They say a parent’s worry never ends. With the global pandemic, there is even greater anxiety from parents than before. This post offers a solution on how to stop worrying about your child’s future.

Once I discovered this solution, so many of my worries and frustrations melted away. No longer did I worry about whether my kids will get into public or private grade school. I also stopped worrying about them getting into college or finding a good job.

Your first money memories may hold the keys to your relationship with money. Perhaps your first money memories may dictate your entire financial future.

My first money memory was getting admonished by my father for ordering lemonade at a restaurant. I was in the sixth grade in Kuala Lumpur. He said that instead of paying for sugar water, I should order water with a lemon slice for free. Not only was it free, it was healthier.

My second money memory was hearing my mother trying to encourage my father to spend more money. Although she was also frugal, I remember her saying he should spend more money to save time. I was in the seventh grade.

My third money memory was getting picked up in a black Mercedes SEL with fuzzy rear seats. It was owned by my father’s friend who was throwing a Chinese New Year’s party at his house. My father was already there, which was why I got picked up alone. I was in the eighth grade and thought this was the coolest thing ever. In contrast, we had a 15+-year-old paintless Datsun with missing hubcaps.

I’m pleased to say my family just took a vacation during a pandemic and survived. With two young children, it wasn’t exactly a relaxing vacation. It was more like a trip or a business writing retreat. Regardless of what you want to call our trip, I wanted to share some feedback.

When the lockdown began in March 2020, I made a promise that I would try and live our lives as normally as possible. I didn’t want to let a pandemic defeat us. So this philosophy included taking a safe family vacation.

After it was clear that San Francisco had flattened the curve, we decided to drive up to our place in Lake Tahoe and stay for a week in October. We figured the timing was good because more students were back in school and families had taken their summer vacations before Labor Day.

I was playing tennis with a friend who happens to be a partner at a large mutual fund company. During warmups, we got to talking about what is the right amount of money to leave our children.

I told him the right amount of money to leave our children is enough so that they’ll never starve, but not enough that they’ll completely lack motivation to make their own money.

He agreed with my statement. However, where we disagreed was on the amount of money to give and leave our children.

My friend used the example of what if his son wanted to be a college professor. His son would “only” make about $150,000 a year, which might not be enough to raise a family if his son’s spouse didn’t work. As a result, he feels that setting up a trust worth $10 million was the right amount.

My instinctive reaction was that $10 million is way too much money. Surely, that amount would spoil his son rotten. But I shrugged off his belief and we started to hit.

After our session was over, however, I started to think more about this subject. Let’s discuss further what is the right amount of money to leave our children so they don’t become spoiled, entitled, and lazy!

If you’ve amassed a decent amount of wealth, you will likely want to leave some of it to your children. Let’s discuss some inheritance tips so we don’t screw up our children.

One of the reasons why my 31-year-old neighbor still lives at home with his parents is because he expects to inherit a boatload of assets. His parents’ home, alone, is probably worth about $2.5 million.

The great thing about my neighbor’s living situation is that his parents only come to visit during the weekends. His parents have another home in the North Bay. He also rents out one of the rooms to his friend.

By continuing to live rent-free in his parents’ house, my neighbor is not only saving a lot of money, but he’s also laying claim to his future assets. When his parents eventually pass, surely the house will go to their by then 50+-year-old son who has been living in the home all this time. He is withdrawing from The Bank Of Mom & Dad with fury!

However, despite being in a position to inherit millions, my neighbor doesn’t seem to be progressing in life. Although he graduated from college in 2015, he still works at a dead-end job. He’s not in a relationship either. Instead, he’s used much of his disposable income to buy and maintain two cars and two noisy motorbikes.

Awkward Neighbor

It would be one thing if he was cheerful and happy every time we cross paths. However, he never says hello and always seems angry.

One time, I was walking down the sidewalk pushing my baby daughter in her stroller. He decides to pull out one of his vehicles and block the sidewalk. He sees me, but doesn’t say hello.

I stop to play with my daughter, assuming he would continue driving his truck into the street or reverse back into his driveway so we could pass. We wait for three minutes. Nothing happens. Instead, he decides to get out and leave his car in the sidewalk. Nice.

If I was his father, I would be concerned. As a parent, all we want is for our children to be happy and independent. I’m afraid that if we can’t teach our children social skills or develop their emotional intelligence, then some of us will decide to just throw money at our children.