Zynga Rejected My Application So I Unleashed The FURY!

One thing I plan on doing in retirement is find a potential encore career.  As a computer and internet junky who has built up a reasonable size blog, a foray into the social media sector seems like a natural extension.  I want to make sure that I exhaust all options before I really kick back and harass my father on the golf course a couple times a week.

Applying to positions is so easy now thanks to the internet and LinkedIn.  It takes around five minutes per online application and you will get an e-mail confirmation immediately after pressing send.  For those who don’t know, Zynga is an online social game maker of Farmville, Words With Friends, and other names that rely predominantly on Facebook’s user platform to make money via ads and virtual goods.

Given I’ve been reminded about Zynga with Mark Pincus’ handsome face all smiling down below in my post, “How The Rich And Powerful Become More Rich And Powerful,” I figured why not shoot them an application despite their horrendous reputation for long work hours and ruthless management..  I didn’t talk to Mark at Marissa’s party, but I did swing by their sweet offices once in the SF Design District.

For most of June and July, Zynga’s stock hovered around $5 a share, a 65% decline from its recent March 2012 high of $14.20.  I figured in my ever optimistic self that it was better to get options at $5 than all the poor folks who joined earlier in the year at much higher levels.

And so, between scrubbing my chiseled pecs during bath time earlier this month, I submitted my application.  A couple weeks later I got this rejection letter:

 

TIME TO UNLEASH THE FIST OF FURY!

Are You A Financial Dumb Ass?

Financial DumbassEvery now and again, I stumble across something that makes me wonder, “Are you a dumb ass?“  Someone forwarded me a post from a year ago where a PF blogger spent $60,000 on a luxury car right after revealing his net worth was only $55,000!  I mean seriously, is that not a little messed up or what?  It’s almost as dumb as a minimalist owning multiple Apple products, a health nut who smokes and drinks soda, a vegan who wears leather shoes, and an evangelist who embezzles millions from you.

When I innocently asked why he spent more on his car than his entire family’s net worth, another commenter responded that it was because the blogger wanted to save money by spending money so he wouldn’t have money left over every month to spend.  Huh?  What?  Hmmmmm.  That’s just dumb.

THE WORLD IS WONDERFUL

Deep Thoughts On Twitter: Cold Food And Suffering

I clicked the 2 minute super nuke button on my microwave before leaving to park my car.  Moose was left outside after a late night of partying and I didn’t want the parking crazies to give me a lovely $70 ticket for blocking my own driveway.

Two minutes should have been enough sizzle time to keep my food toasty before I got back.  Eight minutes later (checked and read the mail too), I came back to ravish my leftover Pad Thai.  Oh, how disappointed I was and so I tweeted:

“If room temperature is considered warm, why does my food always get cold? #Deepthoughts as I ponder the meaning of life while writing.” via @FinancialSamura

My question was sincere, in the moment, and with no time to think.  I got a couple sincerely interesting responses.

Instead Of Twitter Love What About A Twitter War?

Twitter is a truly amazing platform.  I’m impressed with how some can literally Twitter all day and not get tired.  There is definitely an addictive element to Twitter which makes the program so alluring.  There are a ton of announcements of self greatness which I am very fond of reading for some reason.

Twitter Love Examples:

* “I rock because I created an awesome commercial about my product!”

* “My stock picks are up huge and outperforming the markets!”

* “Check out my net worth, killing it up 10%!”

* “Take a look at my new Gravatar picture!  What do you think?  Ain’t I cute?”

* “Happy birthday to me!  Come celebrate with me over on my site!”

* “Thanks!” -> What?  “Sweet!” -> What? “Cool!” -> What?

Blink And Blink Again

It’s safe to say that before you began reading this post, you had no idea you were blinking.  Blink, blink, blink.  Whatcha going to do about it now that you are aware of your fluttering eyelids?  My guess is that your memory will last as long as a gnat, and you’ll forget as soon as you finish reading this post.

It’s amazing how we can blink roughly 36,000 times a day and not even be aware.  Yet, if we were to be consciously aware of our need to blink, we’d probably drive ourselves mad.  How great it is that our bodies protect ourselves from insanity by doing the things for us we have no desire of doing ourselves.

SUDDENLY YOU’LL WAKE UP

My First Car Was A Heap Of Junk How About Yours?

After getting my driver’s license at 17, I talked to my parents about finally getting a car.  I don’t remember why I didn’t get my license at 16, but perhaps it was because I had such a spiffy bicycle the ladies loved.  *Ring a ding a ling * was the sound of my bell every time I rode by a hot girl.

It always felt odd that I had to walk or ride my bike to school when other kids got to drive their new Ford Explorer SUVs, and VW Jettas.  Even my parents drove an 8 year old car at the time.  Oh well, I thought to myself.  Perhaps one day.

THE HIDDEN GEM THAT WAS NOT A GEM