matter what.

      I am a dreamer, but after all this is done, I will be holding out for a man who knows how to respect and love me.

      We all have stories, some good, some not so good. Some learn from them some never do. Don’t lose hope!

    2. Dino, I’m a little late to the party but this comment is brilliant! Thank you for the insightful read, it really resonated on a deep level. You’re right, it can be brutal out there. I hope by now you have found someone who appreciates you completely.

    3. MAdonna whore is a stupid phrase that means nothing. Sex stirs up many conflicting emotions in many people, not just women. And believe me, the women I know are very sexual and unabashed! YOu men! We are all suppposed to HELP EACH OTHER TO STAY PURE and be good, do you realize that? That is what love and sex and romance and marriage is all about. You men keep expecting the benefits of marriage such as sex, support, caring, etc. without marrying anyone. It doesn’t work that way. Not with women who value themselves. And I know women in their 60’s who are in better shape than women in their 20’s! No, we beautiful hot women didn’t pick losers in our earlier years, that is why we are still single. The geeky nice boys married huge obese women .

  64. In my youth I “dated’ around 200 women. The worst were the super hot ones. They had zero interest in Men except what they could get from them and were as promiscuous as any guy. The average looking girls had a lot more going for them. As far as male “Losers” are concerned, women don’t go for them so this article is hog wash.

    1. I wish women didn’t go for them. Tell that to my roommate who is a total loser but somehow gets women. He just slept with my ex-best friend’s girlfriend within the last hour and he’s a filthy grimy person. I can’t imagine how dirty the women are. This is the cutest girl I’ve seen him with but honestly she’s not super hot I would put her at a 7 tops. This guy leaves used condoms on his floor for months at a time without even bothering to clean up after himself. That is a loser in my opinion. He’s not going anywhere in life he’s not even attempting to have a career in the future and he let’s his bosses screw him out of money on every pay check. How can he be anything but a loser?

  65. I’ve met 2 women (who LJBF me) one spent 7 years in a rocky relationship and another 5 years. They both told me when they broke up wit them that they feel like they wasted their time. The only thing I can think of is they thought they were hot, probably the hottest guy they dated. They were obsessed with their man. They dont realize until the relationship is really over that they achieved nothing, no house, no car, no savings. The relationship was a waste of time.

    1. Gaining material things is not the purpose to be in a relationship. No matter how long or short, a relationship is never a waste.

      1. Clair, it is a TOTAL waste of a woman’s time and fertility if she wishes to have children! If you are not interested in building a life with someone and improving your lifestyle, then you can stay single and be poor! We don’t need to be poor and miserable with some man! Poverty causes many many issues.

  66. LetTheRealTruthBeTold

    Many Career women would really make a Horrible Wife anyway do to their Greed And Selfishness that they carry around with them Everywhere they go.

  67. You are all wrong. Here is the issue, women have been making more money over the last 20 years than they ever had before. Now women have the same mentality that men have about money and status. So now when a woman asks a man how much money he makes and it’s a big number like 125 thousand a year it’s is intimidating for the working class woman. Therefore the working woman who makes let’s say 40 thousand a year would rather have someone that makes less so the feel like they can control him. On an everyday basis I see it more and more that the woman is in charge of the relationship. I see woman driving and men sitting in the passenger seat of the car. I see woman being single mothers with the father nowhere to be found. The question is why, why do I see that. It’s a simple answer since the women are out working all the time they want their man to be there at all times for them. A working man that is busy cannot be around all the time when a woman needs him because she is busy also. It is a crazy game these days, but the people losing are the hard working men.

  68. Great article! I agree with everything said here, particularly with the comments about what women are doing in their 20s. I notice that much of the party scene here in NC is filled with young, tanned, fit people but not many have careers or even good jobs. Many work at the beauty counter at the mall, the gym as a personal trainer, or starter jobs. They spend all their time on appearance vs making money and building a future. It is rare that you find someone who does both.

    I totally agree that women waste their time on good looks and sacrifice quality characteristics like ambition, compassion, and stable career. However, I do believe the good guys get taken early so you are left with a very small pool where you must choose between attractiveness and earning potential, decent morals, and all-around nice guy. Very hard to find both!

  69. When you’re young and naive, it’s easy to fall for the lies of a deadbeat. Young people don’t always have the savvy to discern the wheat from the chaff, especially if their upbringing did not provide much advice on dating.

    Look to the parents for answers to this question.

    As for “the good ones are always taken”: If there are good singles, they are damned hard to find. It’s exhausting. There are a lot of people in committed relationships who bend over backwards to hide that so they can cheat until the emptiness in their lives is filled – or so they believe. And they prey viciously on the single population, knowing full well that there are so many of us for the taking. Date with caution, my fellow singles.

    And ladies, keep your legs crossed. That’s the only way to weed out a loser.

  70. Easiest way to tell, IMO, if the guy is a good guy is to not put out for the first few dates (except for a kiss). If the guy waits, he’s probably a good guy. If not, he’s probably not.

    I think the reason a lot of gals end up with bad guys is they are attracted to a lot of their characteristics – spontaneous, carefree, etc. A lot of them are also attractive and due to not having a job (or not having a job that requires you to work more than 35 hrs a week) have plenty of time to stay in shape also.

    Unfortunately a lot of the attractive women spend their 20s “having fun” with the hottest guys they can find (ie go with a guy that’s and by the time they hit 30, the pool of available good quality men has shrunk by probably 75%-80%. My sister in law is that way. She’s 27 and very attractive. Recently she’s been dating 8-10s in looks from guys she meets on Match.com, etc or in person – nearly all of whom are total losers. She makes almost no money (30k/yr) and is always broke and complains about money and men. Recently, I tried to set her up with one my few single friends in his early 30s who just recently got out of a LTR. The guy is probably a 6 in looks (slightly above average), but super funny and great personality (~9), treated his last LTR amazingly for 6 years and makes terrific money (200k/yr+ in NC which is in the top 2% for this area). Her response: “He’s kinda cute but not interested. He’s not super hot.” I just sighed. In 5-10 years, she’s going to regret her decisions but for now she’s having fun having sex with a ton of super hot guys that treat her like crap.

    1. Your definition of “good guy” in your comment is a man who doesn’t go for what he wants from women. Don’t fall into the trap of thinking that you can’t be attractive to women for who you are, when you’re successful.

      1. I tried to hook my SIL up with one in CLT and he was just “average looking” “6 or 7” that besides his income was a great guy, funny as hell, and would do anything for his woman. Sigh in the last 12 months instead she has dated 10 losers, the best of which lasted 6 weeks. I’ve given up on her.

  71. In my own personal experience, most women, particularly when they are young and at the peak of their attractiveness, don’t care what a man does for a living or what he has going for him. Instead, those women just want to play the field and have a good time. A lot of women will spend years with deadbeat men who are poor potential marriage partners simply because they are enjoying the moment and don’t want to be with a “nice” or “boring” man who works too much while building his career.

    Women have a tremendous amount of power over men, particularly when they are young and hot. If they are smart and mature, they use it wisely. It astounds me how many women squander this power…

        1. Please. You’re not God, and you have no idea what’s going to happen in Maggie’s life!

    1. Jim; It astounded me how all the ‘nice, successful’ men rejected me in my 20’s and went for butterfaces and obese, plain looking women, thereby squandering the wonderful life they could have had waking up to my beauty every day. They also have uglier children now, all because of fragile male egos.

  72. This topic, in general, is one yet to be taken very seriously. I’m not sure what miracles were at play, but I was finally released from the grasp of this type of situation.
    I don’t use words like deadbeat, I don’t generalize men as bad. That minimizes the very specific pain and emotional damage associated with dating one particularly bad man.

    The “why” I dated him was stated above. I didn’t know he was bad until after the point of which “walking away” didn’t feel like a choice. Where walking away felt like giving up on somebody you loved. Where you still thought of him as a good man working to be a better man.
    And while you were digging yourself in deeper, distracted by the practice of unconditional love, this man reveals his true self. A full coming out party, as the very bad man he is.
    You’re then confronted by a sickening reality that most of the time you’ve been together, all he was truly working on were improvements on his manipulation skills.
    You’ve even discovered where he can’t manipulate, he intimidates.

    And yet, u continue to stay. Loneliness and unworthy feelings are now the only reality you know. Not just the result of this mans heinous carelessness. More damaging was the shaming by loved ones and general school of thought that only a flawed woman would choose that.
    You go back him. More than a few times. To the thing that was bad, but oddly comforting in comparison to the dismissal by the “safe” people.

    There was no reward. Down on their luck men in this thread can spin yarns all day about the insecure girl who loves to be mistreated. But it only serves to reveal their personal insecurities irrelevant to this discussion.

    1. TRACY MILLER

      I love this. I’m in that predicament right now, trying to figure out how to get out because I’ve dug myself so deeply into it. Also second guessing my insticts, not sure if he’s for real or just a professional manipulator and a good liar. Your comment helped me a lot, and I do understand that part of the reason I stay is that I don’t feel worthy of being treated any better. Also hoping things will get better as they once were in the early days together. But how to change that feeling? My conscious mind tells me that yes, I deserve better. I’m a good looking woman with no problems getting dates. I have a decent job and work 50+ hours a week, raised my children completely by myself after I divorced, which tells me that I’m strong. But I keep letting the loser manipulate me…..or is it that he really does love me and is misguided on how things are supposed to be? This is what I battle every day anymore.

    2. CHiggins, thankfully you are released. You put so much care and thought into your response. It was surgical and poetic at the same time. I hope that you continue to find healing and, beyond that, all the beauty and adventure that life has to offer. I hope to hear more from you.

    3. C Higgins,

      I see so much of my relative’s current predicament in your situation right now. She’s with a grade A loser and I’m being nice. He’s always “gonna start a business”, “gonna get the current owner to take his advice”, and yet this creep hates people and refuses to work on his flaws. He swears everyone else is the problem and makes one excuse after another when he is eventually fired. He lived off of her and had her working two jobs and bugging her parents for money for years. His own parents won’t have anything to do with him, but he blames them for everything. If her parents had said no she would have been free, but they were worried about what he’d do to her so they caved in…repeatedly. He’s sunk his claws in deep as a result.

      She’s wasted damn near a decade with a manipulative sociopath, which is what I think you’re dealing with. As soon as she doesn’t agree with him on something he’s making threats, insulting and intimidating her. He’s gaslighting her, telling her she’s dumb when he couldn’t even finish school at all.

      He’s arrogant, claiming no one else can run their company like he can, and of course there’s no telling what he’s done to her credit. She’s worked so hard as subsidizing this parasite she even defends her abuser too. She was ready to leave him at one point when she found out one of his outrageously expensive “business trips” was an expensive booty call where he was rejected. The other woman figured him out and when my relative threw his crap out he came back after the plane landed at 2 in the morning making threats. She took that piece of garbage back and her room mate told them both to leave. It’s insane to talk to the people who have dealt with him. He hasn’t done a thing he promises to, is incompetent in his work, is arrogant, and assumes he’ll just be a millionaire overnight.

      The worst part is I’m starting a business so I can walk away from my current job, but I can’t tell the relative I worry about because her parasitic sociopath of a boyfriend will come calling. He’ll begin demanding he get paid for a job I’d never let him do in a million years and my patience is done.

      After her parasite cheated on her she swore she’d never go back, but because she had a long list of pointless retail jobs and nothing in the degree field she worked so hard for she’s financially stuck. She won’t listen to any of the common sense advice her family is giving her. It’s always “*his name* says you have to do advertising this way only or it won’t work” or “*he* says I can’t do that, I don’t have enough experience to do that” and more. It is maddening because he’s abused her and indoctrinated her to the point she can’t even think for herself without approval.

      Not only do you walk away from scum like that C Higgins you drop a nuke to wipe if off the face of the earth. You do deserve better no matter what you or others think. I don’t know how you got away from him but I’d love to know.

      – Sarah Beth

  73. Why does anyone care? People do stupid things, gender’s irrelevant.
    Why does any of this matter to anyone?

  74. Here is an idea….women need to learn that they don’t need men to make them feel “safe” and “secure”. This should be a huge red flag that she is probably a really insecure individual that will date a tall, bad boy, with muscles and tattoos over any decent, sane human being and then turn around and blame men for her irresponsible behavior.

    1. Bingo! This just proves that woman makes bad decisions when selecting or choosing a male partner or companion like a “bad boy as a mate. They’ll complain that there are no good men while in their younger selves but, the only time they want a “Good guy” is when they all hit their late 40s or 50s “all washed and used up on mileage” after their children are adults! It’s too late for that …. Start making the right decisions ladies!

  75. Chris Mitchell

    I struggled in my early 20’s, suffered a nasty divorce from a cheater and was a single mom for many years. One rule I learned, if a man doesn’t have a job when you meet him, he might give you a sad story but if he isn’t back to work in a reasonable amount of time, don’t waste your time. Don’t waste your time on Mr. Handsome who may have been spoiled by women all his life. The guy that romances you might not be the right one either if he doesn’t come through on promises. Sometimes it turns out the guy who maybe isn’t Mr. Handsome but is nice looking and polite, treats you like you are important to him, comes through on his promises the best way he knows how and probably isn’t romantic but maybe a little shy, or the guy that doesn’t draw in women like a piece of meat would with sharks? THAT is the guy a woman should look more closely at. I know because I married a guy like that about 31 years ago and he is my best friend, my husband. Men treating women less than well may work in the movies but not in real life. If you have a male friend who isn’t gay, take a second look at him girls!

    1. so you discriminate huh what about you having a job or does that only apply to men while you vegitate on the couch, really though i dont have a job, but i can tell you this i have a buisness which i started while i was unemployed and now with no help from women i employ people , thanks not for your help , take your selfish ideology somewhere else lady

        1. Except the ones who are already married or who marry rich guys their own age because now they’ve had all that surgery they can get them.

          1. I was a stripper for 8 years! Iam very confident! I dated great men. Have a greal man! I had to take care of my mother whose mentally ill! Also pay for college myself! So NO NOT ALL STRIPPERS HAVE LOW SELF ESTEM. NOT THIS X-DANCER! YES INDEED THERE ARE some that have low self estem& do date losers. THIS IS NOT THE CASE FOR ALL OF THEM!

            1. I cannot believe all the miserable, women hating, men in this thread. I can kind of guess why they arent getting hotties.

    1. I don’t even know how to process this comment, which is an all-to-common perception. I am objectively above average looking and intelligence and higher earning than most men. My partner of 13 years is a “nice guy” who is helpful, funny, smart and thoughtful but for the love of God can’t earn a living. For 13 years I’ve been encouraging him. I bought him a sign for his truck when he worked for himself doing construction. Never could get more than part time hours. I let him move in so he could get caught up on bills he owed and get back on his feet. I went back to school to become a dentist so he wanted to go back to school too. He became a chiropractor. Now 4 years after being a chiropractor, he still can’t earn a living and has half a million in debt. Hello don’t mean he’s just lowered income than me. I mean he literally cannot pay his expenses. He can’t or won’t find a job working for someone so he started his own office twice now. He cant seem to get enough patients and when he does he can’t figure out how to get paid from insurance. Meanwhile I spent thousands helping him get his first office set up. He doesn’t appreciate advice on how to build his practice. I started buying properties and paying him to do maintenance, so I am actually his main source of income. He has way more leisure time during the weekday than I do because I’m busting my hump so that there will be a retirement nest egg. But he has nothing saved, is in huge debt, and yet each day seems to do very little to market his clinic or get the word out to patients who could use his care. His a good chiropractor but a terrible business man. From the beginning, I always paid for both of us when we go put. Even before I met him I have always paid my way because I never wanted to be indebted to anyone. From my twenties to now. I am fifty. I never expected anyone to pay my my way. So you judge me saying well you must be ugly. I am attractive even if I say so myself. So you say well you must be a loser with low self esteem. That is easy for you to say. But what about the fact that he is a genuinely nice person and I genuinely care about him and want the best for him. He loves me and I don’t want him to be hurt. I want him to thrive. I don’t want to find someone else. I just want him to pull his own weight. Men like you judge women who wanttheir man to earn decent living. You call them gold diggers. If they settle you call them losers or ugly. Sounds like you just hate women. I am not looking for him to be rich. I just don’t want to be a sugar mamma. He is also 50 by the way. But when my mom and brother were terminally ill, he went with me to care for them. He’s not put partying or flirting with other women. The problem, by providing for him I feel like his mom or older sister. I love him but I can’t feel sexual for him because I have this sort of care-taking role. I have always tried to work from the assumption we are equal. And he does have skills I will never have which I admire. He is always available. Like a good girlfriend. But I don’t want to sleep with my girlfriends either. I am not frigid. He wants sex all the time and I’m always making excuses. He tells me it is always new for him like the first time and always finds me hot. He is skillful on bed to his credit. But it’s always a matter of me giving in and letting. It’s never me wanting to tear his clothes off. Even though he too is exceptionally very good looking. I am writing because I honestly want input here. Life is getting shorter and it doesn’t look like his job is ever going to be more than a hobby. I can’t marry him or I will be liable for all his debts. From an outsider’s perspective, what do see as the problem?

      1. Oh. Two choices: either you stay with him for the friendship and accept that he will not pull his weight, or you end it. I hate using the word, but you are acting as an enabler. (Hey. I wouldn’t be reading this if I wasn’t experiencing similar problems). So what’s the payoff for making all these sacrifices. Is it impossible for people to – maybe that should be “women – to be individuals and not get sucked into the societal trap of having to have a man? Like the way that too many men believe they must procreate in order to be “men,” even as they abandon the mothers and the children?

        My dearest relative has gotten herself into a situation that is incomprehensible to me. He’s a “good” enough guy. But his life story sent up so many red flags about him – nothing criminal or anything like that – but he seems to function only through the women he has been with. Anyway…

        The thing to do is live separately. I wonder if you met this man when you were at the top of your game, so to speak… what would this type be? Undefined as individuals. Never individuated. Not “whole?” Whatever they are, they don’t belong in a live-in situation. You wouldn’t go into business with someone like this, right?

        1. Thank you for the reply, Jake. I didn’t see these replies until now. Also, I hope you have resolved your situation and I would be interested to know what it entailed.

          1. Well, my dearest relative is marrying her guy. End of story. End of family. Cutting everyone off that won’t abide this delusion. Heartbreaking.

      2. Jacqueline Jones

        Sounds like you’re codependent need someone to take care of. I didn’t hear mention of children. Also, I hear your tone soften as you spoke about boyfriend helping with caring for your parents. I get the sense you took on a lot of responsibility as a child. Not, to mention we have been condition as women to care for others before ourselves. Your boyfriend
        Doesnt maintain anything because he knows you will take care of everything. He is using your weakness and strengths against you. There is no excuse for his grown ass healthy self to not be ablessed to make a living for himself. You have but two choices stay with him and let him teAR you down from all you’ve worked to acquire or let his ass go. It’s not even a question if he will do it to some else yes bease it’s plenty women out here struggling with codependence. We have been condition to pit everyone before ourselves that doing it any other way seems unnatural. Get a puppy less headaches. You should seek counseling to get yourself help. He’s not your problem your choices are. Stop settling because you’re thinking he is going to be with someone else. He’s not going jto j change and if. He does know he didn’t do it for you. Go get what makes you happy! Hell, get nice guy that can hold his own and have some mad crazy sex! You will forget all about nice guy broke lazy ass! I look forward to an update!

        1. Jacqueline Jones, I didn’t expect to get replies and never checked back in until now! Thank you for responding so thoughtfully! You had me laughing and also cringing because you have a funny way of pointing things out and also because you cut to the heart of some things that I have to admit are true. You are wise and generous. The update is (if you are still out there): I still go to work 9+ hours per day 5 days a week to a stressful clinic and come home exhausted. I bought a house which we do not live in, but which I wanted him to renovate so that we could move into it. The deal was that I would not pay him for the renovation because he would live there with me when it was done. I felt that if he was providing this valuable contribution, then I could justify being the only earner. He did a chunk of the renovation. He works on it a little bit on the weekends and wants me to work with him. I do but I am exhausted. During the week he goes to his office and sees zero to three patients per week. (I imagine George Castanza under his desk. ) I see at least 100 patients per week to put it into perspective. I don’t know what else he does during the week, because he is making so little progress on the house, which is completely uninhabitable. I will admit that if I ask him to do errands for me while I’m at work, he generally will do them. If I do call it quits, it is hard to imagine taking this leap. I guess I am scared. But also just plain exhausted. I feel like I can barely get a breath above water as it is. And also worried for what will happen to him. I do love him as a friend and family member. His father just got a bad diagnosis and will not be around long. I should be there during this tough time as he was for us. If I leave, he might go into a deep depression. Or, as you said he might turn around and find someone else or become successful! That’s so funny you said that because a part of me actually thought that! Sure, as soon as I leave he becomes the beloved most-sought-after chiropractor in town, but I didn’t have the faith to believe in him and left him while he was down! Ironically my first two husbands (cringe that sounds so bad that I had two husbands) became independent and respectable after we parted ways! OMG! That sounds even worse and it is all true! I am always ashamed of the fact that I had two husbands and that they were both losers when I was with them and are now successful. OMG! It IS me! This is so illuminating and so awful to realize! It stung when you said “He’s not your problem; your choices are.” As for children, he has two grown girls, one of whom is married with a baby. So he is a grandpa now. They have tried to imply I am grandma but I am not feeling it. I never played mom to them and never married their father so I am not going to jump in as a third pseudo grandmother. I have a grown son who is getting married in the Fall in Hawaii. That’s the other thing. I will have to pay for his trip to Hawaii and am guessing that he and his x-wife may be wanting me to pay for their two daughters and their hubbies also to go to this destination wedding. I can’t not at least take him if we are a couple. That’s money I could be contributing to my own son and his bride or to my own student loan repayment. On the other hand, for his daughter’s wedding, I paid for the flowers, in addition to a generous cash wedding gift (the card signed by both of us of course) and shower gift and he wasn’t able to contribute financially. He instead made some (admittedly very pretty) decorations out of tree branches that he gathered.
          Dear God, so let’s say I do end this anyway. The worst case scenario: he sinks into a deep depression, his father illness progresses, I am not part of the family during this tough time and am cast as the coldest-hearted witch. But with my track record, all indicators are that he will actually be BETTER OFF WITHOUT ME! So really, for HIS sake and my own, I should pull out. Even though I love him. And BECAUSE I love him. Ms Jaqueline, you have given me a lot to think out loud about. Thank you!

      3. I feel like I just read my own life through you, granted I’m 32 and don’t have a career going for myself yet. I was a professional photographer 9 years and a nanny 5, then developed cancer due to my high levels of stress, 80 hour work weeks, and 3 hrs sleep nightly since age 17. I’m very attractive (guys won’t shut up about it). To me, men are babies. They are needy , clingy, don’t want to work, won’t work, and cry because I am a strong independent attravtive woman and they are desperate for me. In my past, if I ever dated any, they’d make my life a living hell. They need full time care, emotionally and mentally. They make me feel like I’m in a prison and I end up wanting to scream and run. I stay for a while out of guilt. I get nothing out of relationships because I refuse to carry a full grown man through life.
        But back to why I relate to you. I am currently dating someone. He of course doesn’t have a job. He of course needs me. He of course wants to marry me. I am now finding myself planning to open a business just to support both of us in life. The difference with him is that I do love him. Just like you’re guy, he’s excellent In bed, loving, always there for me (like a girlfriend usually is for her man). He stayed with Me in the hospital 4 days. He is loyal to me.
        I don’t need or want any man, I’m very attractive and sexy, I cherish alone time, I’m ambitious, smart, fun, and I care about others. I got caught up in this situation being with a man who makes me look less attractive due to the added stress. I’m actually giving up my looks for him…so I just want to say what a bunch of bitter losers to say these girls must not be attractive. I’m giving up my supermodel looks (I’ve been told that countless times), all because I love someone and am there for him. People are shallow, cold, and judgemental.

        1. Wow, Kim. I just came back to this board and realized you and others had reached out. Thank you so much for responding. I can feel your frustration. And your exhaustion! I had never though about it that way, giving up your looks for the relationship. But in fact that is exactly what is happening. When you are basically working the work of two people, you are burning the candle at both ends and the stress eats away at you. Jesus. I didn’t even think about that part of it. God I hope your cancer has been curable. And now I am going to give you some advice that for some reason is easier to say than to hear. It is something my Mom said up until she passed last year: Take care of yourself because no on else will. Sad, but true. You have a right to take care of yourself, too. Is he taking care of you in other ways? Is there a reason he can’t work? Because if he is able to work and isn’t working, then…isn’t he, in a way, actually killing you a little at a time with all this added stress? Not in an evil, ax-murder sort of way, but as a possibly sweet and cute but needy leech sucking you dry because it’s the only way he knows how to survive sort of way?

      4. You are co-dependent. Gads, the trainwreck is inevitable…
        The day will arrive when ye must get rid of the entitled or passive aggressive bum.

    2. I think your words are ugly! I think just by your words your UGLY!ARE U 5 YEARS OLD?? U THINK STRIPPERS ARE UGLY? WTF THERE’S THOSANDS AND THOUSANDS OF EXOTIC DANCERS IN THE UNITED STATES. THEY ARE DEFINITELY NOT ALL UGLY! LET’S SEE YOUR PICTURE??? WHO ARE U TO SAY ALL STRIPPERS ARE UGLY??? HAVE U TALKED TO A STRIPPERS BEEN TO A STRIP CLUB? WOMEN STRI0 FOR MANY DIFFERENT reasons. So for u to just say strippers are ugly. Shows your age ur a child! Grow up& your probably a very ugly person yourself to say that about ALL STRIPPERS!

    3. I am married to a looser absolutely miserable and very beautiful. I have 3 kids 15 19 and 9. I am 36 he is 44. He has a job and everything but he just can’t get his finances together he pretty much doesn’t do anything with me and absolutely miserable and feel so alone it sucks because I am not the cheating type there has been lots of guys that have looked at me even Rich guys but I have never once cheated on him you just want to friend you know but I know what that will lead to so I just tend to pass it by and live miserable for the rest of my life so no you are wrong not all women are ugly that go out with losers. It sucks. I just can’t cheat this is my second husband my first husband we were young and dumb it’s really hard for me sometimes to see people happy and their families sometimes I just leave and just take midnight walks or I’ll go see my family just to be happy my kids get me through to I do love him but not in love with him anymore and I don’t know what to do like I said through sickness and in health.

      1. You should’ve left the loser years ago. You only live once and you’re wasting your life away with a pathetic loser. It’s never too late, dump him and get a winner.

  76. Hi guys,
    Here are my 2 cents.

    These thoughts are related to the article but a bit diverging at times.

    I read several articles on women empowerment, women issues, feminism, etc. Some of the conclusion which I have drawn are:

    In the past 5 decades after the feminist movement and higher female labor participation there has been a sea change in how selection of a partner/wife takes place.
    This is due to increased social and economic mobility where people born in lower income groups can make their way to higher levels through hard work. Again this happened throughout history but earlier the barriers were almost insurmountable. Now the barriers are much less rigid and to an extent almost non-existent.

    The ideal way to understand this is my dividing the population into different percentile groups by earning. Top 20%, 60-80%, 40-60% etc.
    Some basic generalized assumptions (should be correct in 95% or more cases according to my experience and observation):
    Men like to earn more than their female partners.
    Women like their partner to earn more than them.

    This factor affects two groups greatly:
    A) Women who are in the top 20% earning band. These women need to find partners in the same profession so both can equally share towards a higher living lifestyle. However men in this band might rather go for a women with a bit lesser income so the career of the male partner is prioritized. (I am a male and do not believe there is anything bad in this thought)

    B) Male who are in the bottom 20% income band or deadbeats according to the article. These would be unemployed, minimum wage or temporary contracts. They generally cannot find partners based on income, intellect, etc. and hence have to rely on charm, creativity, etc. But again this works for a smaller time length. Women in early 20s might go with this man out of curiosity,to have new experience,etc.etc. , but by the time she is in late 20s or early 30s they would rather be single or look for higher earning partners.

    Hence the current system pushes males to earn higher so they can select from a larger group of females. It disincentives higher earning females by reducing their chances of finding a male.

    From a historical perspectives when social mobility was almost non-existent and there was great class hierarchy, every male/female would search for a partner within their earning/ family earning group. This would protect their wealth over a longer term.
    This arrangement provided partners for people in every band, even males in the lowest band.

    However within the current system there is a constant struggle to move upwards. AGAIN nothing bad in this situation: it has given us social mobility, more inventiveness, entrepreneurship, better quality of life, more goods,etc. But it also leads to :Faster pace of life, lower cohesiveness within society, constant jumping from one partner to other(both for males and females),etc,etc…

    By the way liked the article very much.
    MATT

    1. Raymond P Kot II, Esq.

      So the essence of what your are saying is the American way of life is anti-stable family. America led the path to social mobility and also divorce and feminism, both of which are anti-male. So for lower social economic status men, leaving the North America may be in their best social interest, but not in their social welfare interest (American welfare is near the best in the world). The only way around the divorce issue is to live in sin, never marry.

      1. @aymond

        Lower social economic status men in non western socities tend to fare worse in the dating game. Families typically have strong veto powers when it comes to marriage: being poor will at best delay marriage by years until the guy is at least stable or the bride’s better suitors stop coming by.

        Chances nuch higher theyll get married but likely to the least attractive women since the poor, good looking ones tend to marry up

      2. Feminism isn’t anti-male – repeat ad nauseum. Certainly anti-ignorant male who think that’s the case.

    2. Actually Matt, your wrong about the economically stratified society providing women for every men.

      Instead what you see is that men are forced to marry later when they have achieved financial stability leaving young men screwed since few can compete in assets.

      Its still a rat race but the young women arent getting paired with their same age ccohorts.

  77. kimberleigh

    Only insecure women date losers. Either it’s a victim/savior type of relationship or these chicks think that’s all they deserve. Stop being a doormat for some loser who doesn’t even appreciate you. Because if you let it continue, your loser boyfriend is going to use and abuse you…

  78. Lee McCullough

    Women go out with dead beats and losers because they have no self respect. A man can spot the difference between a woman with self respect, (a lady) and a skank in the blink of an eye. And any man worth his salt won’t have any thing to do with a sleazy skank. That doesn’t leave the vast majority of women out there with a whole lot of choice. I often see posts asking where all the “nice guys” are? We’re avoiding you, honey. Big time. You didn’t really think we were going to take you home to meet our mothers did you? TMF

    1. This comment doesn’t help me. You assume I am a skank / sleaze because I am stuck in a relationship for 16 years now with an otherwise “nice guy” has no means to pay for any of our common expenses? Meanwhile I pay all the bills and pay when we go out. I make quite a bit but am constantly working my ass off. I saw potential in him because he seemed bright and witty and I thought he was kind. I thought he had the capability so that he would be able to come to contribute. But he keeps managing to be underemployed and unable to contribute. I feel sorry for him so don’t leave. But what the hell? How does that make me a sleaze/skank?

  79. This happened to me! I was with a once working man who made money, bought me things, while we worked at the same place. I made more than he but he supported his child, and helped with bills while living with me. That all changed once he got fired, started his drug habit again. he then decided while he made absolutely no money to cheat, lie, steal, etc and that’s when I had enough. Weird that someone who had nothing and I gave him everything would do that.

  80. It happens less often than men going out with gold diggers. The number of women who pay alimony to men is still a small fraction of men paying alimony to women. Men pay about 97 percent of all alimony. So you should support men that dont want to pay for everything in our modern age where women make just as much money as males.

  81. I am sooo tired of hearing how women that date deadbeats have low self-esteem, think they don’t deserve any better etc. That is complete BS. Okay, maybe some women do, but when a woman keeps picking the same type of loser, she is getting something out of it for herself.

    My former best friend for thirty years has picked guys with the following qualities: No money, no education, dead beat dad, drug addict, done time in prison, uses everyone and anyone, wants meaningless drug-induced hard-core sex. Get the picture? Oh and don’t forget that the guy has to have a slim athletic body, even though she is lazy and out of shape. She is very shallow. I agree with Victoria, it is about wanting control…with a minimal amount of effort.

    At first, I thought, she must have some underlying self-esteem issues. But one after another deadbeat came and went, and she pursued all of them like a horny housecat. I began to realize that the men she chooses are the ones she wants. She gets a feeling of power and superiority over them. And if there is trouble, with the relationship, or even the law etc., she can use the guy as a scapegoat and blame it all on him, because who would blame her when he is obviously such a flawed person and she is so superior to him? Every problem is HIS FAULT. That’s all there is to it. When is someone going to write a book about that?

    1. “and she pursued all of them like a horny housecat. I began to realize that the men she chooses are the ones she wants.”

      So she’s just an idiot? This is why I don’t feel sorry for her.

  82. I am a natural fixer in life. I have an excellent job and an awesome family. I fell hard for someone recently that I felt was my mate for life. At first he showed me his home and land. He told me about his child (I am a single mother myself). He had a huge amount of land and a family business. I thought my prayers of finding someone that was hard working like me were over. We enjoyed so many of the same things, and were like peas in a pod. Then one day…. I WOKE UP. I noticed after a while… He has a family business that his mother runs. His mother controlled his money, and paid all the bills for his home and land from the family business. I would work all day, and he would nap most of the day. So basically after time, I realized. He didn’t work. He sat around and watched TV and napped all day. His once very nice home ended up dirty and very unclean after a while, until his mother visited once a month, then it would be clean again. He wasn’t willing to clean his house, and/or cook dinner, breakfast, or lunch. There was never food at his house. He also had never been married. He had a child, but never married the mother. His child was a demon when he visited. The man had so much resentment for the childs mother that he let him get away with ridiculous things so that when he returned him to his mother, the child misbehaved with her. Then it just kept going on and on in this relationship. I kept doing more and more and more. We began arguing because he never had money, but nevery wanted to get a job. Then one day…. During a heated argument…. He was stating something that I had said previously, and was using it against me as he had always done before. But this time…. He called me a joke. It was not the worst words that he had ever called me.. But it was the truest words he had ever said. I was a joke. It was me.. I was the one that let this lowlife person consume me. I was the local joke in town and with my old friends (who he wouldn’t let me talk to anymore). People all around me couldn’t believe that I had fallen for someone like that. They were laughing at me and not with me anymore becuase I had gone out with this individual. I was a joke. It was the best words that he ever could have said. I cut the relationship immediately and walked away from that person. I have looked back and do miss him, but not alot. It was time to move forward and that person was not for me. I missed out on a year and a half of my life. And that is time that I will never get back, but it is the best lesson of a year and a half of my life. It taught me that my values were higher than others and I deserved better.

  83. Being a complete and total loser, I’d like to no where to find these women. Is there a special dating site I can go to?

    1. Yeah. POF. Just put up pics of yourself with no shirt showing off your tats while standing in front of your car – you’ll do just fine!

      1. Hahaha…

        As an average nice (but not doormat) guy who tried POF in the past sans shirtless/car/tattoo pics, this is absolutely accurate. B-Dwag, it’s very important you lie about your height too if not at least 6′ tall. I am, and even that’s not good enough for some on there. If you’re going to wear a shirt…MMA, Affliction or Ed Hardy will surely score you extra points. I know, I know. Their profiles say they aren’t into that stuff but most of them are lying!

        What little attention I did get on that site was from the typical women you’ll find on there – the female loser.

        Even if you can find one that doesn’t show signs of a drama princess suffering from BPD at first (let alone kids, tattoos everywhere, etc.), chances are, they’re likely still logging in and waiting for that moment to ‘upgrade’ from you to the next sap. No doubt many men do it too I’m sure.

        POF is a great site if you’re looking for a short-term fling. It’s true, crazy women are great in bed. That said, don’t go jumping head first into serious relationships anytime soon. I tried, with a very attractive women I couldn’t believe was single let alone using a dating site. Two months later, it became obvious why. Bat-shat crazy with depression, daddy issues, etc.

        Thankfully, I’ve found a great woman offline who doesn’t think she’s part of a reality show and is happy with me as I am.

        Thanks for the chuckle LOL – brings back memories of a time I hope never to return to.

  84. Independent

    @ Very Serious: You are completely wrong. The majority of us women are not high maintenance, we pay our own bills and all we want is a man who will do the same!!!

    1. You women should consider yourselves lucky today since the women years ago along with their men had to struggle to make ends meat.

      1. And working 40-60 or more hours a week plus taking care of the home and kids is a walk in the park?

        1. “And working 40-60 or more hours a week plus taking care of the home and kids is a walk in the park?”

          Definitely not. But interestingly, 30% of prime working age (25-54) women don’t even work (vs just 10% of men), and of those prime working age women that do, only 78% work full time (vs 91% for men), and of those that do work full time, they work on average 5 fewer hours a week than men that work full time. In other words, the # of women in America – even in prime working age – working ~50-60 hours a week, is quite small (while very common for men). The #s are more stark if you don’t look just as prime working age. Personally, I wished my wife worked. I’d be able to retire at 42ish rather than 46-48. She spent 3 years begging me to let her quit b/c she hated corporate America.

    2. HonestAnswer

      With so many very stuck up and high maintenance women out there these days, that makes them real Losers.

    3. @Independant

      You say: “The majority of us women are not high maintenance, we pay our own bills and all we want is a man who will do the same!!!

      Answer: If that’s the case, men and women should stay in their own places “a home” alone instead of taking care of bills together while still in a relationship…..according to your logic! …lol!

      1. Well you can grow very old all alone with a bunch of cats which would be the very best option for you.

  85. I lived with a deadbeat pothead woman for 8 years. I loved her so much because she was intelligent, witty, and had a passion for many of the things I liked. The only problem was that she was extremely lazy and never applied herself. She expected me to do everything. She never offered any emotional support and ended up being more of a roommate than a lover, and a bad roommate at that. She would sit around and play MMOs constantly and not want to do anything else. I tried to play with her but I didn’t have the time to spare and when I did I was too mentally fatigued from work so I would sit with her and ask questions about the game. I showed interest in it and would congratulate her accomplishments. She then started acting like she didnt want me around. I noticed her hiding conversations from me. She was becoming friends with her guildmate and they talked on Skype every day. I figured there was no harm in it because he lived all the way in Sweden. I was wrong. I caught them havung Skype sex one night. She revealed to me her plan to move to Sweden with him abd they would meet on Valentines day. I felt so bad. I’m now in a relationship with my highschool sweetheart. She treats me well and is more responsible but she’s not quite as smart. Her treating me better makes me happy but I still feel like something is missing. I like a woman who I can debate politics or philosophy with, not someone who debates about what happens on Real Housewives. She treats me better though, so im happy in this relationship. I can keep the philosophical debates for my friends.

    1. She sounds really feminine to me. Though, maybe you should encourage her to do what you have specified was the probable outcome. If she is so smart, why doesn’t she realize that her replacement “relationship” is totally untenable? How many “relationships” that start out like hers actually succeed-very few.

  86. Johnny Lahmon

    Men are dogs ? No, we’re not. This website is so misandrist, it’s ridicules. This is oppressive to men.

    1. Men’s behavior is the result of female selection pressures over millenia. Most women will only have sex with men who behave certain ways and most of those behaviors are correlated with Testosterone levels. It just so happens that those behaviors are are also correlated with a host of other behaviors that make actual relationships impossible.

  87. People go out with “losers” because they don’t need to hold themselves accountable. Their own less than decent behavior is thereby justified. Being with a good person removes your own justification for being selfish. The dead beat loser won’t dump you for joining them in the gutter.

    Also, girls who only like bad boys are full of it. Real bad guys don’t want you to know they’re bad, see … they’re up to something …. usually for $$$. They’re looking to keep a low profile & stay out of jail. Like good men (not nice guys) they are busy.
    Some real outlaws do embody being a bad boy, like real bikers. They don’t have time for a girls BS either. Their reputation precedes them.

    The rebel they like is really a show off willing to play a girls silly games, they also are the type to attract the attention of the police, ending up in jail & doing the whole rebel image thing. The girls who like bad guys don’t even know who the real bad guys are. They just want some attention. They deserve each other.

  88. Yeah this article sounds 100% Legit! I feel bad for a lot of these girls, especially the ones that have to have my leftovers, my ex is a dead beat daddy, cower, fake, pedophile, mentally slow, loser. I mean this guy blackmailed me to stay by his side and threaten to kill himself if I left him (he has scars in his arms for me to blackmail me), he even got me pregnant on purpose to wrap me around his finger (I know this is personal but he never let me know when he did “you know”), when he had me there and I needed him, he cheated “he didn’t think I would find out”. I love our child but wow!… I feel so bad our baby has to have such poor excuse of a man for a father.

    I would never date a dead beat father! I think so low of men who don’t take care of their own child, PEOPLE you can ever trust that type of men if they do that to their own blood and flesh imagine what they would do to you. They just want to get laid and have fun also have some help with the bills (if they are loser without any higher education).

    FOR girls who date dead beats; It is so true that dead beat fathers make up a lot of lies and make their child’s mother sound like the bad guy, like they are crazy, and they say that they don’t let them see their kids. When really this is all a way to cover up for the scum bags and loser that they are. Ugh makes me sick!

    1. females won’t come out and say it but for some of them, it’s unfortunate, it may well be that the loser is what they want or their insecure…..

  89. wondering????

    I see this girl I know,
    shes a letter carrier,and is attractive. shes ben thru two divorces and now i see her with a scroungy guy thats unkept and no personality,and an attitude,
    she says hi to me in the market, but shes with him and and i can tell that he’s bad fron no talking and scroungy looks’
    what is wrong with this woman anyway.
    Im so tired of these woman around here that settle for low life’s,

  90. Very Serious

    with so many very High Maintenance women that are out there today, they are the ones that are very horrible to meet because they really think they are all that. most of these type of women are looking for a man with a very large bank account, and just can’t accept many of us men for who we are. I would certainly say that they are really the Big Losers. very obvious why many of us men can’t meet a decent woman anymore, and we’re Not To Blame.

    1. It’s not about a large bank account… It’s about pulling your weight… You can’t rely on Ione person in a ship… You both have to play your role and take care off your business because what if something happens and your partner becomes incompasitated Abd that partner took care of everything and the other was a mooch… Respect yourself and take care off your crap so you can take care of your crap with someone else whi takes care of their crap and wants to help you like you help them

  91. I know I am really late replying to this, but as a female who was engaged to a deadbeat, I feel the need to comment.

    I met Mr X on a music video set that I was a makeup artist for. At the time he seemed like everything I at 22 (albeit a very young 22) wanted. He worked full time, liked music, and was a Goth. I didn’t feel superior to him due to his lack of education or work (I had qualifications and completed secondary school, he dropped out), and I did not feel the need to ‘change’ him. I encouraged him to pursue his talent in art however, and remember telling him that working in a chafe at minimum wage was only fine if he intended on becoming the worlds best barrista, or it was his passion. I genuinely enjoyed spending time with Mr X and he was originally very emotionally supportive. Problems arose when we both went back to study. He refused to get a job, and mooched which resulted in us (me) going to in to NZD25k of debt. Not an ideal situation. Eventually I realised that at 32 his ways were essentially set in stone. He was happy living off of the student benefit, spending everything on alcohol and partying, not focussing on a school and failing. So I left. I knew I could not change him, and other than general support and encouragement partners give, never did. I am very self confidant, but didn’t look down on him. I guess it came down to being young and stupid and wanting a goth boyfriend.
    I am now 27, and am still dealing with the consequences of being with a deadbeat. My studies have gone on hold as I put paying back debt at upmost importance (most came from him not paying rent in favor of partying and getting tattoos) and have nearly payed off everything working a job I hate. I can’t believe how stupid I was, but it taught me incredible life lessons and has given me rocket fuel to try a succeed in the future, despite being 3 steps backwards.

    Sorry for the essay. I have dyspraxia so hope I expressed my view clearly.

    1. Thanks for sharing Stacia.

      It’s common to look back at our younger selves and ask what were we thinking.

      Also, I wonder if simple horniness plays a roll when we are young, overriding rationality.

  92. I just want to voice another view of this debate. Some women like losers because they like to be in control. It is not the loser “using them for sex” as stated above, but the other way around. Not all women have bad self esteem or are trying to fix a man. Why is it that a man can date any loserish woman he wants yet no one posts about that? Yet if a woman chooses to sleep with a man with little life ambition but a great body, then all of a sudden she “can’t let go” and “has a mommy complex”. It’s a double standard. If men can use women for sex then I (a woman) can do the same too!

    1. Jayson Johnson

      I agree. My ex is love with a loser with no job, and living with friends. Despite our kids and home. Her emotional connection to this person more important than family. We’ve talked about getting back together, but she still goes on dates while dealing with this other low rent guy. It’s really depressing. Maybe she a loser too., that I should not got involved with in the first place

    2. Well, that’s a theory, but there are plenty who are with guys that actually aren’t above average in looks or physique. You know, maybe that’s important to you, and that’s fine, but I don’t think that’s what anyone is really talking about here.

    3. Besides, he’s not talking about someone just sleeping with a guy and accusing her of not being able to “let go.” He’s talking about someone who actually CAN’T let go. You’re comparing two different things. He’s talking about emotional attachment, and you’re talking about just plain physical attraction.

    1. Julia Lewis

      I want to talk with them. I am done with the kind of shit for men that have been swarming around me for decades. DONE. Then I have to kick their asses to shreds in order for them to become better men? After the reject finds that he is no longer worthy to even know my name? Why are you men as stupid arrogant as you all appear to be. If you think that their are 13 women to your every man on this planet then go find them. I am the 14th that doesn’t want you. Go with the skank you are seeking and stay away from me. I am tired of training you were to shit and piss upon is not going to be ever me. You learn with the bitch that will put up with your scumloserness. Not me. I am done with you pieces of shit for men. You belong in your Scumshit Planet, not with myself. She is that idiot that puts up with your continued abuse of her. She is that dumbass women that hides the fact that your are as miserable as she is and you make the perfect match in your hell. I don’t want you. And your women knew this before your attacks upon me. She is that bitch that you have been with that you would falsely use my name to get your way with your skank. Stop blaming me for what you are. You lost me in your life and you needed to deal with the why’s not the who’s or what’s or where’s. I am not the problem. You are. If I state to get out of my life that doesn’t mean that you as a previous dumbass piece of shit that lost me are to force your way into my life with your skank of a woman to destroy my life over you using me as a weapon with her making her into my arch enemy due to both of you as womanizing pieces of shit in your own formed Scumshit Planet. How dare you pieces of shit for people. Get out. Stay out. Do not terrorize and attack my entire life and children due to you being primitive beasts for people who have nothing better to do than to treat me like you want to treat the skank that you have been dealing with who is not me. Get out of my life. I don’t care who you think you are. Or who you think you have become. Or who you think will make you a better man than that skank you used as a weapon you are stuck with. Get out of my life and stay out of it. Forever. You made your own dog bed with your nasty vicious bitch of a woman. You men that lost me know why you did and why you are duds to me. How dare you lie, cheat, steal from me over your problems and issues. How dare you violate me and my children why you know why you lost me in your lives. Get out. Stay out and know that you have not changed. You are not a better man. You have gotten worse with your nasty vicious bitch that had to hear your complaints with her not me. Tell her the truth of why you lost me in your life. And no longer use me or what delusions that your mentalities think of me in your past. You knew what your problems and issues where and are before your ever forced yourselves into my life and what the summation of your terrorism upon my life is the same as when you were rejected by me to get out of my life. You need your skank and she needs her scumloser. No matter what you tried to revenge me for it is you that never learns that I have enough weaponry in regard to you to show everyone that you remain that scumloser of a man that I do not want. I do not need. And that you endlessly chase your tail seeking that stupid idiot for a woman who thinks she is better than me when she is not and all that you are are womanizers and will never learn the difference. Feel better about your little arrogant ignorant skank scumlosers selves for attacking me falsely and wrongfully over who you are and I am not? Truth bite you and kick you in the ass once again? hm. GET OUT OF MY LIFE. Take your piece of shit with you, you nasty UGLY pieces of shit bitch.

      1. Rock Strongo

        Sorry to hear you’ve been treated so unfairly darlin. But we’re not all bad boys, the good ones are just hard to find.

    2. I agree with everybody. I think that these guys are just manipulative, lieing losers. They prey on vulnerable women and make them believe they will give them the world. In retrospect, don’t go crying t mommy when she pulls a bobbitt on your precious little thang. Or she puts you six feet under. .May be you just got trickbagged by a lieing manipulative women version of yourself. So suck it up and pull your thumb out your ass. Im just saying.

        1. Yikes!!! If they’re over 18 and ALL they do is wake, bake & game then there’s obviously something wrong with them. They’re stunted. Stuck as a perpetual fourteen year old. We should feel bad for them…stop by their granny’s house every now & then to remind them to shower & try to convince them to dump their “Homer” pj’s. But we should NEVER have sex with them…no matter how well endowed he is or how much he SEEMS to know about tantric sex. Remember…he’s a perpetual 14 year old so that just gross plus there is always the real DANGER of procreation. This breed must die out. No question.

  93. CHOOSING THE ANIMAL

    Put two of any species in a box and think carefully how that looks.
    Knowing that the first logical step will be personal survival.
    The second will be dominance and control. That’s just basic instinct.
    Then the nesting instinct, the need for basic necessities.

    Lions mate for life, she does the hunting in most cases, he likes to hang back with the kids, but he adores her and she’s devoted to him.

    Elephants, females push the male away and only use them for breading, male Elephants will spend their lifetime alone and be stampeded if they come within range of female elephant mothers.

    A snake mates and leaves, they do not hang, they are not touchy feely, they need a warm rock and some sunshine. They’re simple folk.

    A rabbit likes to nest, a male and female will love to have children and sleep together forever. They love sex, they are vegans. They are soft and cozy and live a simple life. They are fast too. They like running around in the forest and quickies are lovely sport.

    A fox has a den a wife a litter a life. A fox is crafty, sly, sneaky and she is also. They get along because of their instinct to “try things” to get into mischief. They are also devoted to one another for all intense purposes, they’re inlove with the game.

    A wolf is dominant, impulsive, determined, wise, loves a crowd, but likes his down time to think. He fought for her, drew blood for her. She is the same but is more in protection of her cubs, she will let him roam, she has better things to do. She loves him at a distance and is respectful at all times. He admires his cubs and likes to play with her on summer days. They have fun, but mostly life is serious business.

    In all cases, she makes the choice, but he initiates that dance.

    A female animal has zero time for a man who will not make the investment. If it’s for a week-end or a millennium. Any female who will settle for less then what she NEEDS!!! (yes I said it)
    is a woman who keeps picking the wrong animal. She should know what one she is first.

    Added Note: A female animal will rarely if ever pick a wounded male. Often she will pick up the litter and move on, even if she remains alone.
    Most males will pick available females, he in most cases is not choosey, he wants what he wants and he wants it soon. She is responsible for breeding rights, he is responsible for keeping himself ready to attain her breeding rights.

  94. VeryMuchTrue

    many women just seem to pick the loser men today, but with so many women now that have an attitude problem, it is just as bad. there are many of us good straight men out there looking to meet a good woman, but the women are very unfriendly nowadays. it seems the good women just can’t connect with us good men anymore, like they did in the past.

  95. Having faith in another person’s ability to change is a good quality in a human being. It just goes